No show

I’m in my office all set to begin the virtual day and the first patient is a no show.  It’s welcomed by many especially on salary but to the me it’s a loss of income. The clinic charges a fee but I’m not making money so it’s one of the banes of the private contractor or entrepreneur.  At times like this I miss my government job , half the patient contact, hours a day of discretionary time.  Here I’m in a factory.  A grind some days. Hour by hour I see patients.  Of course lots face the same trial.  The customer service demands of the fast food place are worst. I remember when I worked as a waiter and the people kept pouring in with order coming at me like bullets. Worse when I was a short order cook.

Right now I’d like a no show except it’s like being laid off. Not a vacation. Not planned.  A disruption.  

I’m actually really blessed. I’ve a work life that’s half what I did younger. Most Fridays I’m off work and I used to work in a third clinic on Friday rather than just the two. That’s the clinic I stopped working at when Covid caused me to work virtual.

I was diagnosed with TB after working as a fly in physician in northern Canada.  The TB where I worked was simply common.  I diagnosed many cases then was diagnosed myself. I was on rifampcn for a year  after that.  I attribute some of my hearing loss to the otoxicity of rifampcin. I certainly had less hearing after that year and nothing else changed .  Given my lifestyle and age the hearing loss is multifactorial. I’m getting by with one hearing aid fine since I lost the other this summer forgetting to take them out when I went swimming.

Now I’m here overall happy with life.  There’s many red flags in the future, aging, and death but overall I’m okay.  I have a good life. I live in a good place with little crime, good neighbours, beautiful dog walks and nearby malls. I’ve only a couple of trips into town or city necessary each week. I’m off on the weekend camping or riding my motorcycle on errands.  I have the joy and pleasure of Laura’s company most weekends now. She was house sitting a lot and then we don’t see each other for several weeks. This is hardest on Madigan , I think, because he just shadows her for 24 hours whenever we get back together after a long part ting. He handles her being away during the week but after a week or two the reunion is evidence of how much he missed her.  

I’ve been enjoying reading.  Gentleman in Moscow was great then Tom Clancy’s latest and then Carl Hiiansen’s latest , the brilliant Wrecker. I enjoyed updating my iPhone to the new iPhone 15 Max Pro and the new go pro 12.  Laura and I had a delightful weekend doing the Burnaby lake duck walk and taking pictures and the New Westminster wharf walk and having fish and chips at the Paddlerwheeler Pub.  The weather has been fine for the fall, some dreary rainy cold days but still many sunny brisk days.  I saw the heron on the Brunette River walk.  Being active has made life better.  We watched Barbie and Oppenheimer on Apple TV.  I do enjoy history.  

Kevin and Anna and the kids shot a 3 or 4 point. Great looking deer. Admittedly I felt a twinge of envy. It’s for the venison.  I’ve not shot a deer since before covid and have a definite desire for venison. I enjoyed the grouse I shot. We’re hunting next week.  Laura and I have the week booked off.  I enjoy the camper.  Admittedly the work of hunting is increased andd I’m concerned about the wear and tear on truck. I do like using the ATV with Madigan riding behind me.  The trouble is that success is best achieved sitting in ambush or tai chi walking slowly through the woods.  Because of my anxiety about falling and slipping now the uneven and wet and quite dangerous forest floor stymies me. I can walk on logging roads and well made hiking paths but once I’m off the trail it’s no longer like the days before covid when I was still a billy goat.  I say before covid because this mobility issue probably stemmed from my falling while climbing Arthur’s Seat in Edinburgh. I slipped heavily in the rain on the slick path.  Not long after I had the worst sciatica for a month and difficulty walking.  It’s steadily improved and last time I was hunting a couple of weeks back I was much more mobile and even enjoyed some hiking. This time I plan to do more of that.  

Time to get back to work.  

I really do have an attitude of gratitude. Thank you God for this day, for my health and Madigan’s health. Watch over Laura and my family and help my friends and patients.  Please be nearer and guide me in what it is I am to do.  Help me this day that I may know you more and follow your will.  Thank you Lord for the green trees and migrating birds. thank you for the furnace and electric heaters. Thank you for the coffee and Star Link and the Apple ipad, iPhone and MacBook Pro. Thank you for communication and feeling. Thank you for email. Thank you for my fingers and these keyboards. Thank you for my life today. Carpe Diem.  ODAAT. Thank you for sobriety.  Thank you for my meeting tonight.  Thank you Jesus.