Brunette Lake Walk

I just finished the Brunette Lake Walk with Madigan.  It shows I’ve walked 8000 steps.  Last weekend I did this walk and then went to Costco and that day I made 11,000 steps.  My goal is 10,000 steps several times a week at last.  Work days I walk Madigan several times around the park and we make usually 4-5000 steps a day.  The health goal is 10,000 steps a day. I also have returned to swimming 10 lengths but my swimming goal would be better at 20.

I’m more than 30 lbs over weight and my back hurts. If I lost 30 lbs and increased my exercise I believe quite reasonably my back would feel better.  

Obesity is associated with metabolic disease and cancer as well as a negative attitude.  Obese people prefer sedentary activity and are irritable when faced with activity.  It fear based.  I gained weight after I injured myself climbing Arthurs Seat in Edinburgh.  I slip and landed on my tailbone.  I’d had a spinal fracture before.  I believe it was old and like from a plan or car crash but this fall really left me in pain. Like the time I flipped my quid trying to drag the elk out of the woods.  Then Covid came and I was isolated and quite inactive.  The sedentary life was quite a contrast to my decades sailing when I was lean and in shape.

Chronic pain makes it difficult to counter sloth.  Now I’m actually motivated to improve my habits.  I do like meals and my own cooking and barbecuing.  Madigan certainly supports eating but he’s so full of activity.  

I’ve an appointment for my Jeep to have the blue ox hitch installed.  I’m wanting to sell my Harley partly because I’m anxious about orthopedic injury given the months and years of surgical delays. It’s one thing to become injured and have to face a year of physio and recovery and another wth another year added for time on the waitlist. I’d rather ride in my Jeep. Equally important I like the idea of minimization with the motorhome towing the jeep and being self sustained.  I will keep the Vespa but am seriously considered an electric bike instead.  The money from the Harley sale will go to paying downf the Jeep loan/

It’s been a good week of work.  I sometimes am tired working and think negatively about another 10 years of doing this.  However i actually enjoy my work, being of service and it’s in no way onerous. I really need to get my head in the same room as my ass. I balk at the thought of routine. Yet I like my routines.

Terry asked me to speak at an online Washington group. I did and it was okay.  More being of service.  I enjoyed Burnaby men’s group and am often asked to share. I really enjoy George’s company and enjoy our regular table with Jack and Neil and Terry and sometimes Ward.  Marty is great and Tombo does a lot. I remember the names of people more which says something.

Politically I’m not pleased with all the Neo communist leading ‘shareholder capitalism’ gangstereism and corruption so common in the Liberal party.  There’s billions of unaccountable money in foreign affairs and Carney is in bed with his old corporation like Trudeau was in bed with SNC Lavalin. They’re both in bed with communist China and the WEF elites. I don’t like the Islam invasion and object to the horrible taxes I pay going to corruption and abuse, nothing that seems to serve me or western Canada, the middle class or pensioners.  I doing fine financially I guess but the loan for the car despite selling truck and mini cooper wears on me.  I’m still paying for the motorhome.  The Carney inflation has hurt my savings for pension while government workers have indexed pension. I remember my brother saying he couldn’t affford to live in Canada if he didn’t work for the government. I’m independent and self employed and find because of my age or people asking if I’m going to retired I think about the future and it’s uncertain.  

I’ve not heard from Laura. She has family and is involved with them and her house sitting.

Frank Zappa said ‘politics is the entertainment division of the military industrial complex.’  Journalism is just ‘gossip”. So I just try to do the next right thing and survive or manage.  

I have the weekend ahead of me and no real plans. I just read a Griff Hosker book of British Army and early Suez Canal I may order the next in the series.  I’ve been listening to the Orthodox Church audio book but it’s a bit dry though there are interesting bits of history and creeds.  I imagine I could be writing one of the three books I’m progressing on but I’m avoiding that.  I have this thought that when I get the hitch done I’ll think of the ‘next thing’.  I’ve got the existing plan to go to Whistler RV park for a long weekend but will have to book that when the hitch is done and hear that places are booking up for the summer.  I imagine too going a way for a few weeks to be by a hot spring (Harrison/Nakusp) or a lake, Okanagan like the time I was at Logan lake.  Work gives order and direction to my life which now is less full and less harried. I look forward to church and imagine next winters going south if only bccause of have the ‘system’ completed. 

I’ve had a life of journey’s and projects, bicyling across Europe, dancing, then university and medical school and country practice and Northern Medical Unit.  White water canoeing.  Mexico. Cross Coutry skiing, Cycling, Then Psychiatry Residencny and California and UBC and country psychiatry,, the Mustang, the Broncho, fishing and later hunting, Vancouver Island and more skiing, hiking, then homesteading with chickens and geese, the country psychiatry practice and downhill skiiing and the SV GIRI , ships captain, die seal mechanics navigation, off shore sailing, downhill skiing Whistler and then sailing to Mexico, sea of Cortez then return and sobriety and IDAA and travelling to all the different American cities, overseas travel, Isreal, Ethiopia, Italy, Greee,  Christian spirituality and masters of religious study, a few poetry books and a reflections on pscyhiatry book, and sobriety and service.  Three marriages, sex with women and sex with men.  Cross dressing anonymity with travel.  The challenge of doing the same old in a different role, all the theaters and ballet and opera and concerts and books read and continued study.  Constant learning.  Ireland and Scotland, Turkey and New York and LA and London art galleries and museums, Moscow and St Petersburg.  Sailing solo through winter hurricanes to Hawaii.  Working in Saipan and the Mariana Islands .  Motorcycling. The Harley and Sturges. Big Game hunting.  8 moose, an elk, 3 bear, 30 dear and countless birds.  The dogs, Shinto, Gilbert and now Madigan’s.  Photography,  

I don’t know what to do when I grow up now.  I’m in one of those lull’s.  Walking Madigan with Peter and Bella and Luka he says I’m leaving behind the Harley guy to be the Jeep guy. I took the truck and camper across Canada to visit the eastern family and returned. Long drives. Three houses and 3 marriages, Yachts and Trailor homes. Nomad.  I don’t know where I want to live or go. I’m really quite content here.  I think of moving to Alberta or the States but like my patients and the clinic.  Politics alarms me and I hope for a new government.

The war continues in the Ukraine and Iran.  

I’m grateful.  Life is a miracle and I have been truly blessed.  Today we walked the Brunette Lake trail and now that I’ve journaled and had a coffee I think I’ll lie down and read some.I really enjoyed the cleaning ladies coming this week.  

Thank you Jesus.

A perfect Saturday and lovely Weekend - Spring

The sun is bright again today. Yesterday it was warm with blue sky.  It was a blessed day.  

I loved that it began with prayer and meditation.  Then I so enjoyed the Saturday morning doctors in doctors recovery meeting. Last week was local , about once a month.  This one is international l and weekly. I like the people.   

After Madigan and I took the long Brunette Lake Walk. I was warm. Sunshine blue sky. Madigan panting.  We first saw the Canada Geese and goslings and later the wood ducks.  I’m grateful that despite my back pain with twisting I’m generally able to walk.  I’ve been riding the Harley and the position is like Dr. Goodman’s Foundation Training recommends.  Easier to do on Harley than Vespa but I just have to remember.  Slouching doesn’t do with lumbar back pain.

After we got back I left Madigan at home while I took Harley to Costco’s . I needed batteries and wanted to look at their Hearing aids.  It turns out they have a selection, all for $2200.  I want a back up pair since my very expensive Oticon pair are necessary for work. I’d like a secondary pair so I  feel better taking them with me.  

I tried selling my Harley but learned from Trev that they only take them in on trade in.  They had a lovely 2023 Trike I could see enjoying. I just don’t feel as safe on 2 wheels and find myself wanting to be cautious.,  I paid $2400 at Royal Bank on he car loan and would like to pay it down.  I’ve even had another $5000 matched for my contribution to the TFSacount last year.  I would like to put another $5000 in for this year. 

It was good to get paid and to pay my taxes and rent another month and weeks

Peter is enjoying the bike.  We’ve been walking with him and Bella and Luka.

At Costco I couldn’t resist a rotisserie chicken and would have got a lot more but I was on my motorbike . I did get more honey and orange juice and the freezer roast beef that’s microwaveable. I now have a freezer full of food and feel good when I do.

With the walk in the morning, Brunette River Walk and Costco I surpassed thee 10000 step mark. I’d been doing 8500 but now went over the top. Thank goodness. I really do have to lose weight and exercise more. It’s a catch 22 with chronic pain. You just want to relax and avoid pain but stretching and steady exercise is way better. I’m always feeling better the day after I do more exercise. With being sick with allergy and flu I spent a lot of time lying around just making the 3x a day walks with Madigan mostly for his poop breaks.  I needed the rest but my back is better with exercise.  Thank God I’m still mobile.  

I have enjoyed the couple of sex toys I picked up at One Stop Love Shop. It gives me great theological considerations.  All about masturabtion.  If I eat for survival it’s okay but then the epicurean who garnishes the food and makes a display may offend the stoic or the born again . I remember the professor in pscyhiatry saying that women are preening and into long foreplay with their lotions and bubble baths.  Men were by contrast on and off.  The orgasm was the thing.  Now there’s the whole issue of sex for children and its religious value producesing community and armies. If gays reproduce and are at least bisexual they don’t offend the community.  The Sin of Onan made much about by Victorian prudes wasn’t about masturbation at all but rather refusal to impregnant the dead brothers wife ands share he land inhearitance.  Now now most of sex isn’t about reproduction and as we’re living long lives there’s sex after menopause for women and men chasing young girls or young men or prostitution or masturbation.  

I loved the joke on Facebook about the guy who said when a girl gets a vibrator it’s though cute and a little sexy but when “I get a turbo charged life sized sex doll with self lubrication mechanical parts, I’m considered a pervert.”  Collectively men had long complained that monogamy has short changed them in the modern world.  This explains a significant percentage of the exodus to Islam of formerly Christian males or simply boyfriends of cold feminists.  Seeking sex they are shunned and the term toxic masculinity is combined with dead beat farther to shame the man while the girl is never criticized where a elder virgin a competing skank seeking a Guinness book entry for number of sexual partners in a day, 200 being the last count though 2000 is the aim.  

I am always pleased to see the handsome men and beautiful women in church. I tell the young to be church tourists and to stop at the the church with the greatest density of the beautiful. .Beauty is spiritual.  

I’m watching Battleship Gallatica in the evening and reading a Raj novel .  I deleted facebook not wanting to support the radical left wing censorship of the same ilk that has the UN chosing reactionary Muslim as head of the civil rights.  Aetheist communist and political Islam are al the rage with the continued war of Iran Israel and the US and the stopping the Strait of Hormuz.  The Ukraine war and money laundering continue and Orthodox Russia held its Victory parade despite the war being stalled on the battlefield.  

Canads is frightening with Carney one of the globalist anti Canada attacking the US and wanting to celebrate the NWO with communist China as leader.  Trudeau dished Christianity and called himself a post national.  I would like to see Pierre Polievre take over and that Iran and Cuba fall to the US like Venezuela did.  I don’t like tyranny.  Scots Whay Hay!!!  Carney with his stolen majority is acting like a tyrant and taxing everything making money for himself and Brookfields while Canadas declines and taxes rises.  

I feel poor but am not so must resist the self pity. I would like to pay off my Jeep and sell the motorcycle and camper and boat..  I’ll keep chipping away at the debt though I don’t find it hard to make payments on that and the motorhome.  It’s just me.

When I was paid yesterday I paid off the credit cards and am okay again. The only outstanding cost is the hitch for jeep and motorhome. I’m dreaming of a few weeks off in the summer and a ride to the Okanagan or Logan Lake again or Nakusp. I ‘d like to be able to swim or have a hot tub.  Maybe along the coast.  It’s just that I’d be able to take my ‘stuff’ and not be left paying for an empty spot like I have in the past or for storage of a vehicle.  I don’t’ want unnecessary costs.

I’m working steady and will feel better when I’m not envisioning working another 10 years to pay off debt. I hope to whittle things down and then pay them off sinew I have the money in the bank. But that idea of ownership is outdated as I write it off and pay half my income in taxes.  

It will all work well. I’m pleased. Was glad to be in church.  The mold was there and at first I didn’t recognize her because ironically she was so tall. She was wearing those boots that added 4 inches and Mae her long legs look great.  She’s always ‘dressed’ for church and that’s been appreciated.  There were a few girls who did the spring thing added Colour to the morning.  Madigan had a great time.  The Priest was visiting and delightful..  

Yesterday was a perfect day and today is pretty good. I agreed to be the speak at an online meeting so I’m looking forward to that be ing over.  In just a few hours I can relax.  

Thank you Jesus for this day. Thank you God. Hallelujah!!!

Good Friday, Easter, 2026

It has been a tough week.  Mostly because I bought the Jeep and acquired a debt that bothered me. I’d traded in my 2017 Mini Cooper and last weekend decided to sell my truck, and camper. They were at Adventure RV waiting to have the one happy jack reinforced.  I worried the night before fearful of the drive out on the highway on my Vespa. It was just a foreboding, an uncertainty. I have this with age now, wondering will I live this truly minor event.  The ride was actually exhilarating .  I wasn’t cold either having dressed sufficiently.  

Kevin said they could get the camper off and I could take the truck in a couple of hours. I rode the Vespa over to Victors. In his Ram we headed out for breakfast. He had his regular omelette while I had sausages and eggs.  His other Veterans came in. Also some folk from the program. He enjoyed chatting with them as they passed out table. I enjoyed the sausages. All round pleasant country men connecting. We talked of guns and the gun buy back too.  

Then I was back at Kevin’s Adventure RV where he was kind enough to use a forklift to load the Vespa onto the F350.

Now I drove back to Vancouver and unloaded so much ‘stuff’ , good ‘stuff’ mind you , at the Maple Leaf Storage Locker, The Honda 3000 generator, tools from under the seat, dog toys of course.  Then I brought back the heavy tail gate and the 4 winter tires.  

The next day on the Grok AI its said the resale price was $40,000. I talked to Ford and the sales man hadn’t got back to me so I phoned next day. I’d taken a day off work to get the Truck because nothing was open on Friday Saturday.

Expectation was the key.  With myself I expected to pick up the truck , drive it home unpack it and sell it. I was exhausted and waited till the next day.

 Then I drove in to Ford and the salesman began dickering because he said I hadn’t told him it was gas not diesel. I lost it and said if I have to do surgery and need to know your blood type I’m going to ask that. I don’t expect you to know that. He wanted me to come back on Monday. He was trying to do the best but I wass frustrated so much that I couldn’t get turned around with all the new cars about. So I went into service which I’ve always loved at Ford.  Told the guy my problem and he understood and drove the truck out of the lot to the gate.  I then drove to another Ford and they suggested because it has the scratches that they wouldn’t buy it because they’d need to fix that .  Canada drives had offered me $33,000 sight unseen but the Journey folk had said that though they were Jeep I could bring it back there when I was buying the Jeep originally. 

I did and Ryan was great. He took pictures, come back next day if the price was fine. He put it out for auction the next day. $30,000 was fine. This was day 3 of the process. That day i drove the truck over. He got the service guys to take my Vespa off the back. I drove home on the Vespa. Great drive.

Monday their accountant was supposed to cut a check.  They didn’t get back to me. I’d signed over the truck and left the truck and was involved in a virtual clinic then I phoned their finance folk and really complained .I was dealing with a woman and police and a machete. I’d ridden my Vespa to the DTES. I had so many people wanting me and here I was catastrophizing about fianances.

I normally don’t think about that because I trust God yet it brings back the divorce where she was on Cocaine and crazy and not showing up at work,  up all night. The dog and I had no place to stay and it was raining and cold and I couldn’t ‘t get any food  or sleep. I had told her I can treat 100 crazy people or her but not both. I needed to get away from the screaming insanity but she refused to go to treatment or get help. I saw a psychiatrist who said my problem was my wife’s severe adiction.  I went to  my so called friends because I knew my dog would be welcome. We’d tried a couple of hotels but they didn’t take dogs.  The biker ‘friends’ realize that I was weak and vulnerable so took the opportunity to capitalize .I’d been their ‘friend’ when I was always financially = well but now tthey stole $30,000 from me along with my truck. In the past we’d all smoked some pot and drunk some wine but in the last year cocaine had hit. 

Fortunately for me I had a bad redaction but for them it was  severe addictions like my wife.  I was now the source of money .So there’s some anniversary trauma shit happening. She’d blown the transmission on my truck and continued to drive it and they kept the truck supposedly in exchange for a car I never got. I hate when the flashback and nightmares come back. I left her and the marriage and the practice that night when she continued drugs and wouldn’t go to treatment.  The lies were worst.  It was when I was with the biker friends drunk at night in the woods that I felt I was outside God’s grace.  That was the height of my ego that I felt I could be beyond God’s love. It was an epiphany of arrogance and self pity.  That day a Christian friend called and I told him I wanted to go back to church .   

Ryan then came through ant the Jeep  and gave m the cheque the accountant had screwed up with.  Now there was no bank open. Next day at noon after an easy morning virtual clinic with my cleaning ladies arriving I went into TD leaving the dog in the Jeep. I deposited the cheque. The loan is with RBC the bank I had with the ex decades back .and perhaps that triggered thing too..  I’ll move the money from TD to RBC after Easter.  

With all that I missed Maundy Thursday, the Last Supper and the Washing of the feet. I remember years I’d eat pancakes and participate each day of the Holy Week. That was when I was attending St. John’s or Christ Church. At. St. Barnabus I’ve been more lax.  

As my  friend George says., “it’s only money’ and today that’s the ‘caddilac’ problem.  We call it a caddilac problem because it’s not a real problem like the time the guy went through the stop sign and hit me on my bike throwing me over the hood bouncing off the roof and then landing on my head and neck on the road. I’d been going to see my Priest in preparation for adult baptism.  Lying on the road I felt I couldn’t fight anymore and was picked up in the stretcher and taken by ambulance to UBC. I was afraid my neck was broken and I couldn’t feel.   I just waited for the MRI results after I’d had the scan. The doctor came. His name was Dr. Priest. He told me nothing was broken.  I was so greateful.  That wasn’t a Cadillac problem  My close friend was quadriplegic and told me when the staff didn’t show up , some dispute with her boss,  he’d said he couldn’t empty his bladder and suffered all morning until his son showed up.

I’ve identified with Jesus’s suffering.  Money problems aren’t the cross but illness and death of loved ones and catastrophes are. I was just so self absorbed in things not going on my time.,  Something I planned would be done in a day maybe two took 5. The $40,000 I was hoping for turned out to be $30,000. I was physically utterly fatigued with my chronic back pain and weakness overwhelming at times .  But it was ‘my way’ not .;thy way’ and I was just catastrophizing and feeling sorry for myself.  These moods and paranoid thoughts were Norm in the days before I got sober. I went from a millionaires with yacht and swimming pools and my dangerously insane ex treated as ‘normal’ managing my affairs while I got help . Insane. Now I know that’s the world of alcohol and ego and the people I knew in that day.  That was a bad year financially and physically but spiritually it was the best.  I loved getting to know Father John better.  I met George and I prayed and meditated and walked my dog and was blessed to know Dr. Lam, Dr. Gutowski, Dr. Baker and Dr. Graham.  I considered suicide that year.  Now nearly 30 years later I have so much to live for.

The F350 Lariat edition super duty with sun roof and long box 4x4 had been with me 7 years. I thought of the hunting and fishing and all the good times camping with Laura and Gilbert then Laura and Madigan. It was a really good truck and now it was gone.  The mini had been Gilbert and Laura and my ride. When Gilbert  became blind I traded the Miata sports car  we loved in for the Mini so I could take Laura and him to the Oregon beaches and cry watching him run free knowing he wasn’t going to bang into anything.  Sailing we’d dinghy into a beach so he could run free on the sand 

I’m aging and dealing with loss. I sold the sailboat getting a pittance for it. I don’t have time to invest in sales. When I wrote a book I was supposed to market it and didn’t because it’d rather do clinical work. I like being of service.  

I’m here now in a motorhome with a jeep. The jeep with a tow kit will be able to be pulled behind my motorhome. I”ll probably sell the Vespa and quad because the jeep can do everything.  I’m reducing and minimizing. I have the money in the bank to pay for the motorhome and jeep but something to do with taxes and such makes it better I just have the loan and pay it off over he next 5 to 10 years but then I don’t know if I’ll have 10 years though I expect it’s another quarter country to go unless I get shot at again or go over a cliff or crash a motorcycle or car.  I have a guardian angel or many and have been blessed for sure.

I used to love the Travelling Wilburies “Handle Me with Car’.  Now I’m more likely to play Holy Holy Holy on the stereo.  I love Third Day and am enjoying the audio in the Jeep . I’m in transition.  From Sailboat to Truck and Camper I’m now in Thor Motorhome and 2 door Jeep Wrangler. It feels right. 

Laura is coming over today.  She has a week of holiday and Madigan and I are so looking forward to her being with us. When she came to LA I rented a car for a couple of thousand so I won’t need to do that . I’l have savings too not needing to pay licenses or storage on all the vehicles. 

I’ve been studying Orthodxoy.  Kevin Anna and the God kids have found a home in a Greek Orthodox Church. Because my church is going to hell in a hand basket with King Charles sounding more Muslim than Christian and the pope celebrating Islam I’m considering what church I can attend.  I’m enjoying learning about Constantinople and the Orthodox and Oriental churchs.  My priest was caught up in the Climate Change UN political money scheme.  She’s partial to the South Americans having lived there. I just see the IPCC as a scam created by the Communist Chinese and orchestrated by the communist Maurice Strong and supported by Pierre Trudeau who allied himself and Canada with Cuba and Castro.  Now Carney allies himself with Communist China and is annti anmerica and freedom. 

 Israel and America are at war with Iran who was the principle ally of communist China.  WHO went over to the dark side in covid when I studied the genetic code and knew they were lying about the poor Pangala.  Fauci then was lying to the President and the whole lies and corruption of Justin Trudea and autopen Biden was going on. Jan. 6th was a scam as big as the declaration of martial law in Canada over a peaceful demonstration.

I’ve been trying to maintain peace of mind.  I remember Anita telling me that she and Willy tried to play it safe in their latter years of service and work and remember how the wonderful wonderful Godly Phillip was persecuted by the authorities for his pro life stand.

I don’t want to be a martyr. I’m more like Peter and would rather be like John. I ‘m from cowboy stock and want to die with my boots on in bed at a hundred or so.  Dad wanted to go when they wouldn’t;t let him sit outside. I don’t think I’ll do well institutionalized.  But for now I want to camp 

I have everything I need. I’ve money in the bank but no pension so fear when carney gloats about having trillion of Canadian pension and his face and the Quatar faces all look like the my biking hunter ‘friends’ who betrayed me taking my money and belongings and dividing them among themselves.

The guards took Jesus’s clothes and divided them in four among themselves.  The Roman administrator Pilate had put up a sign calling him “king of the Jews’.  

Canada seems metaphorically to be plundered by Trudeau and Carney. The great replacement is the removal of the Christians and replacement of them with Muslims.  The Crusades are taught falsely.  Islamophobia is punished yet it is the Muslims persecuting Christians and Jesus. 

Our PM joined with the Hammas Palestinian terrorists and antisemitism  after Hammas killed hundreds of young Israelis at at music festival. It turned out all the billions of aid money was used by Palestine to build a veritable warrior cave system under Gaza to attack Israel.  Yet there’s Carney clelebrating terrorists like Trudeau did.

I feel sometimes looking at Canadian politics this last decade I’m in the asylum.  Not ironically the schizophrenics votes the same distributions in Canada as Montreal and Toronto.

I was going to go to church for the Good Friday mass but have stopped here to journal.

I will go to mass tomorrow with Laura .She asked me to get Hamm for Easter meal.   

I should stop social media contributions on Facebook. X is more mature.   Zuckerberg is pro communist china.  Communism is the religion of aetheism.  

Today is the day Jesus was crucified. In the Gospel of John his last words are ‘it is finished’.

In Mark ‘Jesus cried out “Eloi. Eloi. Lema sabachthani!’

“My God, My God, Why have you forsaken me?”

Journal - rainy Sunday in oct

I admire those who made it to church this morning.  I stayed up late watching an Alaska csonvict escape series with CIA, ski doos and dog sleds.  I’ve also been reading Final Orbiter by Chris Hatfield.  I woke late and had a nightmare that I’d been drinking and was apologizing to friends and family for rude and mean things I’d said. It was a relief to realize I’d not been drinking.  Twenty eight years sober.  I’m not drawn to drink but I do fantasize about illicit sex.  I’m apparently typical of executive men would for years have been in charge and now would like a night of submissive sex.  I resist temptation wondering how quickly a fantasy would become an addiction,  I know I suffer from ‘more’.  If this much ice cream tastes good why not finish the container.  

I thought of fasting this morning, It’s apparently a major healing and cancer cure and prevention. 

I woke late.  I woke early in the dark and went back to sleep and wake again in the light.

The visit to Dr. Ready the Chiropracter gave me a whole day free from pain. I did appreciate that.  Saturday was driving about doing errands.  I picked up my new Traveller guitar.  I have some Christian songbooks and enjoyed playing Blessed Assurance I first heard played by Third Day. The postal strike continues to delay my packages from Amazon.  I enjoyed getting some sweat pants from Epic Men’s ware in the Mall. I picked up Nioxin hair saving shampoo at Chatterers.  I saw a picture of me from a few years ago and my hair was less and thinner. I made an apt with Shirin at Chatters. She introduced me to the shampoo and has been colouring and cutting my hair for some years now.  I am not going gentle into that still night but raging. I tell her when I see her she needs to give me a face lift to go with the full bodied youthful hair she leaves me with.

I had Madigan along with me.  A good companion .  He enjoyed the walk in MEC where I bought new Texas.

I did all these secular things maintaining work and finishing the consultant report I’d done on Friday.  I even used my SRFax for the first time and will follow up on how well it works.  

It was raining heavy all day.

This morning it was raining heavy too.  I was going to go to church but then I convinced myself I need to pray and meditate instead and have coffee and now Journal.  The key thought was that Madigan is going to be groomed this week but now is a fluffy teddy bear everyone is cooing and cawing over, like the Long and McQuade girls and guys .  I towel him off when he comes in from a walk. It’s one of his enjoying events and he waits for me. Just like his little game jumping over my legs when I finish my meditation and do stretches. I just thought I’d not want him wet in church and next week I can go,.

I thought of coffee when I was praying.  I’m drinking the coffee and have a Banana and yogurt.  It’s a slow morning now.  

I have to take my frozen rabbit and partridge to Laura’s . She agreed to let me put them in her fridge. It’s just the drive.  Merry maids are coming tomorrow and the freezer can be cleaned and defrosted. At Traveland for the maintenance day they ask that refrigerate be emptied so they don’t have to plug it in.  I walked Madigan with Peter and Bells and Luka and he told me they go for a day and just asks that the friedge stay plugged in .  My freezer really needed defrosting.  

Now I’m supposed to be a spiritual being in a material journey. I’m practicing Brother Lawrence ‘presence’ which Elkhart Tolled, Power of Now, has a workshop on.  I like Elkhart Tolle not just because George liked his power of now and despite Willie thinking any not directly biblical evangelical spirituality is suspect.  I’ve been Reading Mercer Eliade since my Oxford course on Ritual and religion in Neolithic times.  This is all the ‘shaman’ hsiory which Joseph Campbell’s book also talks about. I’ve been making my way through the audio book Primitive Mythology.

I’m anxious thinking of the freedom of neopagan and the safety that Christianity brought.  The weakness of the Druids was their continuation of child sacrifice the very thing Leonard Cohen’s song of Issac .  I learned this as sang this in my 20’s.  Only later did I learn that this was pivotal to Christianity and its advance of civilization.  The blood cults of the pagan priests had this.  Interesting the remains of bogs suggest that the Druid sacrifice of adults was a voluntary event like the Buddhist self immolation, the best known Thic Quang Duc who self immolated in the 1963 in the Vietnam war. But child sacrifice as with other pagans.  Today we have mass abortion so much a part of the aetheist communist religion.  I wonder if Leonard Cohen cry ‘you who sacrifice children, do not do that anymore.’

Yet we don’t feel so badly if the child has Downs or any of those autistic traits etc which our forebears associated with ‘gifted news’.  The shaman was also selected for abnormality, seizures, some weakness.  Alternatively the disabled child was killed for the group to survive.  The Inuit old left the igloo in the night to save the family by creating one less mouth to feed.

I’m alive today. Thank you God for this. I think of sexual orgies or gastronomic orgies, no longer drugs and alcohol, but other ‘sensationalist’ ‘entertainment’s.  AA is a stoical but I hear of women increasingly who were promiscuous as me and are as promiscuous or seek pleasure in lust as others seek pleasure in gluttony.  We have an epidemic of obesity but the Polly armory crowd if they avoid infectious diseases and we have increasing treatment and prevention get exercise and socialization,.

I just learned from a scholar in the psychology department of Trinity Western. 3 % of people have severe social anxiety and loneliness and more than 10% suffer loneliness. I felt ‘lonely’ after a couple of months in the south. I love the weather but eventually feel my life is here and the vacation world seems to lose appeal by 3 months.  I’m hoping to do better this year. I’d like to write books and be productive more than with just my virtual work. I do enjoy the world and with time this world and that becomes the same,

I am aging and feel increasingly that I’m more and more invisible with the ageism of our society.  I like being the younger person in the old crowd at the hot springs.

I do enjoy my virtual meetings and my life and routine give me the 4 walls of the I’m just a bar tender song.  We create our safe places

.  I established routine and then war against it.  

Right now I’m very grateful for the world I have . I enjoy this living space and felt constricted in my camper which was pretty good. I lived in the little space of my yacht which is closer to this than it was to the camper.  I liked my Keystone RV for space but I never did take it out on my own fearing the towing and size.  I’ve driven this more in months than I did thee RV in years.  The camper has had its use but it’s needed repeated repairs mostly because the Adventurers are a cheap brand,  In retrospect it would have been worth it to get a better quality camper like the Bigfoot and saved money in the end.  This Thor is made good by the support of Traveland.  I’m having a maintenance apt this week.  Coastal Ford has provided me piece of mind by ongoing maintenance and prevention of my ford 350 which has been a success.

Now here I am supposedly thinking of God and spirituality and my mind goes to another coffee and walking the dog. The rain has let up so that’s a good idea, I worry about his pooping since his butt hair caught the poop and we had the whole nightmare of him needing to have me clean his putt nad cut some hair and him being terrified but needing that done.  With grooming I’ll get 4 months of reprieve from Madigan and his butt anxiety. 

He’s loyal and adores me but I feel guilty I don’t play with him enough though he’s will me most of the time. We spent hours throwing ball with Stewart and I did a lot of training with Shinto.  Madigan is with me and he likes that a lot.  I think of parents with their kids in the car and that’s us. 

Walk time. I’ll talk to God while I do that .  Thank you God for this day. Thank you that I’ve been able to spend the time hunting, making the change over from one clinic to the next, kept the Thor going, paying taxes and rent.  I seem to be sneaking through this year with no abundance or savings but I’m managing. I’m getting by and that seems success when I consider so many struggling with the treasonous management of the economy.  So much government interference and cost. It’s a weakness of mine to think like this.  I’ve so much to be thankful for and yet I have a judgemental critical mind that often goes off into sloth envy anger and sins so easily.  Please God help me focus on you and serve you and do your will.  

Thank you Jesus.  

 

Burnaby - Grateful

I am okay today.  I’m grateful for another sunny summer day.  I have slept well. I’m drinking Starbucks Odyssey coffee my neighbor Nicolina gave Laura when she was here motorhome sitting and caring for Madigan. I’m very grateful for such neighbors as Ernst and Nicolina.  I like seeing Mach and Kim most days.  I’ve seen Shane quite often.  Helena was beautiful on the weekend. She told me Dave came by but I missed him and look forward to seeing him,

It’s been a good week. The week has been good.  It’s the people and events,  I’m on my last day today of work.  

Monday was steady. Tuesday I drove the Mini with Madigan into the city.  We stopped at Bean cafe for the Moca, met Gary and Mary Lou and the other staff, I like them but feel guilty since I’ve not been there enough to remember their names. I met with Moninder and it’s been almost a year with one to go till I complete that commitment,  Thankfully there have been no problems. I also saw my medical legal case charged with sex offence.  Otherwise the day at Docside was routine,  

Back home I completed the day with phone calls and virtual.  I did a couple of long walks enjoying the Brunette River and birdwatching,

I’m continuing to listen to Jordan Perterson’s, audio book, We who wrestle with God  I’ve made no progress on my own book though my weekend with Apple retrieving files encouraged me to move forward,

My back continues to ache but much better than last year. I am planning a chiropractic visit.  I’m reestablishing some stretching in Thor after daily meditation.  I’m thankful for the routine,

Maizy has been born, a 8 lb some girl. Alan hasn’t slept and the two are happy.  Adell, the wonderful grandmother keeps me informed. 

I phoned Kevin and Agile Insurance has dropped the ball not forwarding approval these last two months when I didn’t know there was a delay. Thankfully I could call Thaun at Rand and McNally.  He said he’d called and encouraged them,  I’m just concerned that hunting season is approaching and I’ve made a commitment for a week of hunting in Clearwater.  Kevin says he’ll fit the work into his schedule once he has approval,  He’s booked months in advance so it’s annoying the insurance people are delaying,  All shall be well, 

Laura and I had hoped to take the Thor out for the Labor Day long weekend but all the places we’d hoped to camp at are booked,  I’m enjoying being here, I don’t need to leave ,  Staycation in paradise isn’t so bad.  It’s just nice to break from the routine. I am enjoying my Harley. This weekend I have to get my nails done and there’s a Sunday WDIR zoom meeting. I’d thought of church but that will wait another week. I’ve said I’m a summer pagan and winter Christian because I’d rather be in nature when the weather is good.,  

Last night I enjoyed my men’s meeting seeing Jack and Marty, Mario, Ward and George. George is taking his 49 year cake next week and I’m to give it to him,  I am so honored that I’m tongue tied thinking of the night. He’s such a mensch. So kind hearted too.

Thank you God for this day.  Thank you for all your blessings. 

 

Burnaby - ODAAT

I am in my Thor Hurricane Class A Motorhome.  I’m 73 years old.  Still working. Today is Monday and I have a virtual clinic booked all day. It tires me but I love to be of service. I enjoy the routine.  This year and next are planned around my continued work., I’m looking forward to going south this year to LA and Algadones,  I heard that Dr. Jordan Peterson, whose book, “We who wrestle with God” I’m listening to on Audible now, has moved to Arizona.  My favourite place right now is Fountain of Youth nd Bombay Beach Southern California.  For now I’m loving Burnaby. The weather is wonderful.  

I’ve had an incredible journey these last few months, returning from Southern California in my Ford Truck and Adventureer Camper with the Vespa.  I left that at the Chilliwack RV Storage and came back to my Fuzion RV in my Mini.  I took Laura to Harrison Hotsprings, We had a lovely weekend enjoying walks round the pond and hotsprings in the spa.  

I’d not been able to unload my Camper because of damage and weakness at the passenger side Lazy Jack.  That meant I didn’t have the truck to move the RV if I needed to. I confess I felt stranded and an acutely need for a self propelled home.  I’d liked the camper and truck but they were small.  The Fuzion was large enough though I’d had the problem with mice and I didn’t like the garage office.  I’d contemplated motorhomes for years.  Dad and Mom had their Queen they loved and visited Good Sam campgrounds with. 

The political situation has been scarey.  I’ve not felt safe or secure in Vancouver.  I’d rather be in a small town outside a major city.  The peninsula of Vancouver is always a traffic jam. When I was on the sailboat I was safe and could get away but here I was with a sense of being trapped.  The election was won by the Liberals again with massive third world immigration, WEF and UN corruption and major Chinese influence.  The Republicans in the south were a safer bet as the world with doddering Biden and constant lies of media was careening towards worsening World War.  Ukraine and Russia fought on.  Israel and Gaza and Iran fought..  Taiwan stood against Communist China and Trudeau idiocy had made everything in Canada scarey.  At least Carney was an adult though personally ideologically a concern.

The fact of the matter is I had justification for upgrading to the Motorhome after seeing Ernest and Nicholina’s.  I would save 3 months of storage when I drove south.  I imagined reducing to just he Motorhome eventually. I loved the Thor.  I love the Thor. 

It was a status thing too, In the world of snowbirds the motorhome is class A.  I envied my friends Tiffany and the neighbors Dutch star but truthfully I felt home. I felt I was where I needed to be but didn’t like the debt incurrred but my savings would cover the cost and maintain funds. I didn’t like that Liberal mismanagement o the enconomy and corruption created inflation which reduced my savings punishing the good of Canada, by a third. It’d hard being ruled by sociopaths but countries communist China and Korea are worse.

I’m learning to ‘look on the bright side’ and recommended the Monty Python song and tube version of the choir singing on the crucifixion

I’m away of my character defect and tendency to  catastrophize and to go to self pity.  I know ‘poor me’ is a mental virus’s.  I’m okay today. 

I enjoyed the monumental task of buying the Thor and transferring the contents of the Fuzion RV to my new hom at Traveland. Kenny Rogers was a good salesman and like salesman do took advantage but in then end I had the deal. I’d phoned George and George for help with decision making and had the incredible kind, wise and wonderful support of Laura.  Then moving Alina and Alena from Merry Maids helped with Laura and Anna.  Anna was glad to get the Potlach as were Mach and Dave and Ernst.  I had too much ‘stuff’ and was glad to minimize.  I imagine my friend Barb would have sold everything on the Facebook Marketplace and made a few thousand but I enjoyed the happiness of sharing my good time and seeing the joy of windfall in eyes of friends.  It was amazing that it was done and even more amazing when Laura and I drove the Thor to Burnaby.

I was then off with the camper and truck driving across Canada to see the family in Ottawa, visit nephews and great nephews I’d last seen before Covid.  Adell was incredible. I miss my brother and wish he were aicve.  I returned with the hard bottom inflatable and 30 hp.  All the while I continued virtual medicine.  It was a great journey.  

I’d learned that I had cataracts and macular degeneration and my eyes need to be monitored with the possibility of surgery in the near future.  Driving and seeing the country was part of that,  Coming home again was great.

Laura and I then took the Thor to Sunshine Valley, our first excursions and all went well, 

We attended the International Confrwence of AA at the Vancouver Conveention centre and BC Stadium with some 50,000 people.  What an experience!

Then I drove my HD Nightster Special Motorcycle to Spokane for the IDAA. I spent time with the Cyberdocs friends and Madeline,  I’d seen Dave and Dave at the Int4rnational and then again in Spokane, Tommy was a pleasure to be with, She’s in her mid 80’s now.  It was all uplifting.

The motorcycle ride back in a day was a hoot.  I’m so thankful for God’s grace., 

Now I’m settling into a routine. Laura was here with Madigan but she’s gone home. I’v had the week with him He’s adjusting to all the changes.  We’re getting back to routine,

Meagan and Alan had Maizy, an 8 pd baby girl.

That’s exciting,

We’re booked for hunting in October, the Thanbgiving Weekend. I’m still trying to arrange for a weekend camping with the Thor but all the spots were booked for the Sept 1 long weekend.  Sept 10 is the opening of rifle hunting.  I’ ve called Kevin to see if the Camper is repaired.  Dave came by on the weekend while spent time on Saturday and Sunday retrieving data with Ayden at Apple, I’d made a terrible mistake and almost deleted all my files when I was just trying to clean up ny photo files. 

My PAL card arrived in the male but I’m still waiting for the Nexus card though the computer says all is fine,

I’m working on ODATT

I took my 28 year cake at Burnaby Fellowship. Now I’m looking forward to giving George his cake.  It’s a challenge 

I’ve work cases involving the courts at Docside but otherwise it’s no challenge

I continue to attend St. Barnabus Anglican Church but haven’t been this month,  Emily has been away on sabbatical.  

With the scare of losing files I’ve decided to move forward on writing my books.  So I’ll start editting and printing. It seems such work.  Blogging is so much esaier.  Keeping journals.  

I don’t so much wrestle with God as play peek a boo with Jesus,  

Thank you God. Thank you Jesus. I aim to maintain an ‘attitude of gratitude’ one day at a time,  

Lost Hill California KOA RV Campground, California

It was a trial to get through Los Angeles foothills. It’s another time I’ve done them in the day time and they’re not so daunting. The times I did them at night really challenged me.  Now they’re just stressful. I travelled through Pasadena.  The Palisades was where the fires were. I didn’t even see any more smoke. Just the haze I associate with LA.

The KOA campground was delightful.  Kind of a miniature perfect place beside truck stops and gas stations and motels.  Somebody was thinking of us. 

I walked Madigan and he liked the little dog park.

The treat though was the goats. The farmer was there and told me that the two little kids had been born in the last two hours.  What a miracles.  Madigan was most interested and the kids were as curious about him. The mothers were very proud.  

I had a great even and showered in the morning. Another day of driving began with the Macdonald’s breakfast. I didn’t even make my own coffee. 

Burnaby Cariboo RV Park, Burnaby , BC

It was great to return home to Canada

I had a little glych at the Border Crossing. I took the Nexus lane even though the regular lane as just as long. The American’s border agent told my my Nexus had gone through as the computer had told me I was approved. I just didn’t have the card because of the Canadian postal strike before I left.  I had to stop and park my car and go to the counter.  

There young people were being caught by the drug sniffing dog.  Madigan was left in the truck for now. I didn’t like it but I had to pee.  I’m an older man and I’d been hustling to get across the border and home before darkness. My eyes have to strain to read signs at high speed on freeways.  I have had problems at border crossing in my youth. Not as an adult.  Still I tried to hold it till I asked to use the washroom and had to remember a code to get in the washroom which I promptly forget and had to ask again. No visit from the dog. I peed. Relief. 

Then they asked permission to search my truck and camper.  I was fine with everything and pleasant on the outside.

Inside I had the normal array of crazy paranoid and psychotic thoughts.  Maybe while I was away the Communist Chinese have taken over Canada. Maybe they’re going to plan t drugs on me.  Maybe they’ve read my social media tweets suggesting Canadians Liberal leaders sodomize beavers and moose.  They were all perfectly professional and very young.  I’d held Madigan while they my stuff and I could help but think of the FBI and Melania’s panty drawers.  It’s all invasive and intrusive but I confess while I didn’t approve of the FBI searching the First Lady’s panty drawer I was fine.  It was just dark now and driving the rest of the way into the city was a strain. I thanked them and said how much I appreciated the border guard since it forced people to come through the front door.  

All my crazy thinking was for nought.  I was back in western Canada.  Space aliens may have taken over the bodes in Ottawa but not in Burnaby.  

  

It was so nice to see a friendly face and set up like I had for a couple of months .I’m quite adept with this camper and soon even had StarLink up.  I loved my site. The park is so clean and green and well laid out. I was glad the market was still open. There’s an excellent selection for RV’s . I was able to get microwaveable dinners and so enjoyed the shepherd pie.  Cola and ice cream.  Madigan loves to share ice cream. A spoonful is what he gets though he’d like the whole tub.

I’d driven up from Eugene and had been travelling from Salton Sea in Southern California.  I was really nice to be home in Canada. These two months in the southern sunshine have been exquisite. My friend George described his time in Palm Springs and how he enjoyed returning to the green of BC.  I certainly feel that in Burnaby after the brown of the dessert

It’s warm. A little chill at night.  I walked Madigan about the park again and he certainly seemed to enjoy pissing and sniffing in all his old favourite spots. I was able to have coffee and attend an online meetings still feeling thankful having completed this latest expedition.  Laura said she thought it was great I’d missed another winter. She’s been telling me about the rain and snow and flus.  Yes I’m blessed as a mobile nomad sort of person.  

Today I unloaded the Vespa. Madigan rode with me to Bosley’s where we bought his Tiki France and Greece wet food. He’s spoiled.  I took him with me when I went to the PO picking up mail and sending registered male .  

Dave and Helena were back at the place.  Helena’s son is in college and the younger one in high school. Dave;s daughters are well.  Nothing much has changed but they’ve survived the winter. The sun was out, blue sky and warm.  I left Madigan in the camper and made a run to drop off my laundry to pick up tomorrow. Madigan has been book with the vet to be groomed.  Then a trip to Full Basket my favourite butcher. I wanted to celebrate with their steaks.  Madigan agrees I also bought chickens and sausages . They’re such a difference in the quality of meat from this butcher.  Spoiling myself

I love that there are all these shops and services close to the Burnaby Cariboo RV park.  Pretty well in the city.  Such friendly people.  I am so glad to be back.  It’s a moving world of its own.  Peter and Larry who I’d spent a couple of weeks with in LA pass through here later in the year.  I did 2 months in the south whereas most of snowbirds do 3 or 4 months. 

I have a trip planned out east in a couple of months to visit my great nephews.  I like mobility. It’s a lot of work though and I never appreciated that years back when I looked at campers and trailers . I do like the lifestyle.  

Watching Reacher last night on tv I enjoyed his statement, “for thousands of years there have been people who like to stay around the campfire and others who liked to wanders. I’m sure I’m related to the wanderers. ‘. I agree and I’ve a life time of coming and going and now I really enjoy the being here but I loved being at Foutain of Youth RV park last month.  

Thank you God for keeping us safe on these travels and for providing these wonderful safe havings and stopping places .

Eugene Oregon, Deerwood RV Park

I’ve been here a couple of days. Yesterday I worked virtual with computer and doxy me iPad virtual and iPhone. It was all okay. I’m glad to be able to serve and know the patients well. There were three new assessments and that was good too knowing that I was part of the greater team contributing to the broken health care system with the unacceptable delays and all the doctors stretched.  

I walk Madigan.  It’s fairly idyllic here.  Chilly and rainy at night but just windy in the morning. In the afternoon there was rain.

A transformer blew in the wind. I was thankful for my Honda 3200 generator. I’d only used it for air conditioning once before but now it truly was a life saver. I need electricity for the Starlink wifi. The local wifi was out with the power.  

I was able to see the new patients and do the assessments and fax new medication requests to the pharmacy.  All thanks to the generator.  It took them 4 hours or so to repair the transformers and get the power back. I spoke with the lady at the front desk and she was kind enough to tell me I’d know the power was back on when the lights went on in the office.

I ordered Pizza from Roaring Rapids Pizza.  They delivered. It was delicisious.  Meat pizza.  The garlic bread sticks were fine but not what I get from Me&Ed’s at home. It speaks to my nostalgia.  I really like Me&Eds’ garlic bread. The pizza from Roaring Rapids was excellent and watching tv on my laptop I ate half of a large one. I was watching the exciting British SAS series.  I’d lost the channel changer so the tv was down. I rather enjoyed the lap top and understand why folk don’t own tv’s.  My tv screen is just a little bigger and really has its value when Laura is here and I we watch tv together. I set it up on the galley counter and put it away in the bedroom in its spot on the wall.  I’ve the microwave and electric espresso maker out on the wall. I put them away under the table travelling with the mesh rope to hold them in. I really do like the space.  It works almost as well as my yacht used to.  

Life is good.

I pray and meditate. I think of God and time. I’m not as present as I would be. I’m a little in the future looking forward to heading north again on Friday.  I’m looking forward to being back in Canada. 

It was great news hearing we’ve another addition to the family coming.  I shared that with Laura and she immediately said how happy that would make Adell.  She would know.

Thank you Jesus for this day. Thank you for this travelling home and all the functional aspects of it that allow me to work and travel.  Thank you for Madigan. Thank you Jesus.