Now I’m here. I’ve walked Madigan. Yesterday the sun rise was magnificent. So many on FB took photos. Joannne Scott had a great selection with her view out over the straight. I took a couple . Today it was frost. I meditated this morning my my mind is still bouncing about. I caught myself in the shower and reversed the negatie intrussive thought of past trauma, my staff doing crack and stealing only to have the government side with the ‘poor girl’ against the ‘rich white doctor’, while her slum bf was threatening to kill me. So I shuffled that thought out of my mind. I live in fear of the communist Canadian authorities with the degenerate Trudea in charge.
So it’s relatively sunny. I mustn’t let myself slide off the end, That’s how depression and anxiety begin.
Laura is meeting me at the VSO tonight, their Christmas concert.
I contacted the Kingston broker, lovely man , recommended by Kim and told him I was ready to let go of my baby. Not just because of the thousands of cost and maintenance and insurance each year but because it’s a ‘choice’ that distracts me from the more reasonable plans. I’m looking at paying off a mortgage too.
I was delighted to hear from Kevin. He’s working on the camper so there’s hope I’ll have it in the coming year. I’ve decided I could drive it down to Mexico for a couple of months in the coming year.
The winter is not depressing me as it did the last couple of years. Covid was so demoralizing. Now Musk has accused Fauci, the last of a long list. He had banked the Wuhan lab and continued ‘gain of function’ bat studies there. I was annoyed at the lying about Covid early days with ‘wet markets’ and ‘pandolins’. A week of very slow hard coding research showed me personally with my knowledge of genetics that there were serious lies being told to cover up the origin of the virus in the Wuhan lab, Then to have Xi pay the WHO to say a year later that all was okay. I don’t like the Ethiopian business man CEO. They’re a cast of evil characters with Soros and Klaus. Antifida and BLM these Marxist terrorist groups are given free hand while 70 Christian Churches are burnt to the ground in Canada alone and not consequence.
Oh well it’s all above my pay grade.
I succeeded for a while living solely in the day. ODAAT. Carpe diem. Practicing the presence. I wasn’t sure if the sense I got from the spiritual discipline was more spiritual or a precursor experience of dementia. Not bad. My monkey brain is usually juggling so many things,
Like wanting to make a trip to the storage locker to unload a bunch of stuff so I can make room to set up my inversion table.
My back hurts a lot but I’m doing exercises each morning with meditation and that helps considerably. I was swimming twice this week and that makes it better. I can’t walk a block without seizing up but at the beginning of November when I added sciatica to the chronic pain I couldn’t only walk three car lengths . It’s a blessing that I can sit and work. Then I remember the many times since the plane crash and car crash and sports injuries and truck rolls and motorcycle and ATV crashes that I’ve had a lot of times when I was in pain. I think the problem today is my response. I’ve nothing to rise above it. Sailing I think was a major benefit. But I’d shoot a dear or just go hunting and the hunt would have me on over drive exercising. Now I’m on the couch too much. Swimming in the lake this summer was a joy. Certainly hiking in Scotland was a wonder. I loved walking through the art galleries of London and Paris.
All shall be well. More will be revealed,
Thank you Jesus for this day. Help me know and do thy will today. Watch over and help the babies and children in my life. Care for the families and friends. May this be a great day of your glory, Lord Jesus.
Hallelujah!
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