Journal Jan. 31, 2016 Sunday

I’m not doing anything. Well, I’m breathing. My maintenance physiology is running in the background. My heart is beating. I’m thankful for all this.  I’m looking at this Apple computer screen and moving my fingers on the key board. Yet I don’t feel like I’m doing anything.
This sense of ennui that comes over me is associated with some idealized activity.  I’m in the now.  This is a good place. I’ve just walked Gilbert the dog in the woods and enjoyed watching the river. When I woke this morning late I sat and meditated.  I rue the busy structured week because my mornings are a hustle with dog walk, hygiene, dressing and commuting.  This morning I didn’t make it to church.  I didn’t want to drive into the DTES.  I miss church when I don’t go.  I notice the absence of church in my life in the week after I miss a service. It’s the fellowship. It’s the shared worship. It’s that feeling of doing something good.
I haven’t swum. I meant to swim today. I thought too to clean up my garage. It’s a horrible mess. I’ve never got my summer clothes from last year or the autumn clothes to the storage locker. I’ve got to prune my wardrobe too. Just last week I was telling someone how I could easily get rid of jeans, not just the two size smaller jeans but the one’s made without the expandable stretchable material.  I envy women their tights. For comfort I’d be a nudist. Part of my not going out when I’m at home is the unwillingness to put on pants.
When I was on the sailboat I spent days like this but I’d first drive the boat to some anchorage and feel like I accomplished something. Today I’m reading. I’ve been reading Fields of Blood which I erroneously called Rivers of Blood as if geographical constructions are interchangeable when it comes to blood.  I am enjoying Karen Armstrong.  I’m also reading Duncestan or Dunscefield, the WWI English colonels dispatches and journal from his time commanding a unit in the middle east.  It’s been months now, actually since being in Istanbul or Moscow before that, in which I’ve been trying to educate myself regarding that whole area I thoughts was vaguely Eastern Europe then India and China.  I really didn’t know much about Afghanistan, Iran, Bagdad, Iraq, Kurdistan, Armenia, or any of the newer stan’s and couldn’t pass a geography test on the seas. I’ve read the news and repeatedly looked at the google map to see what people are talking about but it’s not been very well established in my mind. I am like the american who asked me where I was from and when I answered Canada, said ’that’s to the north, mexico is to the south’.  Part of it too is my visual memory. I seem to have lost the capacity to remember and see things easily in 3 D.  Throughout medicine and surgery I had an uncanny mind for that sort of thing but now I’m more prosaic though do see relationships and understand things in a peculiar way that seems easy to grasp to me but to others seems befuddling. I miss the 3 d memory. I used to love seeing chemical molecules with all their bits floating in the air.  It’s probably a muscle. If I would work it more it would come back. I’m fat in my gut for lack of sit ups and other parts of me including my mind are sedentary.
I need a road trip. It’s too early to get the bike out of Trev Deeley.  I had this weekend and could have gone snowshoeing or skiing or fishing. I see these days off as precious and then so much recently all I find myself doing is laying about .  I shopped for essentials at Walmart yesterday, got myself a couple of new shirts and a pair of rubber shoes. I really should cull the old stuff.  I threw some underwear out because there was a hole in the side.  I think a moth got at one of my sweaters. I’ve had to put my kilt away since last week. It’s all hanging in the garage but I’ve just not put it in its bag.  I keep waiting for my Mother to return.  I want to hire another cleaning lady but I don’t like having people in my place. I like my privacy and go years between times when I’ll actually trust someone in my home. I think if the wives had lived elsewhere we would have lasted longer. Gilbert is the best of company. He’s a dog.
Right now he’s curled up on the comforter I got cleaned with the view to changing the one on the bed, for no reason other than it seemed timely.  In the meantime I’d moved the comforter to beside the bed and Gilbert has made it his bed. I don’t think the original plan is going to fly.
There’s just a whole bunch of ‘should’s’.  Like shaking out the rugs.  I did clean the stove and microwave this weekend.  But I’m mostly psyching myself up for another week of work. It’s a lot like war.  Frontlines.  I cringe at the yellers and the threats.  I worry I’ll lose it when I’m talking to the happy happy government people.  I have to get over my self pit and martyrdom.  It’s really a pretty good place I’m at. I’m really thankful for all that is happening in my life. I guess I have a bit of that waiting for the shoe to drop. There’s always these lulls and then the storm but mostly it’s the weather. I felt worse in November.  It’s already February and the spring is spectacular. I always feel great when the light returns but the taxes and the deluge of license fees is just overwhelming now.  I find myself worrying about how I will ever take a break because everyone wants more and more money. All the ‘takers’ have increased their fees and my income just decreases like the canadian dollar. The government is the worst.
Boohoo.  Thank you God for my health. Thank you god for this safe cozy place with warmth and heat. Thank you God for Gilbert and his healing back.  Thank you for this computer. thanks you for an income. Thank you for this day. Thank you for friends and family. Thank you for the books I get to read.  Thank you for history and spirituality. Thank you for prayer and meditation. thank you for the refrigerator.
Really I probably am just needing another coffee.  I was morose there earlier and I just needed a sandwich. Then I napped.  I was a bit off and had a bowel movement. These are things I rarely notice in my work week. I’m lucky to get to sleep.  The weekend comes and I’m on the couch.  Gilbert is snoozing.  He’s has no guilt or shame about anything.
I do the dishes.  I swept the floor a month or so ago.  Gilbert’s toys are everything .I vacuumed centrally yesterday.  I have a new bathtub. Things are getting done. I have the most unrealistic expectations. If it’s not failure to be taken by the aliens I’m pissed because I didn’t make the cut for the rapture.  Even if I was taken to  a different galaxy I’d probably still have to clean my room.  l just don’t have room for the stuff.  I think of buying another house but remember the last one with the basement and the increasing hoarding of ‘stuff’.  Stuff expands to fill the space.  That’s what I liked about the boat. Everything was there. Right now I think of playing my guitar but it’s under the clothing in the garage.  I suspect I’m not wholly alone in this experience. On Facebook the other day some one asked about who made their beds and several of my friends took pride in their OCD. I throw the comforter over the bed solely because if I don’t Gilbert will jump up when he’s wet and muddy and lie on the sheets where I do.  If the comforter is there it’s less a tragedy to have his wet dirty little body on the bed. I like to get into relatively clean sheets.
I bought a couple of shelves yesterday to add to the collection of shelves I have for the express purpose of reducing the chaos. I have this one shelf that will take care of the books I have around with the express purpose of reading immediately. there’s about a dozen. They’re ‘urgent reading. They re on the floor beside the couch.  I’ve downloaded 5 science fiction kindle books about earth being attacked and the defenders fighting off the fleets of aliens.  I read these like candy several over the last couple of weeks.  Meanwhile the ‘real books’ the ones I have to read are cluttering the floor beside the couch. There’s an addiction textbook , four voluments at the office I had intended to read by Jan.  I’ve read  few chapters. How did I read all those textbooks on brain injury in the last couple of years and  all those theological textbooks. I’m just plodding my way through this Fields of Blood. It takes me an hour to read 10 pages and I keep cross referencing bits with the encyclopedia.
I’m a whiner.
 I hate that I’m a whiner.
 I want to sail across the atlantic but fantasize about barging down the nile with fans and people feeding me grapes. There’s two sides to me at war, one industrious and the other very very lazy.  It’s amazing I’ve got this far.  I could die soon too.  I’m of the age when people do that sort of thing.  I can see the advantageous. Right now death would solve the whole cleaning issue.  I stay around though for my dog.  I also have obligations and concerns about people. I figure to I must eventually do something with my life. Mostly though I feel I’m on the bench waiting to be called by God. A part of a back up plan.  I saved a life last week. The rest of the week ws coasting but there was one person who if they’d not seen me would have likely been toast. I’ve found it quite amazing that just having age and seeing tens of thousands of people I know things that others don’t. It was that sort of thing that others would have missed. I’d have missed it a decade ago. But I’ve seen it ow several times so recognized it before it caused death. Death is that close at times. So I was useful, not just the usual waste of flesh that I feel at these times.
There really should be a place on a mars shot for a fat old white guy. The world is tired of fat old white guys.  Everywhere I look I hear anger and abuse about what my great great great grandfathers and grand mothers did by climbing down from trees faster than the neighbour and developing a better club because they got up earlier in the morning.  I’m thankful that my ancestors were quicker on the draw but I’ve been relatively slow and today I’m just really tired of all the abuse.  This divide and conquer of course is what the 86 world leaders want. They want us scrapping about crumbs and fighting over who has freckles and who doesn’t so that they can keep more to themselves.  Maybe they’re managing things better though I don’t know. I, like all the other critics, can’t manage cleaning my room but I think I should be in charge of NASA if only I want to get off this planet before the grim reaper takes me.
Really I don’t.  I want to be in Thailand or Cambodia or Ethiopia. I want to be somewhere I’ve not been walking around learning.  I know too that when I’ve done that for a bit I want to be right back here where I am. Indeed this weekend I’m really enjoying being in this place I pay rent for but rarely use. I’m thankful that I can hang out with my dog.  That’s a real treat.  I am really very fortunate.  I’ve enjoyed the mush mind netflix run I’ve been on this weekend watching a half dozen shows of Jessica Jones and Occupied. In one a superstring woman with amazing sexual energy fights a mind controller while in the other Norway is occupied by Russia.
I was glad to talk to family. That’s enjoyable always.  Good to hear they’re okay.
God thank you for this down time.  I know it’s better in the boat where I’m bouncing up and down and doing the very same thing, reading, writing, watching tv but this is pretty good. I’m very thankful for my back yard. I like that I have a back yard. I liked the balcony on the apartments but this backyard is so much better. I am thankful I had chickens and geese. I ‘d like to have chickens again.  But I’d rather travel.  Travelling is something I want to do more of as part of the research I continue but there’s Gilbert and I have to consider where he would stay when I travelled. I like to visit churches and cafes.  They don’t particularly welcome dogs in churches and cafes. A road trip he can come on. Either on the motorcycle or in the car.
We may have to go to the US for a weekend. That’s always a great break. Overnighting a cross the border.  Bellingham Seattle. I worry about the peso like value of the dollar.  But then I could go to Bellingham rather than Seattle.  That would half the cost.  Yes that’s a possible plan. I have these vague ideas that get me week to week. Something in the future that seems interesting.  Anything to break up the routine.  I admire the god kids for their ‘outings’ to the woods and streams.  I could have gone looking at sea dos and wave riders.  Maybe a second hand one but where to store it.  But if I had one maybe I’d go up the river.  I’ve got my boat and could get out in the little boat and go up[ the river.
No i think I’ll have another nap.  

Justin Trudeau the person, and Justin Trudeau, the politician - personal political ramblings

I feel badly sometimes criticizing politicians, especially spoiled rich kids like Justin Trudeau. I admit I’m envious of spoiled rich kids because I’ve taken such flak from others for being a spoiled rich kid.  So many of these ‘comparison’s’ are relative.  Personally I’d left active participation in politics decades ago. When I was young I ran in elections and was on student councils and in media and served as “youth representative to parliament’ and served in secular and church authority positions. As a physician I served in my section of the BCMA and attended meetings and rallies. In work I’ve served on committees and been directly involved in preparation and presentation of position papers.  I’ve been a member of the Canadian Human Rights Association, The Canadian Civil Liberties Association, the Psychiatrists Against Political Abuse of Psychiatry, and still am involved in a few community organizations. I am a member of a church and have done service in that church organization.  Today I’ve been on Boards but generally over the years limited my ‘political public service’ to voting, membership in a political party and contributions.  Often these days my favourite contribution in my community is attending charity funding raisers and contributing to the ‘silent auctions’.
I’ve not been involved in city politics and admire a friend who has served there. My mother was very involved in local community politics but I’ve been more involved provincially and  federally, When I last voted in a city election I didn’t even know who or what half the parties stood for.  Provincially I’ve voted and I have been involved in some provincial based debates.  Federally I’ve been involved almost continuously since I was in my 20’s.  Indeed I always considered myself Liberal, having met Pierre Elliot Trudeau and thought him really smart ‘for an old guy’.  I actually considered like many in my generation that killing off anyone over thirty might make for a better country.  I rejected the liberal party some 20 years ago citing Churchill who said, “If you’re not a socialist at 20 you have no heart, and if you’re not a capitalist at 40 you have no brains.” I was increasingly dismayed by the corruption in the Liberal party and as an English western Canadian incensed at all the wealth that Quebec acquired through the Liberal party at the expense of the West. My friend was a member of the Western Canada Party and increasingly I saw that if Canada as a whole could vote on Quebec Separation we’d likely do better without them.  Meanwhile increasingly the decisions of Pierre Elliott Trudeau were increasingly the cause for so much that was problematic in Canada. I understood that his nearly bankrupting Canada had caused both Conservative Mulroney and Liberal Chretien to have so little money for health care.  Trudeau’s principal constituency was Quebec and lawyers.  So increasingly instead of science we were getting more and more government and less and less service directly as a consequence of Trudeau ideology.
Meanwhile the communist ideas I ‘d liked as a teen ager became apparently brutal with each year of mounting evidence of the millions killed in Communist regimes. I began writing letters on behalf of scientists imprisoned in communist countries.  The eventual falling of the Berlin wall with the increasing release of information and transparency finally destroyed my love affair with Trudeau.  After the horrors of communism became known it was for me like the exposure of Auschwitz to the world, I could never again respect Communists as I could never ever respect Nazi’s once I’d seen their gas chambers.  Trudeau fell from his pedestal, his lapel rose poisoned by history.
Now I wasn’t fond of George Bush, Jr.  I liked that he was a recovered alcoholic and made no bones about that. I also liked that he was a Christian.  I loved his mother and his father had been one of the brightest men in American politics.  That said, he was a Dynastic Ruler.  Genetics is important, especially in race horses, but the European history and Eastern history of Dynasties said mostly that they were best at serving themselves and least concerned with serving their countries. I liked democracy and elections because of the competition and the belief that ‘meritocracy’ would lead to the ‘best’ choice.  Trudeau is a Dynastic Leader like George Bush Jr.  I don’t like him fundamentally because he smoked dope and did so at work.
Because my work is partly ‘police’ work, as a Medical Review Officer, it’s been my job to ‘monitor’ doctors, nurses, pilots, ships captains and drivers who themselves have ‘smoked dope’ or ‘drunk’ or ‘done drugs in office’ or ‘work’.  I personally am in recovery.  I was advised to smoke dope by a psychiatrist I saw about anxiety and bought marijuana from physicians.  Somehow the whole ‘illegality’ of the process and the ‘criminality’ of ‘drug use’ given my position as a psychiatrist began to wear on me.  When I saw a drunken doctor’s decision cause a patient’s death and saw a dope smoking doctor’s decision cause a patients death I became very concerned about the whole issue of ‘impairment’.
When I became open about my smoking dope and drinking wine, no more than judges, lawyers, hospital administrators and members of the College and Physicians or police around me and likely less than what was going on in the Trudeau home, I was severely “punished’ and ‘grossly stigmatized’ and ‘subjected’ to an unforgettable near death experience at the hands of very dangerous doctors who could justify their behaviour because I was a ‘dope smoker’.  I was ‘invalidated’ and ‘lost all my rights’ and was horrendously abused as I told the truth.
Now I appreciate that Justin Trudeau wants to ‘decriminalize’ marijuana.  Marijuania has been decriminalized essentially in Canada for more than a decade.  After my harrowing experiences which occurred as a result mostly because I did smoke marijuanai and associated with those who drank and drugged, albeit in high places, I remained ‘abstinent’ believing quite frankly with the political deceit and political dangers in Canada that I couldn’t afford to be ‘witless’ among so many rather sociopathic individuals. I found that the drug and alcohol abusers in general, especially those in high places, were the most sociopathic of all.  I gravitated increasingly to those who didn’t abuse drugs and alcohol and consciously didn’t break the law.  I simply like lawful people today. My brother has always been such and my family in general has been law abiding.  So it was fairly easy for me to return to my roots and accept that smoking marijuana hadn’t just been about the drug but had included an element of arrogance and just a touch of the ‘outlaw’ superiority that dominates the underworld.  I liked that I ‘got away with it’.
Yet I went to a psychiatrist and told him about my marital problems and anxiety and he thought my drinking wine and smoking a joint was just fine.
Today I would be smoking a joint and drinking a glass of wine if only because the ‘legality ‘of the thing’ would made that whole laissez faire easy going reality attractive.  Consciously not smoking, (I’d started smoking cigarettes which was my gateway drug for marijuana, and interestingly never thought anything of nicotine till I realized how dangerous it was) I began a journey of spirituality.  I also politically became increasingly informed and insightful about ‘morality’ and ‘ethical behaviour’.
I was meditating and very involved in pursuit of the truth and being in touch with my true self when I smoked marijuana again in psychiatry. I’d tried it over in Morocco but din’t really smoke it again till I was in psychiatry. Mostly my use of drugs or alcohol was highly circumscribed by my study of medicine, my work as a doctor and my onerous on call schedule.  It was only in psychiatry and on vacation that I used marijuana again, doing it with the psychiatry staff and gravitating to psychiatrists who drank and smoked dope. Most don’t.  It’s actually only about 10 % of physicians and 20% of lawyers and judges who abuse drugs and alcohol.   It’s amazing given the opportunity we all have that more than 80% of professionals are not impaired.  The head judge of the Supreme Court of Canada was a falling down drunk but the other four judges were sober caring.  I know the head of obstetrics was a drunk but the rest of the obstetricians I knew weren’t.
When I was younger I was highly critical of the one bad apple. Today I am utterly amazed and grateful for all the men and women in positions of power who do not abuse that power.
I have made amends for my poor behaviour. I caused no death, caused no harm to individuals, double and triple checked my work and asked colleagues opinions more if I was ‘hung over’. I was considered an exceptional doctor and psychiatrist and highly celebrated for my work and even my integrity both before and after my ‘disclosure’.  The worst doctor and most immoral unethical and corrupt was a doctor in position of power who was indeed to the best of my mind sober.  Psychopaths and sociopaths don’t need drugs and alcohol to hurt people. Yet drugs and alcohol commonly makes bad behaviour worse.
I worked on ‘wet reserves’ and ‘dry reserves’ when I was a physician with the Northern Medical Association and noted that despite all other variables the ‘wet’ reserves were the places of utter hell, depravity, disease and abuse while the ‘dry’ reserves were heaven by comparison.
Justin Trudeau’s mother was an addict and I have known so many Adult Children of Alcoholics and Addicts to appreciate the difficulties children experience growing up in families with active addiction.  Justin Trudeau brother was an addict as well. His father was aloof and intellectual.  Justin indeed has a fine sense of humour at times talking about his father.   But again I’ve had too many friends and patients who have been the children of the famous. It comes with major burdens.
My parents believed in work and I didn’t get an allowance but rather got a ‘wage’ for work I did in my home. I have this antagonism about the ‘idle rich’ a communist Canadian thing.  Yet, with protestant parents I was inured with the “protestant work ethic’.  I was also raised with a lot of ‘duty’.  It was my job to help those who were less fortunate, the young and the old.  I was raised on ‘noblesse oblige’ and ‘charity’ and heavily criticized if I ‘looked down’ on the disabled’.  It was however perfectly acceptable to criticize the lazy and the drunken.  When there was work to be done everyone had to pitch in and those that didn’t do their ‘share’ of work shouldn’t get any reward. This was fundamental in my upraising.
There was also this idea that as a member of the middle class we had a taxation system that was wrong as it supported ‘white collar welfare ‘ and ‘blue collar welfare’ , the ‘takers’ and the ‘cheaters’.  I loved singing Christians songs about Glory trains and what they carried and how they didn’t carry ‘cheaters’.
I have friends who were born wealthy.  A lawyer stole my grandfather’s estate. He stole the estate of a dozen of the richest men in northern manitoba.  Since the lawyers didn’t ‘catch’ their own, and our family and our friends family lost ‘millions’ we learned at a young age that the ‘courts’ were corruptible and judges there were laws for some and laws for others.  I loved Animal Farm. It was one of the very best books I ever read.
I don’t know Justin Trudeau.  As a person he suffered the loss of his father and the loss of his brother. I’ve lost both my parents now and empathize with those who have lost family.  I admire that Justin Trudeau is a family man but having married brilliant equal feminist female doctor and done 10 years in that rodeo I see Trudeau and his marriage as a 50’s sort of union and understand why he gravitates to the Islamic chauvinistic traditions despite his parroting the words of his female writer “It’s 2015”.
He’s an actor.  I can’t understand why the Elite in Canada don’t hire the Sutherland.  Both father and son are better actors than DiCaprio and certainly way better than Trudeau. But Trudeau has the ‘brand’ name. He’s like Kardashian’s in that way.  I’d love Keefer Sutherland for Prime Minister.  He’d give us a show like Reagon did.  America went with an actor and I don’t know how much material of his was ‘original’ but do know that when Trudeau ‘improvises’ he tends to put both feet in his mouth. He’s not that bright.  I am considered very bright and I know people like Colonel Hadfield who are extremely bright. So I rue the new politics where ‘accomplished men’ like Colonel Hadfield aren’t able to be prime minister because we get ‘brands’ or ‘lawyers’ or ‘actors’ instead.
I liked Mr. Harper because he was a western English Canadian who was an accountant and kept Canada from the fate of Greece during the world’s toughest economic times.  I’ve increasingly like the Conservative economic model too.  The Liberals and Conservatives are really two sides of a corporate coin. I like think the Liberals are Quebec Mafia and the Conservatives are American mafia.  If I have to pick between the Hell’s Angels and the Tongs being western I’m going to pick the Angels. It’s not very advanced. I make decisions in my area of expertise with great erudition but in politics I’m often limited by the horrendously dumned down and biased media filter. I miss the early days of the Winnipeg Free Press when you could actually read a newspaper and learn what was going on in the world because journalists were picked based on their knowledge not on the ability to sell cereal.
The fact is that if Justin Trudeau were to go against ‘legalization of marijuana’ and agree to be randomly drug tested (especially every time he smirks) I’d be less antagonistic. He seems like a pretty nice guy as a person.  I have a friend who is an actor and he’s a hell of a nice guy.  Good father and family man too.
It’s just that in Canada we are encouraged to question every aspect of the person who is our leading politician. I objected soundly to Mr. Harper being demonized. The Liberal followers called him Nazi, Hitler, and some actually said he ate babies.  I didn’t like the tone of the new politic discussion but since that’s where we are I find I have a real penchant for this kind of mud slinging. The Democrats and Republicans in the US have been attacking each other since the days of Nixon. I learned later that Nixon’s impeachment for what he did was only because he go ‘caught’. The democrats were doing the same.
They say ‘all’s fair in love and war’ but in truth ‘politics is mostly a war of words’ and the victimization of Mr. Harper was no greater than the victimization of Mr. Ignatieff. That poor intelligent fellow who left academics to teach Canadians was pulverized by everyone.  Canada is a collectively stupid thuggish country with little respect for accomplishment or intelligence.  Some say this is the consequence of the Brain Drain to the US.  It’s like the “tall poppy syndrome’ of Australia. Stand up and you make yourself a target.  It’s the new politics.
Justin Trudeau is our Prime Minister. He has won an election with a third of the popular vote but he’s the winner nonetheless.  The corporate party of greed of the Liberals has beaten the corporate party of Greed of the Conservatives and the NDP.  Each ‘Party’ represents it’s own base of Big Money.  The pollyanna lies each tells comes down to let me ‘spend your money’ and ‘make myself and my friends rich’.  Also all Canadian and American parties ‘promise change’ but in fact the very nature of government is to stop change because ‘reform is the enemy of those who benefit from the status quo’.
I loath the corruption in the liberals with the Chief Financial Operator having the greatest investment in the Legalization of Marijuana. Conflicts of interest like this are common. Given the recent ‘physician assisted suicide’ position I wouldn’t be surprised if some politician didn’t have an investment in a particularly effective gas agent for killing people.  But that’s just politics.
It’s all just politics.
People didn’t think America would survive George Bush and then they didn’t think we’d survive Obama.  The same was true for Mulroney and Chretien and now Harper and Trudeau.
I think it’s all above my pay grade.
In the Scottish Irish home of my birth if anything went wrong you first blamed it on the weather.  Next you blamed it on government. Then you could blame anything that went wrong on the Communists or the Catholics.  Bankers and the Elite were sometimes the cause of blame if weather, government, communists, catholics didn’t cover it. Always the tax man was as bad today as he was in the day of Jesus.  Then you could blame things on outsiders or newcomers.  As kids we liked to blame things on the old.  Then you could blame things on religion. Now you can blame things on polluters.  For a while there you could blame things on science and always you could blame things on lawyers.  We never blamed things on each other. We loved our dogs but we did blame things on the dog especially farts.
So the bottom line is we collectively get the leadership we deserve. That’s the spiritual way of looking at things.  Justin Trudeau for whatever negative I think of him represents those negatives I won’t own within myself. That’s called projection.  I am not all I could be so I blame someone. Justin is the devil in the secular world. He could be the saint too. It’s really just a matter of weather or whether the dog farted in the end.
Personally my own struggle is always with God.  I am the orubunga and I mostly think I’m the tail of the snake being bitten by the head of the snake.  Does the butterfly think the philosopher or the philosopher think the butterfly?

Moderate Moslems

Of course there are moderate moslems. There are Moslems saints and wise men. There are beautiful Moslems and happy Moslems and Moslems who sacrifice their own lives to save the lives of humans who are not Moslems.
I feel badly that I have had to be critical of the misinformation and disinformation of our politicians and media.  Their cupidity about Islamaphobia and political correctness surrounding terrorism forces everyone to ask, “why are they lying?”  To know they are lying follows asking “Is Islam the religion of peace?"
Islam is no more the religion of peace than Christianity is the religion of love.  It has long been said that the founders of all religions would not going the religions named for them if they were alive today.  Further what people say and what people do is one thing.  What there followers do is quite another.  Mohammed was a warrior and a killer.  He did at times preach peace.  By contrast Jesus was a healer and a teacher who did not kill and did preach love.  Buddha was an elite prince who renounced the world and became a monk who encouraged non violence. Abraham and the other founders of Judaism including Moses and David were patriarchs, kings and warriors.  Some were prophets. And all religions have martyrs. Hinduism is a polytheistic mystical religion begun in the times of warriors but carried forward by ascetic monks and sages.   Confucianism which some say is not a religion but more a philosophy was begun by a eurocrat working for a warlord.
History is made for the winners of wars.  We don’t hear much about the Quakers, a particularly non violent group of Christians any more than we hear much about the Sufis a usually non violent group of Muslims.
The fact is violence is the work of men and women who want power.  Having power they want to retain it and use religions of all stripes to maintain it.  They justify their violence and greed with religion. In the case of the atheist communists they don’t say a prophet told them but instead say their guru Marx or prophet Lenin told them to kill everyone who doesn’t agree with them.  Robespierre an anti-Christian deist was behind the French Revolution killing tens of thousands of his enemies.
Triangulation is a psychological defence in which one individual abdicates from responsibility of their actions one to another by attributing their behaviour to a third party. Today if an individual told me he had attacked me because his voices told him to, I’d consider him insane.  However, many a world leader has attributed violence to ‘voices’, “laws’, ‘committees’, “Gods”, ‘the people’, and today maybe Aliens, all as a means to confuse and control.  No one is certain whether or not it’s worse if a world leader actually believes his own shit or is just using this for the benefit of power acquisition and justification for treating others poorly.  A common ‘defence’ is the ‘greater good’ and for the future. Today all manner of shit is being said on behalf of the ‘future’ and for ‘the planet’.
In terms of logic and fallacy it’s always an ‘appeal to authority’.  There are also laws on earth for the rich and the poor.  The judges who would disagree would themselves be killed.  The winners write history.  The losers, lacking tanks and jets, create the best propaganda and makes the best promises.  They usually have maternal sexy babes with lose morals. The appeal for young men is a sort of mixed of sex and authority thing.  This is not to say that the rulers don’t have their share of “honey pots’ but the women of the ruling classes are more likely to say something like “give them cake’ rather than listen ad infinitum to their rambling intellectualism.
To the best of my understanding, Moslem countries are generally conservative.  It is worth remembering that secularism broadly speaking, the separation of ‘state’ and “religion” is condemned by Muslim intellectuals, and further in most Muslim majority states even where there is secularism there is a parallel court system of ‘sharia law’.
(Canada is definitely moving in this direction with their aboriginal or pagan court system parallel to the mainstream secular court system.  There are also some ‘sharia court systems’ in Canada but no Catholic, Christian, or Buddhist court system showing the fundamental break down of equality and freedom in Canada as just one example of devolution of western secularism. In Europe sharia courts are proliferating just as ‘gang’ justice proliferated in former communist countries after the fall. )
The most liberal of the older Moslem countries appears to be Turkey, Tunesia, and  Egypt.  It is worthwhile to note that these states, though Muslim majority, are under attack to Jihadists indicating how costly it is to be a ‘moderate’ Muslim or indeed a secularist Muslim in the world today.  The Jihadists are equally if not more hysterically enraged by their brother Muslim’s who refuse to accept their dictatorship.
(This is not surprising given that the French revolution killed tens of thousands of their own people while the various communist revolutions killed millions of their own people who disagreed with them.  Indeed “either you’re for us or a gin us’ is neither religious or secular but equally revolutionary as the standard revolutionary argument,  ‘if you don’t agree with me, I’ll kill you’.   ‘Ad hominem’ rhetoric or attack on the person in debate  causes  ‘forfeiture’ of the logical argument  because a long long time ago men realized they couldn’t have a decent game of golf without agreeing that anyone who starts hacking the competition with swords or axes might well live but he will never be respected as a golfer.”
When we think of Conservative or Liberal we general think of freedoms that the citizens have.  Iceland is often touted as a very ‘free’ country but it has to be remembered that comparison of countries is difficult without consideration of the countries make up.  Iceland is a white tribe whereas both Turkey and the US are nations of many different racial and political groups.  Mexico its a conglomerate of Indian groups plus the later European immigrants.
So ‘freedom for the people’ in general really took off in the 1800’s  with the American (1776)  and French  Revolution. The British Magna Carta (1215) before it had nothing to do with the peasants but rather challenged the divinity and authority of the king versus the barons.  This is like democracy itself which was developed by the ‘lords’ and ‘landowners’ of ancient Greece.  The Christian Suffragette movement extended the ‘vote’ to women like the American Civil War extended the ‘vote’ to blacks.  A key questions is always ‘who are the people’ and further ‘who can be the leader’.  In aboriginal society it was common for there to be ’slaves’ and for non tribe members to be considered ‘other than human’.  This is going on today in Canada where an immigrant Sihk is the defence minister of Canada but a US presidential candidate born in Canada is being questioned as whether or not he is an American.  Most nations in the world are highly restrictive, incredibly nationalistic, tribalistic and racist in this regard.   Some say that the Desert Spring of the Middleeast was the civil war and political uprising of the common people that was occurring 200 years later.
Moderation has described the way countries deal with dissent.  Some countries behead dissenting individuals while others jail them.  Others have a wide variety of means for individuals to be critical of their own government.  I’d personally be jailed or beheaded, I believe, in any other country but Canada where Justin Trudeau is our Prime Minister.  I don’t doubt either that Mr. Justin Trudeau would wish as Mr. Harper his predecessor might wish that ‘beheading of dissidents’ was a Canadian ‘custom’ given the rude criticism our extraordinary leaders are subjected to.   Canada has freedom of speech like England and like American.  Few Muslem countries are moderate in this way.
But yes there are very moderate individual Muslims. I know some who are outrageously radical.  They are living in the west because they do not believe they would do well in the countries they have left.  They are ‘cultural’ escapees. They have come to Canada for the freedom they didn’t experience in the Moslem culture in their home.  They prefer the freedoms and moderation and liberties in Canadian culture and they surely do not want Sharia Law or for the culture they left to become dominant in Canada or the west.  They are in many ways like the Puritan Christians who left England because of religious persecution by the State Religion of those who questioned the authority of the church leadership and wanted a more democratic religious church.  The authoritarianism of the Catholic church with the Pope gave rise to the religious wars that begat Protestant Christianity with is nationalist churches as well as it’s presbyterian and congregationalist churches.  Today the fastest growing community Christian churches are in many ways the most democratic with ministers selected by the congregation and voted on rather than being appointed top down by the centralized church authority.    Most Muslims I know  came to get away from the authorities and restriction there and love their new home. Commonly immigrants cite ‘corruption’ in their former countries and a desire to make a ‘new start’ in the country they are going to.  This doesn’t mean that there is no corruption here but the corruption is different and consequently there is more ‘opportunity’ here.  Not uncommonly there is movement back and forth with regard to economic refugees and whole classes of individuals like the ‘gypsies’ who reject national boundaries all together to the great consternation of those most invested in national boundaries. Indeed the countless trade agreements these days is a direct consequence of the entrenching corruption associated directly with ‘boundaries’.
My Muslim friends here are more Canadian than I am in that regard to their appreciation of the freedoms we know in Canada. h.
I just regret that we all have had to look at the numbers and the risks that exist because our media so commonly is interested these days in selling war while some of our political leadership are most interested in selling to the lowest common denominator.
The result is lies.
There are a whole lot of radical muslems.  Wahhabism sect of the Sunni Muslem, preached as a central tenet of mainstream Saudi Arabia  are fundamentally anti freedom, anti western, anti secular, jihadist and commonly utterly disrespectful of other religions and cultures. The salafists are jihadist until proven otherwise.    The aim of these Muslems is world domination in the same way that Hitler and the Nazi’s were world domination or Stalin and the Communists.  To them Muslim is a religion of peace means quite simply when all the world is Muslim and "we are in charge” and “we have killed all who won’t convert”,  then we will have peace.
Most moderates believe in a balance of power.  Moderates respect respect  religious freedom. I love that I have Muslim neighbours, Buddhist neighbours, Hindu neighbours, Pagan neighbours, Jewish neightbours,  Christian neighbours and even atheist neighbours.  I like all the colours of the rainbow.  I love the diversity that we know in Canada.  I know there are those who want only to eat cereal for breakfast and insist everyone else eat cereal for breakfast like they do but I like choice.  I really am a big proponent of freedom and choice for individuals and communities.  I am a Canadian.  I like that I can joke with my moderate Muslim friends about ‘all roads leading to Rome’ but that Christians will have the better housing district and Muslims will have to live on the other side of the tracks.  They say they will have the virgins and I say I will have the music and maybe one virgin.  We don’t kill each other any more than I do with my female Buddhist friend who at the same time tells us men that she believes we will not get to heaven in the next life but rather will reincarnate as pigs.  To which my Hindu friend insists that he was a pig in a previous life and that’s where he learned his bad habits.  My Catholic friend loves bacon but doesn’t like this talk of pigs.  She rejects Jews and Moslems because she love her bacon.  And such a conversation among friends can occur in Canada among a group of deeply spiritual and religious individuals who are moderates.  I don’t know any fanatics.  I expect if I did I’d have to kill them before they killed me.  So as a Canadian I prefer peace because I can get on with science, loving, community and art rather than devoting myself to watching my back and killing the fanatics before they kill me.
I am a physician too.  Physicians commonly say ‘moderation in everything.’  So I like my moderate friends and am skeptical of my extremist friends.  I have no fanatic friends but I certainly have friends whose behaviours and thoughts are extreme by my personal rather conservative behaviour and thought. I am however most skeptical of those that lie especially politicians and the media. Lying people in power scare me.  Scaring people pushes them to  extremes.  I therefore wonder why some people in power who lie and deny legitimate concerns and threat are so anti moderation and in favour of war.  That concerns me. I’m less concerned about my moderate Muslim friends than I am about liars in general.   All my Muslim friends are equally concerned about radicals and extremists as I am.  None of my moderate Muslim academic doctor friends favour jihadists.  The moderate muslim psychiatrists I know think they’re psychopaths.  Why are our political leaders and their media not equally concerned?  That’s what concerns me? Indeed as my moderate muslim friends are against the fundamentalist and extremist muslims, those who don’t wish to integrate into Canadian society but rather wish to dominate and subjugate Canadian culture or isolate and plan jihad, then quite simply the enemy of my enemy is my friend.  Hence the Jordan pilot,a muslim, and the Kurdish women brigade, muslims, are my friends.
My concern is whether my leadership or their propaganda media are my friends?  I thank them only so far as their own violence has helped me clarify who are really the enemies of peace and the enemies of Canada and western secularism.

Pot Smoking Drama Teacher Trudeau offers to 'train' Canada's Military Allies

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As a dope smoking  drama teacher  Trudeau's immense ego surely blossomed when he   'critiqued'  Oscar Award Winning Dicaprio's Davros performance.  As DiCaprio is one of the Climate Change Cult out of his league among real scientists there was something amusing to these privileged boys sparring over hot air.     

It’s different though when Trudeau mocks the real hard work and scientific genius of the men and women in Canada's resource industry.  For a flakey light weight to suggest the really heavy lifter's of the Canadian economy are less than resourceful is a bit  much. 

But, if ridiculing hard working Canadians  isn't enough, his pulling our Military's planes out of the War against ISIS tops it all.   The Canadian air strikes specifically helped the modern Kurdish   women brigades  beat back the chauvinist ISIS savages, Mr. "It's 2015" Trudeau.

Pretty boy Trudeau's only claim to fame as a fighter is the  humiliating  staged photo op of him beating down an already beaten down aboriginal man.  Apparently politically this allowed him to show of his tough boy tattoo

The adults fighting in the middle east don’t need ‘training’ from Trudeau. Our allies needed planes,  equipment, weapons,  ammunition and men and women who come with that equipment and are Canada's real  fighters  The stupidity of Canadian media and Canadians collectively is that they think the battle hardened  fighters like the Kurdish women brigades, already winning against ISIS need Trudeau to 'train' them.  

I feel sorry for the new defence minister who, ever obedient to his superiors as any good soldier is, makes excuses for this pompous leader.  

Rather than more utter nonsense about sending a ‘training mission’  to Canada's NATO allies  Trudeau  should just admit that Canada’s new world role will be as troop ‘entertainment’.   Maybe after Sophie has a much needed training session from Justin Bieber, he could send her to sing for the Kurdish women fighting brigades. 

Simon Fraser University Pipe Band Robbie Burns Dinner

Thanks to Anne Lindsay, a rare Scottish lass of great wit, I was introduced to my first Robbie Burns dinner and have been going ever since.  Every one is the same and everyone is different.  The best is the Piping in of the Haggis and the hilarious Ode to the Haggis.
Last year Lorne Kay and I were at the Simon Frazer Burns Dinner. Lorne is a great fan of their pipe band and took me to their Tattoo some decades back. When I solo sailed my Folkes sailboat one winter across the Pacific to Hawaii I loved having along a Simon Fraser Pipe Band CD I played full volume one day when the boat and myself needed some uplifting.
This night we introduced my two Scottish origin friends, Dr. George Chalmers and Jane Fairbairn to the sacred inner circle of Burns Supper fans.  My brother and his family were dressed in Hay Tartan kilts enjoying the Robbie Burns Haggis in Ottawa while we were a few hours behind enjoying ours.  My friend Laura, with her own Scottish Heritage, was again enjoying another Ode to Haggis.  She doesn’t like Haggis but she loves the Simon Frazer Pipe Band and Highland Dancers.
A wonderful night.  At our table we had a man from Edinburgh whose accent was royal.  We also had a man from the Hebrides who told us of his stone house and the hundred other people who lived on the island.  There’s not much more Scottish than that.  The night had George reminiscing about his Scottish uncles and aunts growing up. Jane had done her masters at Simon Fraser and loved being back among some of the alumni.  I am really thankful that I could pass on to George and Jane what Anne once shared with me.  Every year I enjoy the evening even better.
I just love the haggis.  This night of haggis is as close to mass as the secular can come.  I feel all saintly and purified after I’ve had the rich feast of guts and cereal.
The silent auction raises money for the Band which continues win world championships.  What a night!  What royal music! And tremendous dance.
Thank You Simon Fraser Pipe Band.  I had tears in my eyes listening to you.

Vancouver Boat Show, 2016

I love the Vancouver Boat Show. I’ve been coming for 25 years and it just gets better and better. When I first began coming I’d bought a Folkes 40 foot  Steel Sailboat and was delighted to be able to compare prices for all the accessories I’d eventually have. My Folkes would eventually take me to Alaska, Mexico and I’d winter sail solo San Francisco to Hawaii.  I’m still sailing but thanks mostly to West Marine, and Stevenstons and other suppliers at the Vancouver Boat Show I have outfitted my boat three times over and don’t need anything for it right now. The last couple of years I’ve bought dinghies and Honda Outboards and Generators.
The only thing I’m in the market for right now is a scuba diving ‘snorkel’.  West Marine has one. It’s an 80 foot  hose which attaches to an air compressor which floats on a tube on the surface while you swim 60 feet down alone or with a partner. Having all the scuba gear, wet and dry suits I’ve found  the weight and paraphernalia tedious with age.  20 years ago I saw this compressor at the Vancouver Boat Show and haven’t seen it since. I’ve often regretted not buying it because I got my scuba licenses first to be able to untangle anchors and lines around the prop offshore sailing. Scuba diving took on a life of it ’s own and I became a Rescue Diver and trained as a Master diver. I loved scuba diving but eventually like black diamond skiing I got older and lost interest.  I’d still like to be able to swim deep and spear fish and untangle props and anchors but I don’t want to carry air tanks so this is the possible solution.  They’re on line but I don’t want to buy it on line sight unseen.  I don’t know how it will work with my dry suit and really want to see one before I commit thousands of dollars.
That’s the joy of the Boat Show.  l’ve also been hankering after what I call a water motorcycle. I’d looked at SeaDoos last year and thought they’d advanced to being a really useful craft.  When I first rode one at a resort in the pacific I thought they were a toy but not very useful. Now they’ve made them sturdier and people are actually commuting Vancouver to Bowen Island and back on them.  Both Sea Doo and Yamaha Wave Rider make this model which allows you to remain dry while riding too and from work.
This Boat Show I was truly privileged to learn every question I could ever have about the Yamaha Wave Riders from a brilliant young technician for Yamaha.  I’d not even considered a Yamaha though I have had a Yamaha motorcycle and love my Yamaha Quad.  So looking for the Seadoo I came across this young fellow who literally took me through the range of products that Yamaha has telling me all the advantages of each of the products, what they could do and what features each had.  It was a marvellous learning experience.  The young man was a technician and not a salesman but I never knew a young man to love engines and performance like him.  I was able to discuss the Wave Rider engine in comparison with my Harley Davidson motorcycle and know that this fellow knew exactly what he was talking about.  It was all I could do to resist buying this one particular Wave Rider right there.
I looked at the Sea doo after and while they had some features  I liked still,  the Yamaha seemed better made , sleeker, and with lovely hidden cleats and hidden tow lines, fine lines and performance details.   The seadoo was rugged and the helpful salesman also answered my questions. That’s the beauty of the boatshow.  This same Canadian company makes the Bombardier and the much loved Spider Trike.   Mostly thanks to the Boat show I was able to compare and consider purchases that I will likely make in the next year or two if Canadian money retains any value and I can justify spending on a vehicle I could clearly use for commuting, fishing and transporting me up streams to hunting areas.  I have a terrific little pontoon boat but my friend and I considered how much better it would be if we each had a water craft out hunting like two guys with quads.  We have the communication gear for working two areas but there’s a whole lot of fun involved in being able to travel alone. Of course I could take a girl and a dog on the back of a water mobile too.
I don’t need another boat.  The Vancouver Boat Show is a place to dream. The fact is I’d never have got the 30 hp Honda and the hard bottomed AFB were it not for seeing it at the Boat show and after a year of considering it, realizing it really was what I needed for fishing. It’s been a delight for fishing and a lot of fun hunting ducks too.
I don’t need a Sea Doo or Wave Rider. But I want one.
There were luxury yachts that movie stars might like but I’ve got a sailboat so I’ve not been looking at these so much. Every year I’ve lusted after a front loading landing craft that would allow one to take a quad in the boat and land it on an island.  Tom and I hunted an island last year and this would have been clearly the way to go. If one had a $160,000.  It’s worth every penny but not something I’ll be getting unless I win the lottery. But if i did that I’d probably get one of the luxury yachts there.
I loved running into Anthony Dalton, the famous adventure writer.(www.heritagehouse.ca)  He was there with other writers at the Marine books . We caught up on life and friends.  I’ve read a half dozen or more of his works and love his experience, detail and sensitivity.  HIs work on Polar Bears is a classic.  I hadn’t read his latest novel so now look forward to reading “Relentless Pursuit”.
The other delight of this show was meeting Neil Hamelin.(www.neilhamelin.com ) He’s an amazing marine artist and I simply loved his painting. Sailing the coast as much as I have I saw he captured the West Coast Maritime like Emily Carr captured the forest. There was love in his work and it was a joy to meet him.   (I'm sorry I chopped off his head in the picture with the new 'live' feature in the iPhone plus.
Of course there were shoes and every other fashion known to the boat world there.  I’ve got the Mustang Off Shore gear and loved browsing through the latest expedition clothing.
It’s just such a great place to see everything all under one room.  It’s the best place for deals as I’ve got so doozies in years past.  Somehow I got out without buying Sea Doo or Yamaha Wave rider.  But I know I got my Harley Electraglide after I fell in love with one at the Vancouver Motorcycle Show, having my picture taken on it and never believing I’d ever be able to own one.  I had a HD Roadster at the time.  Thanks to God’s Grace I found a second hand Electraglide at Trev Deely a couple of years later and am so glad I didn’t miss that deal.  That bike has brought me so much joy. Now I’m thinking one day I may be the happy own of a water motorcycle.  You never know. It doesn’t hurt to dream.
All round a great show

 

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Canadian Politics and Economics

Canadian Economics

Let me explain.  I don’t claim to understand money well. It is a ‘spiritual energy’ like all ‘energies’. It’s dynamic and not something ‘fixed’.  It’s ‘fluid’. 

Canada is a rich country.  More Canadians are travelling and learning just how wealthy Canada is collectively.  I simply have never, ever, seen the poverty I have seen elsewhere in Canada and I have been in Canada’s most impoverished places. I have not been in the most impoverished places in the world. 

Like the very rich themselves I have complained about lack of money.  I have like billionaires do claimed ‘poverty’ among my friends. So much of wealth is ‘relative’.  So today because of the global media people who didn’t think they were poor think they are poor today whereas those who thought they were rich realize they don’t have the kind of resources a ‘mere’ actor like  DiCaprio does.  Because they are war lords and leaders of countries they want what the ‘hired help’ have in other countries. Much of what is defined as ‘money’ is ‘solidified envy’.

I have loved Canada’s freedoms.  Canadians who don’t travel take for granted our freedoms.  We can move about Canada quite freely. We can congregate freely. We have relative freedom of speech. We can criticize our government and leadership.  There isn’t a whole lot of political prisoners.  We have freedom of religion.  We are not subject to arrest without legal representation.  We can’t go missing ‘easily’.  We have the right to buy guns.  We have relatively ‘transparent’ government and courts. 

This is simply not the case in other major world countries.  Elsewhere people aren’t allowed to criticize their government.  A neighbour can tell the authorities that they overheard you criticizing your government and you can be arrested, pay huge fines, forfeit all property and lose your job. This happened routinely in Communist countries.  It happens routinely in Saudi Arabia. It happens surprisingly in countries like Thailand where a journalist criticizing a long dead royalty is still in prison.  In most countries around the equator, the so called ‘Bamboo Wall’  Christianity is daily persecuted.  You can be a Muslim in a Muslim Country but Jews and Christians are second class citizens with various taxes and restraints and can be arrested for promoting any religious idea that doesn’t sit well with the religious authorities.  Even in Hindu countries there are limits to what Christians can do.  Aetheists suffer well in non communist countries. Communist countries were aetheist and persecuted people of all religions generally.

Movement within the country and in and out of the country isn’t a ‘right’ but rather a ‘perk’ given to the rich and those ‘priviledged’ to have ‘special status’.  I was surprised when immigrants without disability began parking their cars in ‘wheelchair parking’ until it was explained to me by one such fellow that the ‘car’ has the ‘disability sticker’.  This was a ‘status’ matter and not a matter of ‘compassion’ where he came from. He’d paid for this ‘sticker’ for the rare occasions an elderly aunt was in the car. 

Wealth around the world, including in Canada is in the ‘control’, (not hands) of very few.  With the divide and conquer and playing one group against the other the ‘elite’ have succeeded in moving half the world wealth into the control of 86 individuals.  20 years ago there were several hundreds.  Centralization and totalitarianism have been a chronic ‘State versus the Individual” “Central versus Local power” debate and struggle for thousands of years. 

The internal structural nationstate world wide is of an elite , about 1 -2% of the overall population with it’s retainers and ‘muscle’.  These ‘retainers’ are the ‘government employees, principally tax collection’ and the ‘muscle’ is the military, lawyers, police and jails and social police , the lawyers, social workers and even the psychiatrists and psychologists and the asylums.  These form another approximately 10 % of the country.  Historically, these were the ‘landowners’ the medieval Kings and Lords and Ladies.  Subsequently the towns and artisans and traders developed a third of ‘middleclass’ sort of power.  These were associated with the rise of bankers.  Banks were the ‘hired help’ of the Elite just like the ‘muscle’ and the ‘tax collecting beurocrats’. 

This left the vast majority of the population relatively poor.  Rich are those who have an income of a half million or a million net or more.  The middle class could be said as those with an net income of $75000 to $250000.  It’s also worthwhile to consider ‘real income’. 

It’s critical here to distinguish ‘net’ from ‘gross’.  Net is the income after taxes and in business after ‘overhead’.  The Liberal Elite fighting the Doctors consistently published the Gross Income of Doctors showing some doctors making a ‘million dollars’.  They did the same when they were attacking farmers showing that farmers were ‘worth a million dollars”.  In both cases the average Canadian especially the most ignorant of the ‘muscle’ and the media made stupid masses didn’t understand that the doctor or the farmer.  

He made a million dollars gross had 3 staff, ran an office and operating theatre , fees, insurance costs and licenses and at the end of the day had a personal gross income of less than $200,000 which is considerably less than  Canadian government workers having an income of $200,000 in fact have more like $400,000 because of pensions, health care and various other ‘schemes’.  The doctor can’t ‘hide’ his income like other businessman, a restaurant with losses etc so he’s taxed 50% on his income and walks home with $100,000.  He is supposed to be grateful and would be if he didn’t have to work for entitled wealthy beaurocrats whose attitudes are ‘toxic’ to creativity and are a net drain on the productivity of any country.  Government is ‘restrictive’ and serves primarily to restrict the population and ensure maximal profit for the elite without rebellion.  That’s the ‘balance’ without ‘rebellion’, ‘strike,’ and yet ‘work to rule’ is the norm in massively centralized countries like China and increasingly Canada.

As a physician I have never made ‘minimum wage’.  I have forfeited 12 years of next to no income for the sake of higher education, then worked anywhere from a minimum of 60 hours a week to 120 hours a week a year with requirments like 50 hours educational work a year to maintain increasingly expensive licenses and increasingly outrageous insurance to address the ‘white collar crime’ of the ‘ambulance chaser’ and the ‘legal lottery insurance schemes’.    The cost of ‘social law’ in Canada can never be underestimated explaining why lawyers are the next richest group compared to bankers while increasingly the ‘productive’ and ‘creative’ professions (engineering, medicine, architecture, military officer class, clergy etc) gain less and less.    Canada has indeed increasingly become like Communist Countries more a ‘legal theocracy’ than an actual democracy.  The power of the executive appointed court in Canada has centralized power in the last 20 years more than anything ever considered ‘Canadian.”

The farmer who has a million dollars has all that tied up in land and equipment so at the end of the day may well be living on $10,000 because he is “land rich and money poor’.  Most business people are this way and have to forfeit individually early wealth for later gain especially as they fight the Canadian beaurocracy that through taxes and interference makes it more difficult than some third world countries for a business to be successful. This is a sharp contrast to the US , which builds walls to keep people out, because it is in contrast to Canada , truly the ‘land of opportunity’ with 50% of the millionaires in that country self made in a lifetime.

In other countries there is highly limited social mobility.  Social mobility is the ability to move from one class to another.  In England the ‘Royalty’ and the ‘Upper Classes’ are established by generations of inbreeding.  In India they only recently removed their Apartheid Class System with it’s ‘Untouchables’  not dissimiliar to the colour coded Apartheid System of South Africa.  Most African nations like the Aboriginal Communities of Canada are family based Tribal Chieftain wealth. If your family member is in power then you can benefit from this essential ‘cronyism’. The province of Quebec has a long history of inter related ‘cronyism’ and indeed a recent Charbanneaux Commission declared that most of the country’s political construction   spending was Mafia and Biker Gang Base.

The original Tribal leadership is called ‘ the strong man’ dictatorship.  This tribal arrangement is the basis of Biker Gangs and the Mafia.  The Federation is a group of Strong Men. This is the Communist Politburo which is essentially a ‘dictatorship of the proletariat”. and is the Oligarchy of Russia now lead by Putin and the Tycoon businessmen around him and the military and KGB.

Marx said ‘religion is the opiate of the masses’.  Religions only exist as they ‘support the STATE’ hence they were outlawed by Aetheist Communist Countries and State Religions like Anglicanism or the Church of England always support central authority because that’s where the money is.

Where the money is as a ‘spiritual energy’    “Follow the money trails’ is the fundamental approach to understand “Power Politics”.

Democracy is a system where by the ‘voting’ of leadership is given to the ‘election’ process however this is ‘manipulated’ by ‘big media’ and by ‘ballotting process’ and by ‘party systems’ and by principally ‘government making ‘promises’ but not following through with increasing ‘protections’ and various movements by ‘government’ to ‘vote itself high salaries’ and ‘to vote itself perk’s and to have all manner of ‘institutional corruption’. Washington ‘law maker’s” are notorious the world around for making laws that apply to everyone else but not to Washington DC.  Ottawa is similar. Leaders the world around want to have ‘priviledges’ and are hypocrites.  Noone is more ‘hypocritical’ than the average  politician today.  Hypocricy is the very business of politics.   Politics hasn’t always been this way because historically it was more ‘tribal’ and less ‘entrenched’. 

The principle lie of politics today is ‘CHANGE’.  All that is changed in modern democratic politics is one self seeking self serving party is replaced by another self seeking self serving party. This was an old tactics of the Kings. Kings remained with their rich loyal followers but prime ministers and such changed.  Economically the government always protected the “ELITE”. 

This is not ‘conspiracy’ theory, but simple government 101. 

Indeed the “ELITE”  as they don’t ‘hold money’ but rather ‘control’ it may in fact be the ‘best leaders the world can have.’  Historically a ‘benign dictatorship’ was considered the best government because all the others were ‘messy’ and ‘corrupt’ and ‘increasingly’ ineffecient’ whereas ‘benigh’ or ‘enlightened ‘ leadership was a good thing. Unfortunately because of in breeding and the need for ‘competition’ since ‘invention is essentially the mother of necessity we have seen that countries like Saudi Arabia are increasingly ‘muscle bound’ but incredibly ‘stupid’.  That’s the drugs and alcohol and play life of royalty the world over. 

Change then occurs through ‘revolution’ in these highly centralized countries whereas in democracies and in monetary  based western societies there’s been a capacity for ‘change’ to occur historically without the need for wasteful war. 

It's critical to understand that there is leadership by a very few and that concentration of power and wealth has occurred. This is not necessarily bad or evil.  Indeed Biblical Christians support good leadership and believe that God works through leaders.  Even the Beatles sang, "We don't want a revolution.".

"Identification with the Aggressor' is the psychological defence where people say 'If you can't beat them, join them."  At it's extreme we see the "Stockholm Syndrome'.

"Healthy skepticism has always been considered the best approach to government especially one which is actively desiring to be in the business of a 'recreational drug dealler' for the sake of taxes which will pay for the increasing amount that governments pay themselves and their friends.

Muslim Migrants and "Terrorist Deniers"

I’ve been reactive to the ignorance I’ve perceived around the Muslim migrant issues.  I have been ridiculed, verbally abused and maligned, bullied and called names such as Racist and Islamaphobe because I’ve expressed concern. I have been told by many of my friends that they are afraid to speak up because of the bullying.
1. I’m using this time to learn about Islam.  I have the privilege and honour to know many Muslims who have been friends, mentors and teachers. However, these have generally been highly educated upper middle class people who are not representative of the “masses’.  Given there are billions of Muslims I’ve been learning the divisions of the Muslim religion.   I’m appalled that the CBC journalists and Liberal leaders who are so quick to label everyone other than themselves racist don’t seem to know the different between Sunni, Shii, Ismaeli and Suffi. CBC, instead of doing a piece on Ataturk the Secular Muslem who created Turkey out of the Ottoman Empire continues to ignore the fears of modern Istanbul inhabitants about the Moslem Brotherhood. Were CBC to be journalists of a world calibre they would know these thing but instead being ignorant would quite likely label all Turkey’s muslims ‘racist’ because right now Turkey is struggling to maintain it’s secular Ataturk state against the encroachment of the Muslem Brotherhood.
2.  The Liberals, so called ‘leftists’ and repressive are encouraging war by calling all discussion of Islam ‘hate speech’ and “islamophobia’.  Here in Canada people who use the word ‘terrorist’ are at risk because ‘freedom of speech’ is no longer part of daily discourse. If a person says a Muslim person raped a teen ager he is considered ‘racist’.  But it’s equally alright to talk about the ‘White Christian Terrorists’ presently defending the Constiution in Oregon. This will naturally cause war which seems the aim of the west as it has chosen sides and is attacking those who raise valid concerns. This ‘favouritism’ in the Liberal is like a parent who chooses one kid arguing over another rather than truly being moderate and learning more than ‘side choosing’ and ‘blaming’. The ‘blaming’ of the Liberal Media of ‘whites’ and the ‘west’ and ‘ancient history’ is ‘hate speech’.  It’s not contributing to identifying those groups of Muslims, the radicals and the fundamentalists who quite frankly hate western women and gays.  They would kill them.  We as Christians acknowledge that the Westboro Baptists are ‘extreme’ so we can all get along and don’t have to call each other racist for thinking that the United Church of Canada or Methodists or especially Mennonites aren’t particularly frightening.
3. Sociologists know that if you move large masses of migrants into any nation there will be all manner of social problems. Denying this is dangerous.  Merkel, Obama and Trudeau are by their definitions ‘Social Deniers’. ndeed if the Merkels cabal in Germany had prepared the German people for Sharia Law many of the abuses of the Germans could have been planned for.  Part of the vetting and acceptance of Migrants could well have hinged on accepting only those who accepted that men and women have equal status before the law and violence against women and gays is unacceptable in western Christian countries.  It’s no different than telling barbarians to not shit in the living room. There’s nothing ‘racist’ about expecting everyone to follow the laws.  However, Leftist Liberals don’t want this. They want to have a law for them and their ‘designated victim’ statuses and a law for the rest.  Right now they choose Palestinians over the Jews whereas last decade the flavour of the month was Jews over the English.
4.  Trudeau introduced the idea of accepting ‘all refugees’ to Canada to a large degree regardless of their criminal or mental illness history.  Prior to Trudeau immigration had preferences for the educated and those who would be needed in Canada.  It’s like Nigeria opening it’s doors to American immigration only to be shocked that Red Neck Klu Klux Klan start killing the blacks of Nigeria.  This is the state of affairs with citizens and their governments here.  Canada and Canadians and Americans have always been more accepting of immigration and refugees and foreigners than most countries represented by the barbaric United Nations. The true racism in most countries of the United Nations is difficult to access in it’s entirety because most countries in the United Nations don’t have civil rights and  have state injustice beyond anything Americans and Canadians can conceive of.
5. Donald Trump would not be saying no to Immigrants is Obama wasn’t ignoring terrorism and unwilling to call terrorists terrorists and blaming ‘gun laws’ on terrorism rather than facing the risks to americans of an un vetted large scale immigration from where ISIS reigns.  Further, Obama ignoring Americans who are legal workers has encouraged ‘illegal’ immigrants.  My friends who are ‘legal’ immigrants are offended by this ‘favouritism’ of criminals. It’s the same as my objection to Trudeau smoking dope without consequences, indeed he has a large reward, when my friends have suffered horrendously for minor indiscretion. I appreciate his desire to decriminalize marijuana laws but it still burns me that there are two laws, one for the elite like Trudeau and one for the rest of us.  My ‘legal immigrant’ friends want to be paid back the $10,000 they paid to get into the country because now there are a whole bunch of ‘illegal immigrants’ who are being ‘pardoned’ and not being required to pay.  I want my friends and I to be paid the millions compensation by the state that the marijuana laws caused us the people us to lose,  since the elite were rewarded for their drug abuse and criminal behaviour.  So criminals are being rewarded all the time these days.  That’s the attraction of Donald Trump.  The left wing liberals and democrats don’t seem to believe the laws they make for everyone else should apply to them.  This is the corruption that is killing the west.
6. Canada had 10’s of thousands of Muslim Immigrants before Trudeau.  Trudeau created the anti muslim sentiment by the way he behaved.  He was disrespectful of peoples concerns after the Charlie Hebdo killing, after ISIS beheadings, the tens of thousands of school girls gang raped in Rotherham and across Europe, the increasing videos on the internet of Muslim gang violence against the europeans who were offering them sanctuary. No one wants to give to someone who ‘bites the hand that feeds them”.  No one wants to let a person who doesn’t know where to shit have free range of their kitchen and living rooms and bedrooms.  The ideologically driven rigid Trudeau was the worst authoritarian dictator unresponsive to the majority of Canadians now expressing concerns about “timing’ and ’numbers’.  People said ’slow down’ and suddenly liberals were calling them Racists.  The mature reasonable folk who are Canadians with many moslem, jewish, Christian, and Hindu and Sikh and atheist friends were being accused by these apparatchiks Stalins and their judgemental dictatorial media representatives of being something they simply were not.  Christians collectively aren’t racists and Canada is mostly a Christian country.  Muslim countries persecute Christians every day.  Today Christians were beheaded . No Muslim is being beheaded in Canada today. Don’t lie.  Stop fabricating false comparisons.The Crusades were the 'defence' against Caliphate Muslim invasions a thousand years ago.  Today a Muslim Terrorist group invaded Christian territory and killed Christians.  Today.  Now.
7. My Muslim friends are concerned about Trudeau’s ignorance about Muslims and the Middleeast. Does he want 'honour killing' here in Canada.  Liberals objected to the laws against 'barbaric practices' which were put forward by Moslem and Indian women.  They were called racist for objecting to the removal of the 'clitoris' of girls.  By contrast 'circumcision' done properly is a small slice along the outer lips of the glans major.  Upper class moslems accept the later whereas lower class Muslims promote the further.  Jews and others 'genitally mutilate' boys, i.e. circumcision but it would be a wholly different thing if boys had their penis's removed rather than just a tag of foreskin. But the Liberals by contrast are promoting 'barbaric practices' which the enlightened of these cultures escaped to Canada to get away from.  The further fact is Sunni Muslems have killed a whole lot of Shii Muslems and all mainstream Muslems are frankly very cautious about radical Muslems because Radical Muslems kill more Muslems than anyone else.  So why is Trudeau so apparently stupid?  Is this why so many Canadians are objecting to the lack of education in the Canadian school system because the teachers seem so ignorant about history, geography and reading, writing and arithmetic but promote all manner of ideology like the worst Imans of the east.  Why can’t CBC journalists do their homework and become knowledgeable about Muslims instead of creating divisiveness with ignorance.  Why is Obama not listening to Muslims? Why do the Liberals want war.  Because this is the way Hitler started WWII. It's also the justification that Stalin used to invade many eastern countries.  Then it was ‘race’ and ‘culture’ whereas now it is ‘culture’ and ‘religion’ . Ironically the old ‘racism’ hate slur continues to be bandied about. Yet lots of buddhists are 'brown' and no one objects to 'brown' race 'Buddhists' immigrating to Canada.

8. There are good Muslims and bad Muslims. There are a whole lot of in between Muslims.  If the leadership of my country and the news wasn’t so ignorant we would not have to stoop to their level of discussion.  Right now Muslims are being allowed to pray in our school whereas Christians are not.  What better way to start war!
9.That frankly is the concern of all us peaceniks, that Trudeau and Obama and Merkel are two faced actors who are representative of the Elite who make the most money and have the most power through war.  The UN is a nation of war lords and I frankly don’t want more government because we’ve all seen the hundreds of millions killed by the totalitarian communist atheist central government empires.  Before that we had the WWI war to end all wars between Western war lords while in the east and middle east they had their own sets of wars by war lords.  In all these wars it’s not the Elite that lead but us the people.  So if Muslim migrations are for the benefit of the people, for assimilation and integration rather than creation of ghettos and sharia law states then great. But so far here in Canada Trudeau and the Liberals have been little better than Merkel and her cabal of ideologues. One asks then how many Canadian women will be gang raped and how many of us will be caught in terrorists bombs and how many gays will be killed before Trudeau is less arrogant than his famously arrogant father.

Politics, Meditation and Mental Illness

Politics is defined as the art or science of influencing government policy. I’ve always been surprised by the term ‘science’ in relationship to politics but political science is defined as ‘the social science discipline that deals with the systems of government and the analysis of political activity and behaviour. ‘  A scientific study did show that voting was influenced by sunny versus rainy days. That’s good science.
 All aspects of psychology, marketing and logic and rhetoric go into the ‘power game’ of ‘politics’.  Indeed war was considered the last act of diplomacy.  So politics might include nuking the enemy when all else fails.  It’s not a particularly ‘ethical’ or ‘moral’ field if one views history.  Politics has been part of the social behaviour of cannibals and the Amish.  Nazis and Tibetans have politics.
I’d hazard to say that Meditation, the reflection on God or oneness or breath, alone, by oneself, is perhaps the exact opposite of politics.
Monasteries have major political disputes once two monks get together in a cell.  Lovers are fine until the government of bed enters the equation as in ‘whose going to make the bed.'
I’ve had moments of mental illness when I’ve become involved in politics personally. I vote. I contribute money to political parties.  But rarely have I actually got involved in ‘governance.’  I’ve been a ship’s captain and keeping a crew from mutinying when they are frightened has taken all my moral reserve.  Marriage has had me thinking ‘all’s fair in love and war’.
To this end I appreciate the irony and difficulty involved in herding cats and humans.
Lovely studies like the “experiments’  show that most people will devolve quickly to murderous behaviour despite all their pollyanna high minded spiels of peace and good will.
All around the world there are clear and evident examples of the masses of people and large groups acting poorly given half  a chance.  What’s actually miraculously  quite abnormal is to see people acting well.  Those who think it is our ‘nature’ to be love children are to my mind, the most mentally ill, delusional, and likeliest to project their murderous rage on their neighbour.  (They’re commonly attracted to the left wing which generally lacks standards so celebrates inclusivity and later gets into difficulty justifying pedophiles in their midst).
Our closest animal neighbour is the chimpanzee and ask the peaceful rhesus monkey how it likes living beside these fellows when they have a hankering for monkey brain. Even the peace and love bonobos who share equal DNA with chimps and man aren't loathe to kill other primates in a political way.  So, for the mentally ill among us, killing is a ‘natural’ human trait.
However in the war research of “On Killing”,  by Lt Col Dave Grossman, he has noted that collections of humans range from very good killers to not very good killers.  Robert Hare the forensic psychologist has specifically looked at psychopaths and sociopaths.  My favourite Sgte Major described his own killing propensity as “I don’t like killing other humans but there are wolves and I’m like a sheep dog.  The wolves want to kill the sheep and I want to protect the sheep. Killing wolves follows from that."
We are living in a time when the sheep baaas and blatting have loud speakers called media and internet.  The mentally ill deny their capacity for killing but are noted to enjoy the benefits of having killers among them.  Presidents and Prime Ministers who are associated with  the most violent of all, the ruling elites, (the billionaires, the tyrants, the democratic leaders, UN leaders, etc) all would disarm their populations while reserving the right to be surrounded by gun toting secret service and secret armies.  Rarely are these men and women armed themselves so that they can maintain the lie.  It’s always best that others don’t know your riches. Weapons have always been like gold.  Bankers love to have lots of folk with major weapons protecting them.
So I did my time when younger, serving as secretary, vice presidents, and presidents and leaders in various organization.  All my life I’ve been a member of churches and community organizations ‘volunteering’, but not particularly enjoying it.
The nature of my work is people in conflict.  I’ve trained extensively in the politics of groups and family and individuals psychopathology.  I’ve watched corruption permeate unions and administrations.  I’ve had my life threatened and my family threatened when I’ve been effective in curtailing abuse.
Most activists are irrelevant.  They are predominantly distractions.  When the rubber hits the road, money is defended by weapons.  Those who threaten wealth will be threatened. I tell political folk if you aren’t being ridiculed, threatened and demonized and called ‘mentally ill’ then most likely you are helping and enabling the very people you claim to be against.
The thing that all political scientists will tell you is that politics is complex.  Science is ‘multi factorial’.  I loved to play chess. It was the fundamental game to teach leaders politics and war. There are moves within moves.
I got distracted by politics this fall.  Normally I’m trying to keep my head down.  Canada is a terrifying country when you question authority.  It may be the least terrifying country to question authority in or it may be the most deceitful. I belonged to a group called the “psychiatrists against the political abuse of psychiatry’.  When one questions the killer elite (that 1-2% of society that hold power by force) one is imprisoned in a jail or an asylum.  In Canada as opposed to China, Russia, Saudi Arabia or Argentina, political dissidents are rarely killed. They are usually ‘discredited’, and lastly put in jail or asylum. I was for a time a member of Physicans Against Nuclear War, Human Rights Association and the Canadian Civil Liberties.  I have been frankly humbled and terrified by state power and frankly quite ashamed of my own cowardice and how little I tolerate pain and how easily truth can be discarded by the authorities who actually will tell you “we make the truth’.
Since my own “close encounter’ I have worked with torture victims and refugees from countries where the authorities are more heavy handed than here. I know most Canadians don’t know what they’re talking about. I have friends who ‘whisper’ still despite being in Canada for 20 years.  It’s something I’ve yet to learn. That’s what’s so different about Canada.  
So I’ve really avoided ‘politics’.  Friends who knew me for causing student rebellions and overturning university magazines with acid tongued satire and political writing haven’t recognized me in recent years. I’m a coward. That’s the difference. I’m no longer innocent and I certainly don’t want to be a fool. There’s no ‘one bad man’.  Modern times are a cowboy show. There’s not ‘good guys and bad guys’.  It’s all a bit grey. The war of words is covered by the ‘fog of war’ just like the real war zone is.  The evil is a ‘nest of men and women’ who are paranoids.
I stopped believing in the left or the right having any true distinction because the ‘elite’ will use whichever political system gives it the most control.  I’ve actually begun to think they’re ready to shaft religion too for the ultimate power of ‘one world order’.
My main dialogue is with God.  While I know God works through people and all of that I personally believe my focus needs to be on the transcendent. I belong to an organization that discourages even ‘righteous anger’ . But having decided a law degree would only help me with increased materialistic wealth, as the courts today are solely about money, and they’ve become a legal theocracy above all else, I thought I’d study for a master of divinity.  I had done a ll the ecumenical studies in Christianity and extensive comparative religious studies and world religion studies.  I was arguing more with God and yet having faith in God’s love.  I worried about arguing with my parents because they’d just send me to my room. When I was married my wife would always win arguments with bedroom violence, the siege techniques of the headaches. It became obvious that no matter how ‘right’ I was others were more prone to covert aggression and less interested in the truth.
I loved books, like Brothers Karamazov, King Lear, the Gospel, The Torah, the Bhagat va Gita, the Koran, Thus Sayest Zarusthra, Franny and Zoe, Yogananda, Of Human Bondage, William James, Das Kapita,  For years I’d study chemistry in the day and read the great tombs of literature in the evening. My wife at the time was a party girl and found my interest in book stores and intellectuals rather offensive.  She liked light hearted chatter with agreeing girlfriends and family and avoided dialogue having come I’d later learn from a violent home where alcohol and fists ruled.
I have known always that homicide or suicide don’t win an ‘argument’.  The person who does either ‘loses the debate’, simply because I don’t believe in death.  I also believe if I wanted to be a killer I could be a better killer than anyone I’ve met. Which is why I became a doctor because it’s much harder to revive someone than it is to destroy them. My colleagues are still working on a cure for radiation poisoning.  I’ve become adept at healing PTSD and really did a lot for people with head injury when no one else found these groups ‘sexy’ or ‘lucrative’.  I’m less interested now that i know more colleagues who are superior clinicians in Neuropsychiatry and some of the great military psychiatrists are finally getting their due for their research in PTSD.  There’s an irony that head injury research had to wait funding not for all the soldiers but for the hockey players and football players to appear to have concerns.
But personally my argument is with God.
My brother developed cancer this spring. He’s a young man. I was with my mom and dad when they were growing old and dying.  My brother’s cancer is to my mind a product of the stress he’s faced being a good man in this country of Canada. He’s the best man I know.  He was my big brother and protected me from bullies. We went to boy scouts together.  We canoed. We hiked, We hunted.  My dad and he and I and a dog were a ‘unit’ in the woods together. Fishing mom would come along in the boat but hunting it was just us three with my brother watching over me. Later he’d join the Billy Graham Movement, a really high minded man who was a leading academic and great sports man.  He’s still playing hockey. He has been married all his life it seems to a beautiful brilliant woman and the  two have had the most incredible brilliant sons all really smart fine people, engineer, geologist, psychologist. They’re hilarious and help out and work together.  They’re a Canadian style Salvador Dali Rockwell Family painting in a Group of Seven backdrop. .
I believe my brother’s cancer is a product of the stress its’ become for good people to be good and do good work in Canada today.”  It wears one down.
I’m in Vancouver where there’s a criminal every  block. The principle economy was drug dealing. There’s gangs and killings and it’s all packaged for tourists like some pretty place where everyone is ‘pretty’.  Yet the principal housing market has been dominated by offshore money which we hear by and by has come from factories run by killing workers or by communist gang theft or simple off shore graft.
My brother and I were in boy scouts.  I loved the movie “The Last Boy Scout”.
As a family we recently watched Star Wars together.  Notice these themes that appeal to the ‘underdogs’.
Politically I got pissed off after my brother got cancer.  I have watched health care funding in Canada plummet and our hospitals become dominated by whack jobs.  We have 20 times the administration of Germany with its equivalent if not superior medical care.  Every doctor including myself lives in fear of political interference.  We are told by lawyers to avoid drawing attention to ourselves. We are literally told to do the least for patients. Our political apparatchiks tell us the patient is the ‘customer’.  I am punished for doing more never for doing less.
So then some wanker calls me a “Climate Change Denier”.  This moron calls me ‘psychotic’ because that’s what ‘denial’ is. He says I’m not a scientist because I’m tired of pseudoscientists from the Silent Spring book, to the Ozone layer, then Methane Layer, Global Freezing, to Global Warming, to now Climate Change Fraud demanding money from real science for this attempt at making the UN a one world order and Agenda 21 the halcyon call for the killer elite of tyrant countries at the UN where freedom of speech, freedom of religion and freedom of science are literally outlawed.  In all these racist sexist  UN countries there are scientists like Gallileo rotting in jails.  The Saudis and the Thais arrest anyone who questions the divinity of the king.  The Saudis behead them.
Now our government has given a few billion dollars to the UN wankers and the Climate Change Cult has spent a trillion and a half on bogus ‘save the planet’ bs, meanwhile I’ve watched medicine cure AIDS, erase epidemics, counter schizophrenia. It’s been a miracle after miracle working in the world of real science. We’ve put people on the moon and are sending people to Mars soon. We have lazer surgery and have extended life expectancy and cured countless baby deforming disease in the womb. We, the real scientists, are daily faced with government restrictions because the politicos want committee meeting after committee meeting to discus their coffee breaks.  All the while I guess I see my brother having a curable disease, a mere cancer and I’m wanting all that bogus waste of money in the Climate Change Cult budget going where it needs to go, the cure of cancer.
So I went ballistic when Justin Trudeau won and took a 380 friend multi million victory party to Paris and  gave billions of dollars to the UN tyrants and killers for their bogus pseudoscience scam Climate Change.
Meanwhile I work each day with heroin and cocaine addicts whose pushers are driving ferrari’s and the police are unable to catch them because of the corruption in our legal system that allows drug dealers and their rich political friends to get around the law. Meanwhile I live in fear like every other Canadian that I will make any mistake because I know that the police will have a swat team on me and the Revenue Canada will freeze my accounts and send in a mob of consulting accountants if I make even the tiniest mistake,Meanwhile criminals and drug dealers and lying climate change cultists and fat cats galore get away with rank evil.
I don’t do well with politics any more. I have a flashing ‘suicide/homicide sign in my head and begin thinking of gassing myself and setting myself on fire because the sheer stupidity and corruption of the system sickens me.  Meanwhile I share on face books because I keep thinking I can wake up cabbages.
But we’re all really happy slaves.  Well fed.
One is mentally ill to question authority in Canada. One is perhaps even more mentally ill if one doesn’t at some time question God. Atheists might do well to question themselves.
Now the Muslim Migrants en mass are coming and I’m flash backing to the sheer terror I lived in during the IRA bombings in London and I know Justin Trudeau doesn’t care.  The elite are protected. They live here in West Vancouver. They don’t live in Kitsilano or Richmond, or even Shaughnassey. They certainly don’t live in the Downtown Eastside.
They have lear jets and howitzers and helicopters and private armies and if they get cancer they go to Swiss Clinics and Mayo and thankfully there is ‘trickle down science’ and we learn from the cures that they get for their cancer.
My brother is getting great care and the cutting edge in cancer treatment.  My parents had great medical care. Our family has had really good medical care. And I’m just afraid.  My Prime Minister is offering us marijuana and physician assisted suicide. I’m past retirement age but like all north americans we’re being told that we can’t afford to retire. I don’t want to retire. I just thought I’d have this trade and be able to practice this trade called ‘medicine’ wherever I went.It’s like a carpenter but now there’s a baurocratic tollgate for every action i take. there’s a tax on using the outhouse.
So I’m frustrated. I think the government is throwing money away on cronyism and not addressing the real issues. So I got involved in politics. I became a ‘critic’.  I’m spiritually supposed to be celebrating the positive and ignoring the negative.  I just can’t see any positive. It’s my perspective.
I don’t like being a critic. I like to sing Kumbaya and have group hugs and put my head in the sand like an ostrich. I like to meditate. I like to be  a hermit. I’m happiest alone in Canada’s north with a trailer a truck and a rifle and a dog. I occasionally like others for brief periods.
I like helping people, healing, know my chemistry and pharmacology but mostly like to watch ‘relationship therapy’ in action.  As my lawyer friend said, I saw you become a doctor and thought that if you can get through school so could I. Now I watch addicts and alcoholics stop drinking and drugging figuring if a loser like me can get through life without smoking cigarettes or smoking dope or getting drunk or shooting up, maybe they can.  I have far more pleasure and joy than the average person. i’m blessed beyond any desert I have. I’m grateful for the impossible mercy of the universe. I’m in love with life at times. I’m thankful to be human.  I know so much depends on perspective. I see the effects of my patients depression and mania on the same situation.  I know these things.
But I don’t like politics. I don’t like playing the critic even if I know it’s a game. I don’t think I’d like killing the enemy but I’d be a damn good sheep dog.
Right now we’re in a war of words.  We’re losing.  So much we took for granted like ‘freedom of speech’ is gone.  We have massive propaganda and marketing budgets keeping us collectively stupid. There is a conspiracy. It’s call the Elite or the state and you. I knew Reagan was an actor so I didn’t mind if he was a puppet at times. He was a believable puppet. Justin Trudeau is a high school acting student. He’s just not believable.  His insincerity is so transparent. I have to give him credit he’s trying.   I would rather celebrate the good guys but frankly I don’t see any yet on the other side. it’s not that our Prime Minister is so bad but it’s that ‘this is the best we as Canada can produce’, a high school teacher with a winning name and a cupcake body and Justin Bieber smile.  This is all we as Canadians can put forth.
I want a Winston Churchill even knowing I’d probably have been a critic of him or an Ataturk or a Jefferson.
I really must get back to talking with God. I truly believe he’s the one that’s the primary producer , director and writer of life so there must be something I’m not getting and it’s fundamentally in my relationship with God and not anything to do with cancer or Justin Trudeau or Migrant Muslims.
I’m aging and coming to terms with my death and looking back on my life and thinking that all those ‘ideals’ I believe in and fought for, and sacrificed for,  like ‘freedom’ ,are evaporating.  We know, too,  “Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose.” I think of that each day as I see the food lines and shelters and tent cities increasing in Canada.  There’s a great image in Dr. Zhivago when the smart money man looks out on the street at the starving people outside the restaurant.  I like Douglas Adam’s ‘Restaurant at the End of the Universe’ image best.
Maybe I fear I will be a prisoner of death. I’ve known always that homicide or suicide can free me from life. I say ‘homicide’ and mean, I could ‘hop on a plane’ tonight, fly to the front, whichever one, and join someone killing terrorists and no doubt get myself killed. I could walk out today and be a missionary doctor in Africa and die in the weekly persecution of Christians.  I am ‘free’ in this life.
But death. I think I’m afraid of it because I fear there will be no ‘freedom’ there.  So the encroaching totalitarianism in Canada makes me face the fact  that God has given me death around the corner and I’m not ready for it.  I realize I’m in this stream of life and I literally can not swim back against the rising pressure of history, biography and science..  My brother is no longer ‘free’ because he has a cancer, like a parasite, attached to him.  I know he wants with all his life to be free of this rebel within, this disease that goes against everything he believes in.
I’m sorry I’ve been angry with politics and government and all the media nonsense. I’m sorry I’ve argued with friends and strangers on Facebook. My argument is with god.  I know this.  I have faith but still that doesn’t mean I have to go quietly. My meditation these days is more a 'nails on glass' scream.  I’m past the point of ‘om’.  I’m not ready to say ‘amen’ either.