Back Yard Musings

I had a dentist appolntment this morning.  I have a myriad of details to address. Everyday I'm worried I'm missing something. Calls comer in from everywhere.  Everyone is complaining it takes so long to see me.  Pharmacies want everything yesterday.  Beurocrats and lawyers put 'URGENT" across the top of their communications.  I'm seeing patients who don't come back the next week because they're dead. I feel I have 15 minutes to make a difference. All that training in motivation therapy, all the inspirational work, all the 12 step facilitation therapy learning, DBT and CBT and I don't know if I'm getting through.
I remember being in Jerusalem when the Palestinians were attacking the Israelites. They'd blown up something and burned down something and there was gunshots happening in that other part of the city, over there. Where I was it was business as usual.  It's estimated 3000 will be dead locally by the end of this year.  That's an epidemic.  A thousand dead already.  But there's this sense it's 'over there'.  I looked out my hotel room and saw the smoke a few dozen blocks away.   I'm sitting here now in Suburbia planning on leaving for another shift in the DTES this afternoon.
A hospital administrator said we don't need more doctors and nurses.  Canada has 20 times th administration of the German health care system.  Doctor ratios are much the same the world over. Where there's more than 1 to 500 to a 1000 costs go up where there's less deaths go up.  Administration is excessive and bloated in peace time.  Everyone and their family at the public trough.  No one able to find their ass with both hands.  Pot heads like arrogant communist Justin Trudeau giving money to enemies and foreign nations corruption is greater than Quebec Canada as hard as that is to conceive.  It's wearying .  The media no longer sells news. It's always propaganda with a spin. I remember when there were facts but not there's just money talk.  It's all above my pay grade. But I don't think they see the addiction. They're looking at cashing in on the victims like the tobacco companies that still make great deals. They're now getting into marijuana big time.
I don't like the news. I reacted to the lies of Justin Trudeau. His personal attack on freedom of speech and favouritism of religion by promoting the harrowing lie of Islamophobia.  It's like calling my patients "Rapaphobics'. I see to many Shiites and Sunnis who aren't Wahhabi.  Trudeau likes the Saudis.  I like Tarik Fatah.  There's a fatwa on his head but not on Trudeau's. Terrorists love Trudeau.
I'm half Irish but I didn't like the IRA bombing. I know that government's won't deal with moderates without the threat of the extremists.  Were it not for the Black Panther Martin Luther King would have not been someone government would deal with.  It's about positioning.
I'm tired. I don't sleep before dental appointments or breaks from routine. I stayed up late reading. I've been enjoying reading these days. I have been an avid reading all my life.  Mostly it's heavy.  Texts and science. I just reviewed a dozen journals. I'm skim reading for the new. So much is old for me now.  I like the immunological treatments of cancer.  There are paradigmatic shifts.  Even in my field the understanding of relationships.  So much of the intellectualism of the sterile Marxist ideology is passé. We're listening more to Victor Frankl than Freud in some ways.  The magic bullets remain.
I have difficulty living at times. I'm worn down by the constant criticism, the constant failure, the never good enough, the messages daily of decreased income, more taxes, less resources. Someone gets rewarded. It's not doctors.  The administrators are high on the hog or perhaps we should say say sheep because even bacon one of the great joys of life is under attack. Everything is bad for you and only the government is to be trusted but there's this pot head at the top who refuses urine testing and I just don't know when he's with us.  Who is doing the talking
Multiple Personality Disorders were studied and addiction was seen as an abbreviated condition, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. The two administrators on the same computer. Who on.  It's like the Twin Spirited in the Bisexual world or the Transexuals who are au femme and au drab.  There's the stoned and unstoned.  The trouble with drugs is they are psychoactive for long periods in some cases in the human body. Pot acts on an individuals brain for weeks.  Not like alcohol whose effect was days at most.  Of course there were the daily drinkers and we knew them as 'functional alcoholics' but most of the pot smokers , the ones who smoke once a week or once a month are addicted too and best described as 'functional addicts'.  But the question Tom Waits raised was who was writing the songs.  He wrote the amazing song "The Piano has been drinking' and said he quit drinking because he thought the booze might be writing the songs.  That's the question I ask of this government.  Which drug is running Ottawa.
But it's a distraction.  There's sunshine here. The dog is rolling in dirt beside me. I've just read this exciting book about sex in men's and women's prisons and the effect of transexuals on the group dynamics there. It sounds a bit like Gr 8 and 9 with all the hormones but certainly a difficult job with few guards and more division.  I'm also reading about Oxford, remembering times in the city, punting and checking out the libraries, staying in Magdallen College.  I hope to return.  There's a conference of doctors I'd like to attend. Then there's Aberdeen where my grandfather lived and I've not been there so I've got a book on that area of Scotland.
I lunched with John Wylie the great author and finished one of his historical fictions  books recently.  I had lunch that same day with Diana Garabalden and bought her book on audio tape listening to it while I drove my truck about the back woods on Vancouver Island looking for suicidal deer.  I just finished Cry Wolf by Wilbur Smith , the story of the Italian invasion of Ethiopia.  I have been following the persecution of the Coptic Church, in Egypt and Sudan and reading about the cliff churches in Ethiopia. For years I've wanted to go there. My friend is a missionary in South Sudan. I enjoyed reading of Churchill's days with sword on horseback in his autobiographical book, River War.
With travel the world has grown smaller but this summer I've been most enamoured with the back yard.  Gilbert and I have so enjoyed it here.  But time to head to work.
My mind is a muddling mess. I'm glad for work and focus.  Since Zuckerman took over Facebook to pollute it with his brand of advertising and his left wing elite propaganda I'm subjected to this political nonsense daily and find myself forwarding the Alt. News because everyone seems to be selling the kool aid and drinking it.  After glancing through Facebook, not my friends shares, but the stuff Zuckerberg algorithms generate I'm definitely begging Scotty, "for the love of god beam me up!"
But I'm thankful for coffee and yoghurt and work and dentists and especially Gilbert my little joyful one eyed partner.  Thank you Lord.

Muslim Migrants and "Terrorist Deniers"

I’ve been reactive to the ignorance I’ve perceived around the Muslim migrant issues.  I have been ridiculed, verbally abused and maligned, bullied and called names such as Racist and Islamaphobe because I’ve expressed concern. I have been told by many of my friends that they are afraid to speak up because of the bullying.
1. I’m using this time to learn about Islam.  I have the privilege and honour to know many Muslims who have been friends, mentors and teachers. However, these have generally been highly educated upper middle class people who are not representative of the “masses’.  Given there are billions of Muslims I’ve been learning the divisions of the Muslim religion.   I’m appalled that the CBC journalists and Liberal leaders who are so quick to label everyone other than themselves racist don’t seem to know the different between Sunni, Shii, Ismaeli and Suffi. CBC, instead of doing a piece on Ataturk the Secular Muslem who created Turkey out of the Ottoman Empire continues to ignore the fears of modern Istanbul inhabitants about the Moslem Brotherhood. Were CBC to be journalists of a world calibre they would know these thing but instead being ignorant would quite likely label all Turkey’s muslims ‘racist’ because right now Turkey is struggling to maintain it’s secular Ataturk state against the encroachment of the Muslem Brotherhood.
2.  The Liberals, so called ‘leftists’ and repressive are encouraging war by calling all discussion of Islam ‘hate speech’ and “islamophobia’.  Here in Canada people who use the word ‘terrorist’ are at risk because ‘freedom of speech’ is no longer part of daily discourse. If a person says a Muslim person raped a teen ager he is considered ‘racist’.  But it’s equally alright to talk about the ‘White Christian Terrorists’ presently defending the Constiution in Oregon. This will naturally cause war which seems the aim of the west as it has chosen sides and is attacking those who raise valid concerns. This ‘favouritism’ in the Liberal is like a parent who chooses one kid arguing over another rather than truly being moderate and learning more than ‘side choosing’ and ‘blaming’. The ‘blaming’ of the Liberal Media of ‘whites’ and the ‘west’ and ‘ancient history’ is ‘hate speech’.  It’s not contributing to identifying those groups of Muslims, the radicals and the fundamentalists who quite frankly hate western women and gays.  They would kill them.  We as Christians acknowledge that the Westboro Baptists are ‘extreme’ so we can all get along and don’t have to call each other racist for thinking that the United Church of Canada or Methodists or especially Mennonites aren’t particularly frightening.
3. Sociologists know that if you move large masses of migrants into any nation there will be all manner of social problems. Denying this is dangerous.  Merkel, Obama and Trudeau are by their definitions ‘Social Deniers’. ndeed if the Merkels cabal in Germany had prepared the German people for Sharia Law many of the abuses of the Germans could have been planned for.  Part of the vetting and acceptance of Migrants could well have hinged on accepting only those who accepted that men and women have equal status before the law and violence against women and gays is unacceptable in western Christian countries.  It’s no different than telling barbarians to not shit in the living room. There’s nothing ‘racist’ about expecting everyone to follow the laws.  However, Leftist Liberals don’t want this. They want to have a law for them and their ‘designated victim’ statuses and a law for the rest.  Right now they choose Palestinians over the Jews whereas last decade the flavour of the month was Jews over the English.
4.  Trudeau introduced the idea of accepting ‘all refugees’ to Canada to a large degree regardless of their criminal or mental illness history.  Prior to Trudeau immigration had preferences for the educated and those who would be needed in Canada.  It’s like Nigeria opening it’s doors to American immigration only to be shocked that Red Neck Klu Klux Klan start killing the blacks of Nigeria.  This is the state of affairs with citizens and their governments here.  Canada and Canadians and Americans have always been more accepting of immigration and refugees and foreigners than most countries represented by the barbaric United Nations. The true racism in most countries of the United Nations is difficult to access in it’s entirety because most countries in the United Nations don’t have civil rights and  have state injustice beyond anything Americans and Canadians can conceive of.
5. Donald Trump would not be saying no to Immigrants is Obama wasn’t ignoring terrorism and unwilling to call terrorists terrorists and blaming ‘gun laws’ on terrorism rather than facing the risks to americans of an un vetted large scale immigration from where ISIS reigns.  Further, Obama ignoring Americans who are legal workers has encouraged ‘illegal’ immigrants.  My friends who are ‘legal’ immigrants are offended by this ‘favouritism’ of criminals. It’s the same as my objection to Trudeau smoking dope without consequences, indeed he has a large reward, when my friends have suffered horrendously for minor indiscretion. I appreciate his desire to decriminalize marijuana laws but it still burns me that there are two laws, one for the elite like Trudeau and one for the rest of us.  My ‘legal immigrant’ friends want to be paid back the $10,000 they paid to get into the country because now there are a whole bunch of ‘illegal immigrants’ who are being ‘pardoned’ and not being required to pay.  I want my friends and I to be paid the millions compensation by the state that the marijuana laws caused us the people us to lose,  since the elite were rewarded for their drug abuse and criminal behaviour.  So criminals are being rewarded all the time these days.  That’s the attraction of Donald Trump.  The left wing liberals and democrats don’t seem to believe the laws they make for everyone else should apply to them.  This is the corruption that is killing the west.
6. Canada had 10’s of thousands of Muslim Immigrants before Trudeau.  Trudeau created the anti muslim sentiment by the way he behaved.  He was disrespectful of peoples concerns after the Charlie Hebdo killing, after ISIS beheadings, the tens of thousands of school girls gang raped in Rotherham and across Europe, the increasing videos on the internet of Muslim gang violence against the europeans who were offering them sanctuary. No one wants to give to someone who ‘bites the hand that feeds them”.  No one wants to let a person who doesn’t know where to shit have free range of their kitchen and living rooms and bedrooms.  The ideologically driven rigid Trudeau was the worst authoritarian dictator unresponsive to the majority of Canadians now expressing concerns about “timing’ and ’numbers’.  People said ’slow down’ and suddenly liberals were calling them Racists.  The mature reasonable folk who are Canadians with many moslem, jewish, Christian, and Hindu and Sikh and atheist friends were being accused by these apparatchiks Stalins and their judgemental dictatorial media representatives of being something they simply were not.  Christians collectively aren’t racists and Canada is mostly a Christian country.  Muslim countries persecute Christians every day.  Today Christians were beheaded . No Muslim is being beheaded in Canada today. Don’t lie.  Stop fabricating false comparisons.The Crusades were the 'defence' against Caliphate Muslim invasions a thousand years ago.  Today a Muslim Terrorist group invaded Christian territory and killed Christians.  Today.  Now.
7. My Muslim friends are concerned about Trudeau’s ignorance about Muslims and the Middleeast. Does he want 'honour killing' here in Canada.  Liberals objected to the laws against 'barbaric practices' which were put forward by Moslem and Indian women.  They were called racist for objecting to the removal of the 'clitoris' of girls.  By contrast 'circumcision' done properly is a small slice along the outer lips of the glans major.  Upper class moslems accept the later whereas lower class Muslims promote the further.  Jews and others 'genitally mutilate' boys, i.e. circumcision but it would be a wholly different thing if boys had their penis's removed rather than just a tag of foreskin. But the Liberals by contrast are promoting 'barbaric practices' which the enlightened of these cultures escaped to Canada to get away from.  The further fact is Sunni Muslems have killed a whole lot of Shii Muslems and all mainstream Muslems are frankly very cautious about radical Muslems because Radical Muslems kill more Muslems than anyone else.  So why is Trudeau so apparently stupid?  Is this why so many Canadians are objecting to the lack of education in the Canadian school system because the teachers seem so ignorant about history, geography and reading, writing and arithmetic but promote all manner of ideology like the worst Imans of the east.  Why can’t CBC journalists do their homework and become knowledgeable about Muslims instead of creating divisiveness with ignorance.  Why is Obama not listening to Muslims? Why do the Liberals want war.  Because this is the way Hitler started WWII. It's also the justification that Stalin used to invade many eastern countries.  Then it was ‘race’ and ‘culture’ whereas now it is ‘culture’ and ‘religion’ . Ironically the old ‘racism’ hate slur continues to be bandied about. Yet lots of buddhists are 'brown' and no one objects to 'brown' race 'Buddhists' immigrating to Canada.

8. There are good Muslims and bad Muslims. There are a whole lot of in between Muslims.  If the leadership of my country and the news wasn’t so ignorant we would not have to stoop to their level of discussion.  Right now Muslims are being allowed to pray in our school whereas Christians are not.  What better way to start war!
9.That frankly is the concern of all us peaceniks, that Trudeau and Obama and Merkel are two faced actors who are representative of the Elite who make the most money and have the most power through war.  The UN is a nation of war lords and I frankly don’t want more government because we’ve all seen the hundreds of millions killed by the totalitarian communist atheist central government empires.  Before that we had the WWI war to end all wars between Western war lords while in the east and middle east they had their own sets of wars by war lords.  In all these wars it’s not the Elite that lead but us the people.  So if Muslim migrations are for the benefit of the people, for assimilation and integration rather than creation of ghettos and sharia law states then great. But so far here in Canada Trudeau and the Liberals have been little better than Merkel and her cabal of ideologues. One asks then how many Canadian women will be gang raped and how many of us will be caught in terrorists bombs and how many gays will be killed before Trudeau is less arrogant than his famously arrogant father.

Paranoid Depressive Thinking

The key factor in paranoid thinking is that the person with the disorder is convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that their problems are not of their making.  Once they have concluded that they are the ‘victim’  they are now ‘entitled’ to ‘identify’, often arbitrarily, what it is that is causing them to suffer.
Paranoid thinking can follow from genetics or brain trauma.  The person suffers and lacks insight into their causing the suffering of themselves and others.  If this was the only time paranoid thinking showed it’s ugly head it would be a limited condition. The percentage of such cases is relatively rare.
What is common though is alcoholism and addiction.  These are commonly associated with paranoid thinking.  It’s seen in the statements ‘you make me drink’.  “if you had my wife, you’d drink too”.  “With my job stress I need to smoke crack”.  “With my pain, I need heroin”.
It’s also seen in simple depression.  “Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen’.  Indeed if you were a powerless peasant, an Irish man during the potato famine, sold into slavery or a black slave working in the cotton fields or a modern day teen age sex slave, then you would truly be a ‘victim’ and being ‘paranoid’ about your ‘owner’ or ‘pimp’ might well justify your paranoid thinking.
The trouble is, that today, people ‘justify’ their ‘depression’ because they don’t have ‘helicopters’ or ‘yachts’ and that’s ‘somebody else’s fault’.
Everyone has paranoid thinking at some times.  The issue is how sustained is it and how it responds to or doesn’t respond to ‘facts’.
When I feel I’m a ‘victim’ and become ‘paranoid’ ,thanks to the media, I don’t tend to think that I’m strategically misinformed by them for the sake of them selling communication, but rather I think the enemy is ‘government’.  Government is my first go to.  When you’re paranoid whatever the country or era the best object of your fear and entitlement to victimship is to blame your own ‘government’.
In times of war, government actually ‘externalizes’ the paranoia and the enemy, and source of all suffering is the ‘hun’, the ‘commie’, the ‘french’, al Quaida, Boco Harem,  the Americans, the Brits, the Chinks, the Japs, the Prods, the Jews, whatever is convenient.
Without a major war then naturally government wants to deflect frustrations from the rapacious taxation and create a ‘war on drugs’ which was actually a war mostly on ‘drug dealers’ or now a ‘war on terrorists’ which is indeed a war on terrorists only Terrorists are a bit like bed bugs, always laying eggs and hard to kill.
I like to think that the politicians who I can at least elect aren’t at fault in the government but rather some ‘faction’.  These are usually ‘eurocrats.’  I imagine some ‘in house’ group, a conspiracy by say the ‘appointed’ Supreme Court, or senior bureaucrats but that the elected members don’t know about it.  That’s the old idea that the King is good but the advisors are bad.  Melanie Klein showed that the paranoid didn’t want to believe mother was all bad so coined the term the ‘bad breast’.  The good breast gave milk when the child wanted it but the ‘bad breast’ didn’t respond with alacrity.  Black and white thinking, all good all bad is classic paranoia.
In democracies this factionalism comes out with partisan ship. The Republics are evil or the Democrats are evil.  Paranoids aren’t consistent.  They  switch camps too because they think they’re rational but they are indeed classic ‘emotional thinkers’.  Their allegiances are frequently affected by their feeling like the drunk who loves you in the cups and forgets you sober.
With an election there’s demonization of the other party too. Paranoids are like soccer fans only their home team is their own narcissism.  It’s really all about them.  You are their friend as long as you reward their insatiable need.
I have paranoid thinking when I become afraid for my future.  I fear aging vulnerability and can see the with the declining safety and likelihood of a respectable place for an old person ‘physician assisted suicide’ is going to look good.
Sometimes paranoids think it’s aliens that are messing with the world and with them.
Recently it’s been a war on the miners and fossil fuels industry.  Sometimes its a war on the lawyers.  Sometimes its doctors.  Corporations are a real easy target for the paranoid.  Feminists blame white men.  There’s a real hard on in the media for the religious.  Scientists are commonly the target  Indians blame the Residential School but not the laws and leaders and judges and prime ministers and their parties who created them. I’m a white man so I get paranoid about radical feminists at times.
I sometimes catch myself when I have these brief moments by thinking that the chance that it’s aliens is equally like to it being the prime minister or president.  Unfortunately aliens are more likely to be friendly than hostile and clearly if I’m having a touch of paranoia it’s because I’m feeling threatened.
If I was an american I would know it was the IRA.  Everyone knows the IRA are controlled by the CIA who in turn are controlled by corporate aliens.
My friend who is definitely paranoid considers corporations are poisoning her food.
The environmentalists collectively are my favourite paranoids because they’re sure that man is killing the planet.  They ignore the resilience of the shark, birds and cockroaches.  Maybe dinosaurs were walking ‘too heavy on Gaia’ so she extinguished them.
The United Nations Agenda 21 is paranoid about people and wants to extinguish 7 billion.
To the paranoid somebody else is always the problem.  What’s worse if if a paranoid is depressed then there’s a good chance the paranoid might want to suicide and take you with them.  They’ve got nothing to live with because the planet is going to die because of the Alberta Tar Sands or the Chinese are en mass converting to moslem and forcing atheist americans to accept sharia law or die.
It’s always perfectly reasonable whatever one thinks from inside the paranoid psychosis.
There’s no successful psychotherapy for paranoids .  While everyone has paranoid thinking at times paranoids live in their fear and resentment and suck that time like there was no tomorrow.  Terrorists are always fairly paranoid. Suicide bombers are definitely depressive paranoids.
Medications, anti psychotics have been highly effective in reducing the extreme edges of the paranoia.  A paranoid who spits on Jews for instance on medication is likely to maintain the idea that the reason for starvation in the world is the jews, they will likely stop spitting on jews. The behavioural expression of paranoia is best managed with medication but take the medication away and not uncommonly the particular paranoid delusional system will return.  With depressive paranoid thinking treating the depression with antidepressants and antipsychotics might in fact restore the person to normal where they look at their ideas that Napoleon is today  reincarnated as  Chinese general whose also a transexual might suddenly seem odd to the person. They say, I think I had some odd thoughts. They don’t seem to be bothering me .  In time with further enjoyment and good living they might let go of the paranoid ideation unless its trigger. The pure paranoid doesn’t get better.
The drug addicts paranoia doesn’t suddenly stop with the drug stopping.  it’ often takes a year or two for a person whose had paranoia as a result of their alcoholism , stimulant or mariuana using to actually have clear thoughts.  Mostly their thinking will remain impaired as long as they are around other drug addicts with crazy thinking. It’s always easy to relapse to paranoid depressive thinking.
In this regard paranoid depressive thinking has some elements of the dissociations that are associated with post traumatic stress disorder. When the latter as war vets see war on television they suddenly being to act and behave like they’re back in the battlefield.  All the paranoid depressive thinking person needs is a new story about Rothwell to get the paranoid juices flowing.
I m fairly reasonable right now but financial insecurity can quickly have me thinking the billionaires are out to destroy us. I helps to have insight. Humour helps even more Good friends and loving family are the best buffer.