Back Yard Musings

I had a dentist appolntment this morning.  I have a myriad of details to address. Everyday I'm worried I'm missing something. Calls comer in from everywhere.  Everyone is complaining it takes so long to see me.  Pharmacies want everything yesterday.  Beurocrats and lawyers put 'URGENT" across the top of their communications.  I'm seeing patients who don't come back the next week because they're dead. I feel I have 15 minutes to make a difference. All that training in motivation therapy, all the inspirational work, all the 12 step facilitation therapy learning, DBT and CBT and I don't know if I'm getting through.
I remember being in Jerusalem when the Palestinians were attacking the Israelites. They'd blown up something and burned down something and there was gunshots happening in that other part of the city, over there. Where I was it was business as usual.  It's estimated 3000 will be dead locally by the end of this year.  That's an epidemic.  A thousand dead already.  But there's this sense it's 'over there'.  I looked out my hotel room and saw the smoke a few dozen blocks away.   I'm sitting here now in Suburbia planning on leaving for another shift in the DTES this afternoon.
A hospital administrator said we don't need more doctors and nurses.  Canada has 20 times th administration of the German health care system.  Doctor ratios are much the same the world over. Where there's more than 1 to 500 to a 1000 costs go up where there's less deaths go up.  Administration is excessive and bloated in peace time.  Everyone and their family at the public trough.  No one able to find their ass with both hands.  Pot heads like arrogant communist Justin Trudeau giving money to enemies and foreign nations corruption is greater than Quebec Canada as hard as that is to conceive.  It's wearying .  The media no longer sells news. It's always propaganda with a spin. I remember when there were facts but not there's just money talk.  It's all above my pay grade. But I don't think they see the addiction. They're looking at cashing in on the victims like the tobacco companies that still make great deals. They're now getting into marijuana big time.
I don't like the news. I reacted to the lies of Justin Trudeau. His personal attack on freedom of speech and favouritism of religion by promoting the harrowing lie of Islamophobia.  It's like calling my patients "Rapaphobics'. I see to many Shiites and Sunnis who aren't Wahhabi.  Trudeau likes the Saudis.  I like Tarik Fatah.  There's a fatwa on his head but not on Trudeau's. Terrorists love Trudeau.
I'm half Irish but I didn't like the IRA bombing. I know that government's won't deal with moderates without the threat of the extremists.  Were it not for the Black Panther Martin Luther King would have not been someone government would deal with.  It's about positioning.
I'm tired. I don't sleep before dental appointments or breaks from routine. I stayed up late reading. I've been enjoying reading these days. I have been an avid reading all my life.  Mostly it's heavy.  Texts and science. I just reviewed a dozen journals. I'm skim reading for the new. So much is old for me now.  I like the immunological treatments of cancer.  There are paradigmatic shifts.  Even in my field the understanding of relationships.  So much of the intellectualism of the sterile Marxist ideology is passé. We're listening more to Victor Frankl than Freud in some ways.  The magic bullets remain.
I have difficulty living at times. I'm worn down by the constant criticism, the constant failure, the never good enough, the messages daily of decreased income, more taxes, less resources. Someone gets rewarded. It's not doctors.  The administrators are high on the hog or perhaps we should say say sheep because even bacon one of the great joys of life is under attack. Everything is bad for you and only the government is to be trusted but there's this pot head at the top who refuses urine testing and I just don't know when he's with us.  Who is doing the talking
Multiple Personality Disorders were studied and addiction was seen as an abbreviated condition, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. The two administrators on the same computer. Who on.  It's like the Twin Spirited in the Bisexual world or the Transexuals who are au femme and au drab.  There's the stoned and unstoned.  The trouble with drugs is they are psychoactive for long periods in some cases in the human body. Pot acts on an individuals brain for weeks.  Not like alcohol whose effect was days at most.  Of course there were the daily drinkers and we knew them as 'functional alcoholics' but most of the pot smokers , the ones who smoke once a week or once a month are addicted too and best described as 'functional addicts'.  But the question Tom Waits raised was who was writing the songs.  He wrote the amazing song "The Piano has been drinking' and said he quit drinking because he thought the booze might be writing the songs.  That's the question I ask of this government.  Which drug is running Ottawa.
But it's a distraction.  There's sunshine here. The dog is rolling in dirt beside me. I've just read this exciting book about sex in men's and women's prisons and the effect of transexuals on the group dynamics there. It sounds a bit like Gr 8 and 9 with all the hormones but certainly a difficult job with few guards and more division.  I'm also reading about Oxford, remembering times in the city, punting and checking out the libraries, staying in Magdallen College.  I hope to return.  There's a conference of doctors I'd like to attend. Then there's Aberdeen where my grandfather lived and I've not been there so I've got a book on that area of Scotland.
I lunched with John Wylie the great author and finished one of his historical fictions  books recently.  I had lunch that same day with Diana Garabalden and bought her book on audio tape listening to it while I drove my truck about the back woods on Vancouver Island looking for suicidal deer.  I just finished Cry Wolf by Wilbur Smith , the story of the Italian invasion of Ethiopia.  I have been following the persecution of the Coptic Church, in Egypt and Sudan and reading about the cliff churches in Ethiopia. For years I've wanted to go there. My friend is a missionary in South Sudan. I enjoyed reading of Churchill's days with sword on horseback in his autobiographical book, River War.
With travel the world has grown smaller but this summer I've been most enamoured with the back yard.  Gilbert and I have so enjoyed it here.  But time to head to work.
My mind is a muddling mess. I'm glad for work and focus.  Since Zuckerman took over Facebook to pollute it with his brand of advertising and his left wing elite propaganda I'm subjected to this political nonsense daily and find myself forwarding the Alt. News because everyone seems to be selling the kool aid and drinking it.  After glancing through Facebook, not my friends shares, but the stuff Zuckerberg algorithms generate I'm definitely begging Scotty, "for the love of god beam me up!"
But I'm thankful for coffee and yoghurt and work and dentists and especially Gilbert my little joyful one eyed partner.  Thank you Lord.