Molar Root Abscess and the Toxic Workplace

It’s not easy to admit to being a whimp.  I had an appointment to have a crown put on by Dr. Douglas Lovely, my amazing dentist New Westminster.  I admit I’ve loved going to him for 20 years because he’s literally painless. As a child our dentist didn’t believe children felt pain. It left as lasting aversion to dentists.  Doug’s work is the best.  It helps he’s a sailor and that all my doctor friends see him too.

The day before the crown my face flared up. A horrible night of sleeplessness and pain.  I was so glad to have the appointment.  My face was slowed and Doug did the xray showing the tooth was cracked and a “pea size“ abscess at the base of the second root.  The crown wasn’t anything but it was on a cracked tooth as well.  My gnashing my teeth in my sleep at night was catching up on me.  Doug gave me antibiotics and recommended high dose ibuprofen.  He had to bring the swelling down to extract the tooth.  Extraction was set for a week later.  

Tha night was awful. I don‘t do sleepless nights well anymore. Too many years of call.  First surgery and deliveries and later suicidal calls and drunken calls.  It’s been years though that I’ve had to go to a hospital. Still it’s hard to get back to sleep.  And a tooth ache didn’t help.  Doug warned me it might get worse before it would get better.  But I’m a whimp.  My face swelled out like a chipmunk with nuts.

I had to take the afternoon off work because I was just simply too fatigue. Fortunately the last morning of work was slow.  Doug had contacted me when I sent a picture of my lopsided face and expressed my abject misery. ‘It’s almost as bad as a man flu’ summed it out.  A lot of cowering and shaking by men all round.  Drum roll in the back ground. Images of the grim reaper. Women thoroughly insensitive.  ‘Tooth ache. ‘. ‘Man flu’.  Really? 

No one God has them deliver babies. I’d never do it.  I also concluded yet again I’d never make a spy. The first mention of torture and I’d give up anything to stop the pain. I was beyond Motrin and Alleve and ASA. I was on a cocktail of all three at three times the recommended dose.  I was a toxic waste dump of NSAD’s.  I understand and always have why people who aren’t treated sufficintly for pain by doctors turn to the street vigilantes services for pain defence.  Pain is thoroughly underestimated by bureaucrats and anyone who has not known it’s bite.  

I couldn’t bite either. Soft foods and soups and embarrassing drool out the side of my face.

Bleak.  Suicidal. Rethinking euthanasia.  Paranoid moments. Wondering who might have caused the toothache. Was it the Russians. Was it radioactive.Did Trudeau do this. All else evil in Canada today can be placed at his stupid feet. Why not my tooth ache.  3 and 4 am arre ripe times for vivid imagination.  Was the chip some government lab had placed in my tooth finally needing a battery change. I’ve heard all the best ideas from schizophrenic patients. Even Freud concluded they might be right.  Doug would tell me if I had a chip in my tooth and the battery needed replacement. He said he’d take it out and then do an implant.   I don’t have dental care.  Only illegal immigrants get that in Canada.  Who cares what the cost is when your eyes are bulging out. I even thought of going to the hospital emergency for morphine but remembered this was Canada and I’d wait for 10 or 20 hours in the waitroom for a shot of morphine exposed to all the latest virus bacteria and the hell of Canadian ER’s.   Light would come soon.

Doug was in Whistler but called my pharmacist who gave me Dexamethasone and Flagyl to add to the Clindamycin.  Dougs voice is reassuring.  He calls after all his work.  He still cares. Doctors are punished today for caring.  The administration is swaggering and arrogant, the worst in the civilized world, 20 times what is needed, doctors hated by government here, the fewest in the civilized world, longest wait lists.  







 I watch a video of the Ontario doctors speaking out against the Liberal government there. I think of all the patients who are so desperate and angry and how little we have to give them anymore now that all our health care resources are devoted to government administration and doctors are condemned for unprofessionalism because they won’t kill themselves fast enough. The paper work and the endless rules and committee ivory tower bullshit destroying us as the patients cry and come in angrier and more and more in despair. Everyone has gone without to pay the outrageous taxes and all the money goes to debt and administration. It’s so depressing on the frontlines.

I’m thankful that dentists are still free of the scourge of Space Station administration arrogant in their ignorance of the death they cause from distance and negligence.  

I’m unhappy.  A Christian biker died.  He was a friend as much as anything.  He loved his gal. He loved Jesus.  I’ve not adjusted to the dying these last couple of years.  Family, friends and the epidemic of fentanyl. It was bad enough working front lines through the AIDS epidemic. This is worse.

The government blamed the doctors for the opiate crisis.  I read last week they were totally off. Their calculations all wrong. Their false accusations like all the other fake news right out there.  It turns out that the fentanyl is just another Chinese attack and part of the drug wars. ‘Whatever minor factor ‘overprescribing’ is ,is the least concern. But there goes our government demonizing doctors and our dying patients .  They’re in the business of marijuana and euthanasia now.  

My pain had dropped with the sleep and hope the added anti biotic brought.  I had homework to do.  I just lay in bed.  I had all this stuff that was to be done but another weekend devoted to getting ready to go back to the wars.  Any female patient can lie and falsely accuse a male doctor if he doesn’t agree with breaking the law and lying for her and a committee will destroy the doctor because that’s their agenda.  It’s not paranoia. They do the same to female doctors.  All the doctors realize now that any patient , especially the psychopaths,  have the power of complaints, any of which cause the doctor to lose $10,000 with no cost to the patient.  There’s a totally skewed power dynamic and it’s all a lie.  There’s no cost in Canada for perjury.   

Indeed multiculturalism denies the value of truth or knowledge.  It’s no longer about anything but feelings and power and men are all wrong and white men are all racists.  Every doctor I know, male and female, in the front lines tries to do the least now. No one wants to take on an unknown patient.  We’re working like our administration which is collectively destroying the practice of medicine. I’m entering an age when I may need medical care. I’m afraid of hospitals because the workplace is utterly toxic because of the administration and the anti doctor government. The nurses are being reduced too so we can have more politically correct administration.

I don’t have the reserve for a tooth ache.  I don’t have the reserve for sleepless nights.  My friends are all struggling with normal life and the workplace is killing them. The demands on doctors have skyrocketted while the fat cat administration is swaggering with self praise, making the rules for their dream jobs and constant vacations and giving themselves raises upon raises but never visiting the front lines. It’s WWI all over again and we’re the machine gun fodder.

The patients get less. We’re all condemned by a cruel and perfect government judgmental to the core Everyone is ‘offended’ all the time and the standards of perfections and political correctness are beyond the pale. You can kill with negligence but don’t dare swear or raise your voice or object to lacks of beds or deadly wait lists.  And then you hear they’re going to give more ‘free health care’ to immigrant families as more doctors suicide under the strain and in response to the cruelty and insensitivity of the administration.

Another night of sleep. More ibuprofen, more antibiotics.  The swelling’sdown. I can eat. I think of my colleagues working after having babies and having surgery.  I know so many stoics. I admire so many I know facing the deluge of demands one on one face to face in the front lines and those far from the front are shooting them in the back and fearing that they might ever have to go back out there .  They ‘ve played it smart, got the cushion jobs, moved to the back, played politics, not kept up with medicine, medicine just a stepping stone to power and control.  They never really cared for patients. They’ve seen so few and risen so fast. 

I’m feeling better. I get to church.  I’m humbled by Jesus.  Laura and I watched Monty Python reruns. Laughter therapy.  Communion was good.  The god kids were like herding cats.No one can afford to live in Vancouver.  The criminals and government have turned the city into an unliveable place except for jet setters.  I’m just the ‘Help’’.  Laura laughed to read the book about the ‘help’ and what the help said about the masters.  The destruction of the middle class is taking place. Only the elite are well here. The Mayor actually said something like it being reasonable to pay $3500 rent a month while a miserable shack costs a million anywhere.  The television constantly shows pictures of the rest of the world and the refugees are so happy as scab labour but given the benefits don’t seem to want to work.    

Those of us native Canadians who worked all our lives are leaving major gaps in services as we retire and no one is foolish enough to work in Canada. The whole work ethic is a farce when you see the leadership off on vacation and never working seriously before getting the best leadership job on who his name is.  Work doesn’t pay is the Canadian idea. Entitlement and social justic warriors and activists are all the rage. No one wants to do physics and chemistry or cut lumber or take risky jobs with axes and such.  It’s a talk world.

I type more today than I did as a secretary.  But I get paid for all that I know of biochemistry and psychopharmacology and diagnostics though naming things is quickly going out of fashion. Everything is fashion

I am comforted by the words of the priest. I’m thankful for the sweet sounds of Barry’s music.  I am thankful for all the friendliness of the people we meet here. Downstairs having coffee in the church I remember my mother and father. Dad helped put a new roof on the old church.  Mom always helped make meals and coffee.  We all did the dishes.  The coffee is fine. I’m thankful I don’t drool out of the side of my mouth.  I’m looking forward to camping.  

After everyone is gone. I walk Gilbert along the river and watch a green headed mallard land on the stream.  The  trees are all budding. There a bunting today.  A robin is in a bush with fresh green buds.  Lots of tulips and daffodils. I must focus on the good things. I’ve been depressed with sleepleness and death and a toothache.  I’m a whimp.  I think I once was more.  I sailed solo across an ocean. Faced charging bear.  White water canoed. Walked frozen across tundra after our skidoo went through the ice.  I saved a few children. A woman thanked me for saving her eye.  A few people told me that I convinced them not to kill themselves.  Thousands are sober. Thousands didn’t kill themselves on my watch.  I’ve done a bit of good in my time but it’s all unfashionable today.

I talked to my female colleague and she’s being punished like me for working with the people Jesus used to hang with.  We’re silly not to have been the doctors for the wealthiest. I turned down the job and so did she. We’re working with the really sick, the end of the road, and the feral.  It’s a single party insurance scheme and we’re not supposed to keep these people alive. More and more we’re co opted by insurance companies to write reports to courts and to keep people out of their toxic workplaces and to give them a chance at the legal lottery.  ICBC , our auto insurance plan thanks to government mismanagement is on the brink of bankruptcy. Wherever government gets involved there is horrendous waste and mismanagement in Canada. Rapidly a third world country. Not the meritocracy it once was.  But you know you’re getting old when you talk about the good old days.

I’m insignificantly significant and significantly insignificant.  75% of my colleagues wouldn’t recommend medicine in Canada.  It’s still a beautiful spring.  Today’s sunshine was miraculous.  My face no longer hurts.  I laughed to watch Monty Python’s absurdity, « Always look on the Bright Side of life.’  

It really is funny.  You must stop taking yourself seriously.  It was just a tooth ache. Not nearly as bad as a man flu.

Political Correctness, Lord Love a Duck!

Political correctness is the false belief that one can pick up a tourd by the clean end.
Freedom of speech is essential so that doctors can tell patients that they have cancer. Once a thing is correctly named there is a possibility of cure.  However if we are denied the right to speak truly of the disease then of course the poor will die.
Language is important  despite the fact that today ‘marketting’ prevails. Recently the spin doctors of the Liberal government called the ‘immigrants’ ‘refugees’.  The common Canadian, especially the most uneducated and inexperienced who were attracted to the Satanic appeal of Justin Trudeau and the Trudeau charm, did not know that there is a vast and critical difference between a ‘refugee’ and a ‘migrant’.
A migrant can indeed be an ‘invader’ and many of the ‘migrants’ in the recent refugee scandals have indeed been invaders, a fifth column of the Islam Caliphate.  Many also have been the adult children of wealthy families using the ‘refugee’ route to immigration to by pass and jump the queue of the conventional ‘immigration’ systems.
A refugee is a person who goes to the first country of escape.  The Harper Conservative government resettled millions of Vietnamese becaus not only were these people refugees but they had been the allies of the American and Canadians in the war between Capitalism and Democracy and Freedom versus the Communism and Slavery.  The Vietnam war was won by the soldiers on the ground but lost by Hollywood, Hanoi Jane and the ‘marketting” media which effectively undermined the war effort at home.  Drugs, sex, and rock and roll , love in’s, and peace rallies were offered and funded by the communists in America while American soldiers were betrayed and killed overseas. All efforts to further peace in Communist countries by contrast were met with Gulag and death squads.  The very freedom that democracy offered resulted in its own demise.
Not until Reagan did the Communist system die.  Margaret Thatcher said, "Socialism fails because it runs out of other peoples money .” The halcyon cry of socialism is not 'steal from the rich and give to the poor" but rather "steal from the worker and give to the idle".   Even today Trudeau has squandered for his own nefarious purposes the nest eggs gathered by Canadians under conservative governments for their children and children’s children. Just as Pierre Trudeau did Justin Trudeau is selling the country into massive debt.
To maintain the momentum he is also pushing drugs.  "Give them cake" Marie Antoinette cried.  Trudeau says, "Give them pot".
The fall of Russia occurred because of rampant alcoholism. Of the western world only Russia had a rising infant mortality due to fetal alcohol syndrome. The products of their factories were further flawed such that in the competition of arms , the "Dessert Storm Arms Bazaar," "American made and "NATO pushed" won out over Communist made products. Communist workers drunk and under paid produced weapons that misfired. American workers well rewarded made weapons that were reliable.  The genius of design was further rewarded in the west compared to the east where the best dachaus always went to the bureaucrats and administrators.
Communism , now Cultural Communism,  in the west is Aetheism. It’s a godless regime devoted to Dictatorship.  Lenin, a mass murderer, with the assistance of Wall Street set up USSR system of central authority and the 5 year plans with hundreds of millions killed and mass starvation due to poor administration and corrupt beurocracy.  As Arendt had found in her study of Nuremberg the key to appreciating the demonic dynasties of mass murder was not in looking at the character of their leaders but rather the lack of character of their followers.
Arendt’s term was ‘banality of evil’.  The whole of the Nazi (National Socialist system to separate it from International Socialism or Communist system ) system was dependent upon the followers
Buffy St Marie, the female Canadian aboriginal folk singer, wrote the most provocative song “Universal soldier’ saying that war dependent on one man’s decision.  There is obviously much truth in it but Arendt’s life work showed that “Universal Beurocrat” or “Universal Administrator” was more likely the better explanation for the deaths of millions than ‘blaming the victim’ , 'unknown soldier.
The civil service noted for  its cowardice and it's pretence of civility is distinct from the active military service noted for it's bravery and rawness.  Soldier's live by their decisions whereas beurocrats get others killed. Lawyers and judges are all like Monday morning quarterbacks, pretentious critics who stay as far from the front as possible, making as much money as possible on the suffering of others and their real decisions. They are at least superior to journalists and Hollywood who get rich off the spectacle of war.
Buffy St. Marie, because of her gender's identification with the civil service and tendency to be protected from real combat, disparaged the actual real 'victim' of war, the soldier.    In contrast to WWII which was a rich and poor man's war, Vietnam was merely a poor man's war, the sons of the wealthy and eliteall using 'loopholes'  to  stay  home to participate in the party with the 'free sex' girls of the 'women's movement".
The individual soldier is no different than a slave, a tool created for good or evil and rarely much more.  He and now she are the pawns of the rich and powerful forces.  The army today is little different from the mercenaries in the army  of the British empire and    Ottoman  empire and Roman Empire before that.  The largest army of the world, the Chinese army, retains some ideological basis.  While patriotism is under attack like the white history in America, in China  the superiority of the racism inherent to the  Chinese is fuelled by communism's megalomaniac world domination goals.  The UN Islamic army of Bangladesh is fueled by religion like the Christian and Muslim army of yore.  The Crusaders were a defensive army against the mass murderer Mohammed who transformed the Middle east from Christian and Zorastrian to present day Islam.  
A Romanian, asked what it was like under communism before the fall of communism, essentially at the time fall of the Berlin Wall said, “Everyone was poor. Everyone was depressed.  You couldn’t complain because if you did they put you in jail. The leaders called themselves communists.”  After the fall?  “Everyone was poor. Everyone was depressed. You could complain now and they didn’t put you in jail. The leaders were the same people but they called themselves businessmen now.”
Bob Dylan, one of the world’s greatest plagiarists and writers of original material paraphrased Dr. Johnson by saying “Steal a little and they put you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king.”  Karen Armstrong in Fields of Blood , like Jared Diamond in Guns, Germs and Steel showed that the agricultural revolution was immediately followed by the empires of robbers and pirates.  The world overall was changed rapidly from the farmer providing for his family and communities needs, and as Marx would say ‘owning the land, the means of production’  became the property of the STRONG MAN.  All land and all means of production became the STATE’s as the Kingdom only changed in name under communism moving from one form of dictatorship to another.  At least in the monarchies  the Magna Carta and such advances for benefits of individuals had occurred, while in Communism the very design of the system attempted to circumnavigate the difficulty of Magna Carta.
The STRONG MAN, the gang leader, took power and then agriculture allowed him and his band of merry follower to have workers/farmers/slaves producing food and arms while the military went to the next valley to conquer, i.e. steal and rape.

1. The “Military Industrial Complex” isn’t an American made product of the post Industrial Age as Social Communist propaganda would say but in fact dates back to the dawn of civilization. UR in ancient middle east, birthplace of Abraham, was the one of the  first of the Western Civilizations “military Industrial complexes”.  In the day Chariots were made and copper swords, before bronze swords and steel swords gave way to todays  AK47’s and Cruise Missiles.  All were made by peasants but today's peasants have better hair styles ,watch CNN and listen to CBC news. 
2. The United Nations is a war lord construct.  The penultimate tribal gang is todays MAFIA.  It’s the basic unit of Civilization.  The blood related 'tribe' of traditional society, the north American Indians (not Nations as they would have you believe but rather tribes, language counts) has given way to the Hell's Angels a non blood related tribal construct. 
3. The first dynasties were family and blood related.  To this day they remain mired in this materialistic eugenics model with the dynastic rule of Kennedies after the business mogul liquor running father, then the Bush father and son oil producers for the military machine, with their business connection to oil the elixir of war.   Justin Trudeau the dynastic son of Pierre Trudeau, the same communist pairing as Korean’s Kim Jong un and his father despite ideological differences revert to the primordial favourite like some kind of modern day  parent child, the favourite of religous iconography.  At least Canada dynamic communist duo dress better than their counterparts.   
4. A leader is never just one man, at least not since the days of the hunter gatherers.  Today’s leaders are more like sports ‘coaches’ or ‘movie producers’ with a core ‘nest’ of merry men, much like the medieval lords around the King.  The administrators are by strict contrast no more such political leaders than soldiers are. They have the same peasant mentality though they wield enormous power.  They are without the talent of political leaders whose skills at diplomacy, compromise and capacity to mould and lead are evidenced by their success. The pompous men of Brussels EU  are in strict contrast to the genius of political leaders like Bill Clinton and Donald Trump. The latter are dependent on their extraordinary ability to choose the right people and  fashion alliances. Ataturk of Turkey was one of the greatest leaders of all time similar to Churchill in these gifts. Bill Clinton was a genius to marry Hillary despite his obvious failure to satisfy Monica.   Hillary made the grievous error of depending on the abject losers Robby Mook as her campaign manager.   By Contrast Donald Trump chose the brilliant  extraordinary Kellyanne Conway as his Campaign Manager.  Conway Trumped Book!!! It was reminiscent of games with Goretsky controlling the ice in hockey. Indeed American men study sports especially football as a training in the nuances and understanding of politics. Sadly women such as Hillary Clinton's Huma Abedin, while they obviously knew about sex given the marriage to Weaner and money given their ties to the Saudi purse appeared utterly ignorant of any team sport which would have prepared them better from the campaign.  Administration and Soldiering are based solely, not on the acquisition of power, but rather on the distribution of power.  This explains why military dictatorships so rapidly devolve into fear based entities because they lack the appeal of character which the likes of  Clinton and Trump bring to office. Administrations and administrators necessarily appeal to the socialist minded as socialism is so dependent on legalism and dictatorships. It's no surprise that the UN , the greatest socialistic entity on the planet after Communist China, should put out AGENDA 21 encouraging Beurocrats and Administrators the world over to rise up and take power. It's call to world domination and control is little different than the original Lenin cry 'worker rise up'  Rise up so we can eventually win the world and be dictators to you as we are today still dictators say this communist leaders like China's STRONG MAN Stalinesque figure Xi Jinping.   Get rid of the Magna Carta, the French Revolution and the American Constitution and skip  right to the Emperor  Dictator bits say all these socialist communist liars and philanderers.  
5. The failure of communism was its inability to competitively create wealth. Capitalism with it’s inherent reward of the worker individually, ie capitalism, has been in direct competition with system of distribution of rewards of the worker by the Communist STATE whereby the most meritorious gain little while the least meritorious gain a lot.  
6. The trick of political correctness and ‘marketting’ is to deny individuals ‘real’ power and wealth by giving them the appearances of ‘power’ and ‘wealth’.  This is seen in ‘badges’ and ‘ranks’ and ‘influence pedalling.’  

Today there is a mix of central or socialist State power and decentralized or capitalist power.
Many would argue that the control of wealth and power in the world is limited to handfuls of families. The Rothschild’s are the most often identified by the conspiracy crowd but the Italians were the leading family at one time, starting the back rooms banker traditions in the 15 th century and others before.  One could almost guess that each of the controlling families was the last remnant of the former empires, hence the Italian bankers are what’s left of the original Roman Empire but before them were the Greeks magates left over from the Greek empires, the Mexican Billionaire a product of the Spanish Conquest,  the Egyptian billionaire family a product of  Alexander’s spoils.  In the far east the spoils of the Moghuls stand behind much of the leadership that exists centuries later. Definitely Mecca , the Eastern Disney mandatory tourist franchise was created by  Mohammed who stole all the wealth of the Christians, Jews and Zoroastrian throughout the Middle East to gain his power, best represented today in the glory of Dubai.
Capitalism has reigned since these early war lords. The two latest groups of wealth gathers were the leaders of the French and American Revolutions coupled with the Communist Revolutionaries in West and East.
 “Steal a little and they put you in jail, steal a lot and they make you King”.  Or Czar. Or Caliph. Or President. Or Prime Minister.
If I today were to get the local poor of Vancouver's DTES ghetto to rise up and throw off it’s beurocratic masters  marching  through Kitsilano,  Shaughnassey and West Vancouver, taking the wealth of the rich elite we’d likely have enough swag to party for a few dozen years. That’s about as long as Communist Countries last. The traditional capitalist decentralized distribution of wealth is simply to date superior to the left liberal or progressive rape of resources and pillage and then central redistribution.  Communist distribution is necessarily corrupt giving rise to the obvious corruption inherent in dynastic leaders like Trudeau and son, such an obvious throw back without any suggestion of meritocracy.
The success of empire is a much more complex thing. It’s fundamental to the study of English cricket, American Football, European Soccer and Canadian Hockey.  Basketball, developed by Canadians, might well have been a major contributor to Obama's successful campaign.
The Mainstream Media, now called the Fake Media would have us believe differently. They would deceitfully argue that they are ‘free’ and giving us ‘news’ but simply are no longer reporting ‘facts’ without ‘opinion’ as was once the case. But then before we understood Marshal McCluhan’s the “Medium is the Message’ that was true. Now the age of rationalism and age of intellectualism of man has given way to the age of emotion and age of emotionalism of women.  Cognitive behavioural therapy says that emotion is merely downstream construct of thought.  "I think therefore I am of modernism became  “I feel therefore I am" of so called ‘Post modernism’ which is probably better called  ‘ultra modernism’.  Neither represent "enlightment"  The clever and emotional are not wise.  Wisdom has been limited rather than expanded by the intersectionality of their social or cultural communism. History gave us dickheads who were followed by Vagina heads. The biggest hats are seen in the Eastern block.
Truth is what is lost with political correctness. Politics is a choice of the least bad alternative.
The Security Council of the United Nations is simply the principal arms dealers of the planet. They were put in place to maintain the status quo.  Not to end all wars. What would be the benefit in that to the Military Industrial Complex, ie Civilization as we know it.
As Camus and Kaffka showed so elegantly and the movie Clockwork Orange did as well, the struggle is between the Individual and the State. This was best depicted in recent years by the communist construct of the BORG versus the Federalist construct of Captain Picard in the Star Trek television series.   ‘
In the military the double speak became “the best defence is an offence’.  So in political correctness, ‘black is white’.  This was the ‘peace missile’ and the politician saying ‘trust me I’m a politician’.  Whenever Justin Trudeau speaks, with his endless stream of distracting platitudes, his forked tongue flicks.  While Canadians see Justin Trudeau as the greatest liar of all times so the Koreans see Kim  as their greatest liar.   Neither is.   The competition is for the biggest lie. That's the only truth in the great deceit of political correctness. The system  is fundamentally based on deceit.
The big brain of man, the sociobiological construct is that we not only evolved as ‘tool makers’ but we developed ‘political correctness’ and created the lies of the ‘emperor’s new clothes’ and all the myths that maintain a few in power over the many, whether they be the committee of communist murderers or the dynastic rulers of the Bush and Trudeau families.
What is ironic today is just as Mugabe has been deposed because his wife Grace wanted to use him to gain the throne as Hillary attempted to use Bill,  both  lost all.  There remains a  stronger eugenic belief that blood trumps sperm.  Even Dan Brown’s materialistic Da Vinci Code sought the ‘blood’ of Jesus hoping for a ‘DNA” combination. So marriage more rarely that progeny transmits royalty, ironically even in Communist Countries.
No wonder Marx and Engles set out to destroy the family to place all power in the head of state.
Proxy wars are the thing today.  Real life competitions between the military hardware of various families and nations.  Argentina buys missiles from the French and these compete with Missiles from British factories.  In truth France served both England and Argentina. Just as the Rothschild banked for Britain and France at Waterloo the backers of war bet on both sides to spread their likelihood of winning. George Soros as Satan's man destroys everything in hope of making a profit on the resulting wars.
Normally wars are wet and dry, in jungle or dessert with hard ware and men competing in opposing environments. The Falklands was as close to an arctic war as we’ve seen since the demise of the German army in the Russian winter.  No one is quick to put their machine against cold, water and heat yes, but not so much cold. Oil freezes, tanks and planes perform poorly.
A Scandanavian researcher showed that the working class of Israel and Palestine , soldiers, scientists and more were involved in war while the administrative class that much more deceitful and politically correct lot were involved in failed peace talks. If peace came to the Middle East there would simply be no economy and mass starvation would follow.
Despite the feminist outcries and forced participation and lingerie and sex and all manner of marketting ‘women fighting’ or even ‘pornography’ doesn’t make as much money as ‘War’.
Today abortion pays more than birth.
Euthanasia supersedes healing.
Death culture.
There is life and death.  Yes and No.  Leonard Cohen summed it up by saying “there is a war between the odd and the even”.
The proposition ‘all’s fair in love and War’ simply underwrites that war might lead to sex but it was seriously frowned on when sex lead to war. Domestic violence was one thing but the Rape of the Sabines was sticky business from a marketing perspective. The ISIS marketing  of war is an opportunity for  ‘sex slaves" certainly was the attraction for Canadian men to leave political correct and sexually rigid Canada for the potential promiscuity of Arabian nights. The pornography of the millions of Chinese male soldiers is mostly white American girls.  The ‘spoils’ of war has been Sex and that's unlikely to change any time soon despite increasing numbers of women and gays in the military. Women may well be attracted more by swag.  The 60’s Wood stock communist sale was ‘free sex’.
The lie is always in the world prepositioned by the word  ‘free’. The marketting campaign of the navy is ‘free travel’. And of course a girl in every port.
Political Correctness is lying.  It’s putting a wrapping on a dirty thing. It’s deodorizer. It’s that Pine fragrance in the cigar smoker’s car. it’s the deodorant put on the dirty arm pits. It’s all these ‘lies’.  It’s a big brain thing. It’s fake news.
It’s demonic if you believe Satan is the source of all lies. That is the Christian position. There is Satan and there is Jesus. That’s the dichotomy of religion. Us and them.  Good and Bad. Patriotic and Unpatriotic.
The communists moved this to ‘clean energy’ or ‘holy energy’ and ‘evil energy’ . The irony is that coal and nuclear power were creating the electricity to power the  apparently clean ‘electric cars’ which the silly consumers were buying them  for their ‘cachet’ value. The long term pollution of solar panels is only now being exposed.  Political correctness is solely fashion. It's the latest see through bikini.  It's the sexy niquab and the exposed ankle of Victorian era. When it's not outright deceit it's the tantalizing tease.  Politically correctness is akin to bestiality and pedophilia put forth as true love. Marketing. Marketing. Marketing. Big brains.
It’s the pink paint on the cruise missile
I don’t know why it bothers me but I prefer the Truth. So when the Judge calls me a liar , I’m resentful and offended and must spend years praying for him because I know he’s identified with the criminal whose dirty money has paid for the lawyer who has contributed to the sacrifice of the near virgin girl who suicides when she can not protect her child. There’s a chivalry in the truth. The the White Knight hang up. There’s all that coupled with the Pirate and the Clint Eastwood Dirty Harry appeal to the rebel. Today’s the rebels are without a cause cause and call themselves ‘activists’. Their song is  Mila Cyress  “Wrecking Balls”.   The Angry Young Woman is a caricature of the Angry Young Man. As I grow older I realize that those who have died before have done so because of the soul destroying boredom of government and Hollywood myth productions.  Nothing is new. All is Vanity says Ecclisastaces.
The Reformer is the Enemy of anyone who benefits from the status quo.
So year in year out the politicians offer ‘change’ but do the same old, same old and when a politician is real and is new then the whole industry of "has been" wars against the ‘change’ for the manufacturer of ‘no change’ is a very lucrative business.  Eventually the ripples go and calm settles and the revolution goes back to everyone is poor.   Everyone is depressed. The pendulum only swings between todays era of political correctness and everyone who complains is fined or goes to jail and 60's and 70's when everyone could complain and no one went to jail.
They would lock us up if we complain. Dr. Jordan Peterson is denied freedom of speech while Wilfred Laurier is the new Hitler High.
Soon beurocratic interventions, gag orders, political correctness,  Islamaphobia, Hate laws and such make it possible to put us all back in jail. The ones that most need jailing today are the pesky pro life sort who simply stand outside abortion clinics, gandhiesque.
Jesus swore in his day. He had a potty mouth they said. The more an administrator focuses on the alignment of the writing of the page and the quality of the paper the less they focus on the content on the page. Political correctness is all about form without substance.  General Patton swore and Queen Victoria swore. All journalists and Christian leaders and Muslims and Jews and Buddhists have at times had potty mouths.  Expletives are ‘natural’.  Artifice is the life of the politically correct. In the church the emphasis on swear words, especially sexual references is social communism and not Christian. Blaspheming is taking the Lord’s name in vain. Jesus said 'shit!".  It’s not chauvinist feminism ‘protecting the little ladies delicate ears’. All of the statues and law to ‘protect the ladies’ is touted as ‘feminism’ and women in the west are surrounded by ideological burkha’s while they pride themselves on being powerful and free in their poverty.

Political correctness is ‘they lock us up if we complain’ . That’s how you know Canada is communist. Justin Trudeau is a liar and he says he’s for the poor and weak and business. He’s not.  But if he stays in power he’ll probably call himself a businessman and we’ll be able to complain again.

As a doctor I have taken an oath to save the life of Justin Trudeau or Donald Trump or Kim or Adolf or even HIllary Clinton, Lord love a duck.
But yes, Buffy St. Marie, I am the ‘Universal Doctor’ as you are the “Universal Artist”.

We’re all guilty as innocence in the land of the politically correct.

Lord love a duck.

Fear of Economic Insecurity Will Leave Us

Nothing like the rising cost of housing in Vancouver does more to raise the fear of economic insecurity. Highly skilled accomplished friends describe leaving this city because of the criminal wealth from drug trafficking, ‘sharp business practices’, bribes, extortion, off shore criminal money, elite government employees, private armies and private police, political correctness and drug addiction and alcoholism and fear of theft.  Vancouver must rank as one of the greatest cities of theft.  Meanwhile the insurance companies post massive profits and the police merely ‘record’ crime.
I wake in the night worrying and must ask myself a series of important questions
1. Whose in charge?  My very perception of reality is an after thought. It takes nano and mini seconds to process events. I could die and only learn of it as a past event, my consciousness lingering as my body and brain snuffed out.  The idea that God is the prime mover is fundamental from simple reflection. I can’t levitate this house yet a person’s world can be upturned in a second by all manner of natural catastrophes.  My God is a loving God.  My God is omnipotent, omniscient, omnipotential, I say OM in meditation, the letters to some simply standing for “One Mind”, while to others they reflect the primal sound of the universe, the sound that goes to making up our meaning of ‘home’ and ‘mom’.  When I pray I connect with the universe which is on my side because if it were not I’d be wracked with tortuous pain and subjected to all the fears I associate with hell.  This life seems like hell to me but mostly because of my mind and my interpretation and the clinging I do, the desperation.
2. In this moment I am well.  Fear is about the future.  In Biblical times the wealthiest leaders of society at most could protect themselves from seven years of drought by stockpiling grain.  Prior to only 5000 years ago when civilization followed the hoarding of food stuff, hunter gatherers lived seasonally, year to year, hopeful that they would make it through the winter.  Winter is coming on now. This is the beginning of fall. These are the dark days.  These are the days of coughs and pneumonias. These are the days and nights of rheumatism and arthritic pain. These are the days and nights of festering wounds.  This was the winter of rest but now the government increases taxation and attacks throughout the year but mostly in winter with tax collection at the end when stocks are lowest and psychologically one is at an all time low.  These are the seasons of relapses and suicides. These are the days of long nights on call and countless patients crying and begging to be seen desperate and afraid. These are the days of the utter callousness and arrogance of psychopaths and the spawn of nazis masquerading as anything but. These are the days that victimizers claim that they were victimized first. These are the dark days. Halloween is coming. The witching season. The evil nights of wailing and chafing.
But this is also the coming of the Lord.  This is the beginning of the seasons of Advent. This is the time before Christmas when one begins to think of the Cosmic Christ. When all the negativity of the world, the baby soul hoarding, fear based wealth and materialist aetheists, the bullies and the cry babies, the false accusers, the rapists and the pedophiles, when all of that is faced with the coming of the light.  God came into creation and blew the socks off reality with the Word, with his Son Jesus, with the change of Nietzian Superman reality to the Mother and Child.  This is the baby Christ time. This is the promise of life and protection. This is the time of  the coming of Christ.  This is promise.  This is the Good News.
But right now all is well. I have shelter, warmth, running water, food and friends and family.  In the NOW I am rarely afraid. In the NOW I don’t carry resentments from the past or enter worries from the future. In the NOW I practice the presence of God. God is Love. God is forever opening doors when a window closes. God is with me. God has always been with me. Through all the worst times of my life when I didn’t think I could carry on, when I thought it couldn’t get worse and it did, when I thought I couldn’t carry on, God was with me, holding me, carrying me. I love the poem about the two sets of foot prints in the sand. My God loves me as a child, a youth, a man, a woman, a human, a young person, an old person, a poor person, wealthy person. My God loves me as my father and mother and brother loved me even when I was wrong. My God loves me in jail, whorehouses, asylums, parliament, penthouses, biker club houses, in slums and in wealthy homes in exclusive neighbourhoods.  For I have known fear when I have been wealthy and known those that are wealthy to know more fear than some that are poor.  Indeed it is common for the wealthy to be dependent on their wealth for their own sense of safety and suffer as their bank accounts rise and fall.  They know that their friends are only there for their wealth sometimes and all their lives revolve around their economic position.  I have been afraid poor and wealthy.  The idea that it would change is quite insane.  There is never enough wealth because the wealthiest are most afraid of the theives and the betrayals. Et Tu Brute.  Diogenes was the character who the emperor of all time Alexander asked what he could give him and Diogenes asked that he step aside as he stood in the sun.  Important people are always blocking the light standing up and blocking the view and insisting they are doing nothing but there they are casting shadows and not seeing the darkness they create.   We are forever in the shadows of men and women such as Alexander. We develop patience waiting for them to step aside and stop blocking the sun.  We all know there are infinite resources and that if there were less pomp and pomposity all would be rich beyond their wildest dreams but scarcity is built into this Communist System we live in.   The Communists need ‘control’ and would do anything to put themselves and their religion as God.  Today we fight the Aetheist Communists and the Jihadist Wahabi Muslims.   The God of Love will heal all.  The Son of God will fulfill his sacrifice.  All shall be well. All shall be well. All Shall be well.  As the Hindus and Buddhists teach, this too will pass. The Sufis know this in their turning and rotations.   I live only three score years and some and there are billions on the planet and billions have gone before over 80,000 years or more in historical awareness, but there is but one day and one life that I personally know. I am insignificantly significant and significantly insignificant.  The wisdom of the Desert Fathers, Sufi, Vedas, Q Teachings, Prophets, all have similarities. Put not your faith in the outer world.  Dr. Jung called the unconscious the ‘collective unconscious’.  The experience of ego, my thoughts and fears, are the tip of an iceberg.  The mystics call it ‘the cloud of unknowing.’  The alpha and omega.
3. My fear is what limits my economics. If I had faith the size of a mustard seed’ “I could move mountains’,  I would be open to winning a lottery, I’d be open to gifts unlimited from God. Even now I lack the gratitude to appreciate all that I am given but reach far into the future to worry about deadly diseases and calamities. The gifts come with every day and I’m hardly enjoying playing with one when I’m onto another, each new toy only serving a while to dispel that emptiness. Looking for love in all the wrong places. As CS Lewis said, Talking to the wall instead of the Architect.  I’m looking to false gods rather than the real God.  I’m as bad as the CBC news that is such a propaganda machine that it dare not find anything wrong with the corruption in government here that it instead tells us daily and nightly of horrors around the world. When I’m happy I begin to find fears in the future or the past or imagine Steven King scenarios, catastrophic ing and making up all manner of possibilities, hypochondriasis, distrust, paranoia, imaginary fears, phobias.  We hear of tropical hurricanes for weeks on CBC yet no one in Canada lives in the tropics.  I can’t imagine Jamaican radio broadcasting every time Canada has a snow storm yet the old die here in winter and babies die here as well.  It’s all quite absurd. It’s theatre of the absurd.
4. So when I read something like a promise that ‘fear of economic security will leave us’, it’s not just that my fear will go because I know the fear is mostly of change and that I am most fearless in faith and letting go and trusting the flow and trusting that God does open a door when he closes a window. When I move from one place to another in life I must lighten up. The great book, Drop the Rock, described the inability to move forward weighted down with the past yet so much of our identity is caught up in possessions.  Fear is a lack of love. Anxiety has been described as our distance from God.  Alone I’m a single computer, connected into the network I’m countless Kray. Alone I’m right to be afraid because there are  gangs of bankers and gangs of lawyers and gangs of politicians and gangs of journalists, gangs of communists and gangs of nazis and gangs of jihadists and gangs of beurocrats and gangs of Hell’s Angels, and gangs of police and gangs of Tong, and gangs of military units. I’m an individual and am born in shit and piss. My mother is dead and my father is gone and I fear the absence of family.  I am strongest in the company of the godly. We are not alone.  The evil  drug addict prime minister who clings to his wealth and priviledge takes even my country from me and says that Canada is no longer a nation, he destroys our boundaries and gives away our land and our reputation and our future. He plays the emperor with his empress wife Sophie, our sad imitation of Marie Antoinette.  Canadian feminists are the Eva Brawn’s of this world. Patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings. I have no family and now because of the evil doings of Justin Trudeau I have no country. And I feel a scoundrel at times .I feel I did not love enough . I feel I did not work hard enough. I feel I should have studied more. I feel I’ve not lived up to my potential. I feel I’ve been beaten over and over again by thugs and beurocrats, police and thieves, and prime ministers and women, and ex wives and their mother in laws, and tax men, ever the tax men, tax men ,tax men and land lords and businessmen and communists and regulators and lawyers and regulations and regulations and political correctness and trust funds and political correctness and gangs and individuals and women with gangs behind them and light weights with gangs and cheats and theives and countless scammers and bankers and dishonest businessmen and killers and haters and drug addicted and insane angry activists and angry women, always angry bullying violent women claiming they’re victims,the Eva Brawns of the world psychotic and psychopathic, ‘the long necked women and their boys’. In my self pity I’m a Travelling Wilbury’s song.  I’m a scoundrel and I have no refuge.  But so said my Lord. The foxes had homes but the son of God has none. My kingdom is in heaven. My kingdom is not here with baubles and things.  So yes my fear will evaporate when I have the right thinking that Kierkegaard had. “Life is suffering until death’. He said.  An Expectation is a preformed resentment. Buddha said that ‘desire if suffering’.  I can remove my fear by right thinking, by enlightenment, letting go and meditation. I can forgive not for the sake of Justin and Sophie Trudeau or any insane enemy I want to create in my crazy mind, but for my sake. Love thy enemy.  I forgive to free myself.  Resentments and fears are renting rooms in my head for free to the boogie men and women of my worst dreams.
5 Fear of Economic Insecurity will Leave Us also means that God’s grace will save us.  “Give us this day our daily bread’.  The story of Manna from Heaven was that God gave it to the Israelites as they needed it. I don’t get what I want as much as what I need. Doing God’s will, following in the steps of righteousness I will be cared for. Collectively the world is progressing will people living longer and more people on the planet than ever before and more people today have more than what only kings and queens had a mere decades before. Billions not thousands live with greater security than ever before. Malthus has been all but proven wrong.  Yes, the CBC fat cat journalists in the wealth and privilege of Toronto and Montreal will beat us all to death with a  poor reserve and not mention the outrageous wealth of the Mohawk and Albertan Aboriginal. The Fake News of Mainstream Media will always sell to emotions and give information without context to sell a bizarre slice of fear based reality.  We will read a Hollywood promotion magazine with a beautiful hair brushed Kardashian’s and never be told of her Sexually Transmitted Disease status or her toe fungus.  Mida Cyress has body odour. No it’s all advertising and fantasy.  It’s a media lie.  An Anderson deceit.  One day we wake from the stupor of youth and realize as George Carlin loved to teach, how we’d been played. With divide and conquer and lies.  Despite all this we are progressing as a collection of individuals in nations and federations and we will continue to move forward despite the stupidity and corruption of our leaders or because they are serving God and God is really in charge.
6. But what if I have broken all the commandments. What if I have character defects of lust, and gluttony, and envy and anger. What if I have all these ‘defects of character’ and I don’t seem to be able to let go of them.  Then I must ‘pray for willingness’ and know that yesterday I was wealthy , we all had innocence at some time in childhood or as babies and may have forgotten but we did, and I had all those defects of character later and still. And my favourite hymn was made by a slave dealing degenerate who like all of us must have had a spiritual awakening and realized he’d gone the wrong way, was going backwards rather than forwards, like “live”spelt backwards is “evil”,  And it took a while going in the right direction to get on because the backwards detour had gone on for a long time.  I am the prodigal son.  I have lived in the mental and emotional and physical pig sties and eaten the food of pigs when I could have come home to my father who would kill the fatted calf in celebration of having me home. The Hymm I so love is Amazing Grace.  Amazing Grace how sweet thou art that saved a wretch like me. I once was lost but now I’m found. Was blind but now I see.”
7. This society is one of hoarding and gambling.  The closer I am to God the safer I am.  Grace is the love of God which I receive by openness.  I don’t receive what I deserve. It is not the works I do because these follow my love of God. I imitate Christ. And yes I physically fight and throw the evil from the temples as well as hang with the little children and meet with the military and even eat with tax collectors and prostitutes and all the sexually different, the rich and the poor. My service and my duty to God are what count. The courts are only an after thought. They have no inherent truth. They’re the Monday Morning quarterbacks. Steal a little and they put you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king.
8. Thank you Lord for the sun I see lighting the skies over the trees. Thank you for this day. Thank you for a good nights sleep in safety, my friend Laura, my dog Gilbert, and the cat George. Thank you we are all together safe and well this morning. Thank you for our work and recreation and the opportunity for service. Thank you for Jesus. Thank you for Christ. Thank you for saints of all religions. Thank you for creation. Thank you for the changelessness and permanence of your love in the changing impermanent world.  Thank you for this body and this mind and this existence. Help me ever to focus on you and find you in the hide and seek of existence. Help me face the Hollow Men and struggle through tthe Kafka Castle and the Camus Trial. Help me serve you and protect us from the communists and aetheists who know not what they do as they have temper tantrum and drama queen fits and steal and insist that they who are so so out of control want to be in control without any experience or training except their insane fear driven desire for power.    Quiet the hysteria of these political nut bars.  Help me to trust in Thee.  There is One God , One Mind. I am a co imaginer in Thy Imagination. Thy will be done, my Lord. Thy will not my will.  Help me to remember that you always want what is best for me and that you have brought me this far and will carry me home.  I am yours.  Help me to love more.
Thank you Lord.

Nightmares, fear, truth and lies.

I awoke at 4 am, sick with fear. I am again facing threats.  Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness.   I am falsely accused.  The lies are heinous. I’ve been here before. But the dreams are of those who held me hostage and brought guns to point in my face, knifes to thrust under my chin, to make their point.  The bold faced long necked lies are more insidious. The greed that drives deceit is more deeply disdainful.  Last year was particularly trying, the death threats and the threats to kill my dog when a former dog had already been sacrificed.   I still refused to comply with extortion.The extortion is the same. The punishment follows the refusal to reward deceit.
I am here at a conference of doctors. Others are speaking of their fears.  It’s becoming universal.  Except for the elite or perhaps the mediocre. So many shudder, the ripples felt as uneasy laughter, voices kept low in hope that no one hears whispered conversations.    Stand up and you make yourself a target.  I am disheartened to hear of doctors who have left their community because they are not allowed a conscience.  They are purposely being subjected to means to break them. There is no compromise.  Christians are persecuted all over. More so, these days of aetheist communist control and sharia language restraints. To speak is to blaspheme except for the chosen.  And who are the chosen. That debate sizzles.
I am by contrast criticized for transparency.  There are no secrets in our society today. I once “hacked" into the places where all the personal records recorded by governments  were left open to all because then anyone could, legally, look.  Security cost and though I was offered pay I didn’t want to address the mess.  They had not seen the need to protect the privacy except their own because they wanted easy access instead.  Repeatedly I fought repeatedly for confidentiality till the matter became irrelevant.  The illusion of privacy is just that, our government and countless agencies for business and even nefarious designs spy on us continuously. Wikileaks has told us what we all know, that power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.  Sexuality and private communication were once sacrosanct but no more.  The RCMP, FBI, NSA and all manner of public agencies spy on citizens routinely. They pay lip service to maintain appearances.  In hospitals the privacy at all levels except the top is like the gown afforded the patient.   There is pressure on the courts for transparency now.  We need the  full context of body language and secondary communications that slant all information to understand any verdict.  The back rooms prevail but only with bugs and cameras strewn around them. .
Transparency is the only protection, really.  We live in a glass house.  We are only protected by the truth. Relative truth is the illusion.   We know the media skews truth for profit.  Memories are false in hours or days and yet individuals insist their memory is true.  Then memories are fought back and forth before referees little different from those who wear black and white stripped shirts in soccer matches, convene. It’s always political.  Outcomes are bought or won.  The rich prevail.  The winner writes history.  All strength remains with the State, the King, the Big Man, the Big Woman.  Families and tribes compete.  Nation states are struck down. The rule of law is little respected when truth is no more.  Alibies are maintained by tribes and gangs.  Groups and primitive structures that predate nation states prevail.  Individuals are sacrificed or crucified.  Virgins, the young and so often Christians and especially Jews have always been the favoured entertainment in the games.  Animals and gladiators play to a different sort.
I am always anxious.  I am more anxious older.  I have served a society that once wanted law and order but the very structures of that old group are now torn asunder. The pedophiles I saw locked up will have their revenge on me.  The liars are more powerful each day as the power  shifts to celebrate the mob.  Marches upon marches define the present. A media chosen spokesperson with camera angles and lighting lies.  I’m not a marcher. I’m afraid in large crowds.  The young and physical prevail in war.  I was promised protection.  I was bred a hot house plant.  Old, academic, scholarly, a doctor, I have no more place in this physical fray.  
The campaigns to smear celebrate the actors and actresses. I wasted my time in libraries and labs.  The gossip mills were training new men and women when I was in the morgue. I have consulted the dead while reality tv was teaching debates. I am a minority view. I am a marginalized citizen.  There are favoured groups but my own group held onto truth like Shrodinger’s cat, lucid dreaming and fractals..  The world is any way you slice the pie.  Perceptions are self serving and compete by force.
I cling to the remnants integrity.  I have been violated sexually.  I have been violated physically.  My morality has been questioned. I have studied ethics ad infinitum if only to be aware in the increasingly unethical and uncultured world I live in. My RCMP friend said she joined the force to be a crime fighter but left when all she was allowed to do was be a crime recorder.  I feel a kindred spirit as we increasingly are called upon to promote disease by any other name.
I am tired in the morning.  The nightmares return and disrupt my sleep.  I struggle to remain.  Suit up and show up. Do the next right thing.  I resist the allure of self pity by exercises of constant gratitude. I thought block constantly. Prayer and thanksgiving. I seek to forgive but it’s always hard to be forgiving as one  is ducking arrows.  The nature of the work is in the midst of competing factions, more confused and confusing as the day goes on.  The armchair Monday Morning quarterbacks and the space station dwellers debate your worth.  Any moment you can be collateral damage or cannon fodder.  There is no concern above. Middle management is a casino, the players vying to skim the genius from the games to give back to the House.  The higher one climbs,the more bodies one leaves behind.  The greater the right to privilege and the more one is willing to do to keep the status.
I’ve come and gone. I’ve given up millions and turned down millions. I’ve walked away and wondered  if I’m meant to be a monk or if honourable death is better to the constant grind of facing people who want you dead so they can steal and take what they feel entitled to.  They would have your experience without the time in chains. They would have your reputation without the life of  shame.  EE Cummings called them ‘those people’.  Leonard Cohen spoke of the game, that ‘everyone knows”.
We are rats in a maize. Advance cockroaches in a dream.  Monkeys with minds and nice hair dos.  The question is truth and the judge claims to know this.  Bsseut increasingly all he holds is the gun and jailor’s keys. There are no Solomon’s in the drug addicted hoards.  Consensus is a commodity.  The guillotine is Occam’s razor. The one who fears most is left standing in the end.  The paranoids are proved right as Freud said.
And I am only afraid as long as I forget.  Anxiety is a measure of one's distance from God.  So again I turn and trudge towards Bethlehem.

John 8: 42 NIV Study Bible

"If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and now I am here. I have not come on my own but he sent me.  Because you are unable to hear what I say, you belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desire. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.  Yet because I tell the truth, you do not believe me! Can any of you prove me guilty of sin? If I am telling the truth, why don’t you believe me? He who belongs to God hears what God says. The reason you do not hear is that you do not belong to God.”
The message of Jesus Christ is that God is not some old white hair guy or gal sitting on a cloud directing the universe. The Cosmic Christ is God Immanent.  God manifested himself in the world.  His son, his image, his word are here and now with us.  That word is the word of truth.
To me that is as true as ‘scientific truth’.  The Creationist knows God first manifest himself in Nature before the Fall and before the Cross.  Within nature there is the perfection and messages found in the matter of fractals, in the triangle, in the hologram.  There are immeasurably signs that man and nature did not just happen but were conceived.  A monkey given time simply could not compose as does Bach. The Big Bang theory, a foundation of science, states that there is a ‘finite’ time from creation. Within that time, a monkey simply could not compose as Bach.  Countless other matters of creation could not have ‘evolved’ simply because there is not the amount of time for evolution to occur. Further the idea of mutation doesn’t take into account that most mutation is devolutionary not evolutionary.  Understanding science and string theory and quantum physics scientists see the hand of God. Even Einstein, a theorist, said ‘God does not play with dice.’  This life is not ‘random’ but there is purpose.
I believe my purpose in life is truth.  The language of truth is fundamental.  The deep evil of political correctness language, the language of the demonic, is that it confuses truth.  “My truth”, says the devil.  Of course we all know that there are many perceptions and many angles of vision and experience. Yet in the end, we agree on truth in science. It’s called objectivity. My truth is subjectivity.  Together we know more than as one. Together we can.  The irony and hypocricy and utter deceit of the left and politically correct is their fixation on the ‘consensus opinion’ of ‘climate change’ yet they themselves insist on the language of ‘my truth’.  The very truth was the thing of ‘consensus’ not an individual claim. The devil lies. The devil is deceit. There is a yes and a no.  We know all is grey but the ‘aha’ moment gives us insight and discernment so that no everything isn’t true.  There is truth.  It is from God. It is the truth of science and gravity here on earth. It is the truth of right and wrong. There is morality.
Smoking marijuana and drinking excessively there is a blurring of the world. Everything is okay.  This is not enlightenment but devolution to a lower level of non discrimination. A child puts everything into his mouth and learns that poisons are not to be taken. The drug addict is so accepting so ‘chill’, so ‘cool’.  ‘Take it easy, Man, everything is cool.”  No it’s not. That’s the devil speaking. That’s a lie.  Everything is not ‘cool’.  Maybe in some metaphysical way it is but right here and now the killing of a child would not be cool. Ironically if I offer to taken the drug addict’s drug, suddenly this generous easy going guru of enlightenment becomes more truthful. The same with the politicians and rich men and women who are generous with the goods, labour and money of others.  It is not that they are evil but they do seem to heed the devil more than they heed the father. They are leaders who lead from behind not those who charge with the troops.
The historical Jesus said he was from God and that God sent him.  Fundamentally I don’t know how I got here.  I know from stories I was born to my mother but I don’t even remember it. I don’t remember my time in the womb. I have a birth certificate.  I presume that I exist as Descartes so simply stated, “I think therefore I am”  (Cogito ergo sum).  But I don’t know if I spontaneously occurred or was sent. It’s an act of humility to consider that I might not have the capacity to ‘self create’.  I know about sperm and eggs and that whole biological cycle but it’s all ancient and truly mysterious and difficult and unpredictable and even sketchy in parts that there is today no ‘consensus’ on the ‘start’ of human life.  The abortionists, great lovers of the devil, rich ruthless men and women who are the greatest of murderers and deceivers who have argued that it is not murder to kill even a full grown child in the mother’s womb about to be naturally born. These men and women for money would kill babies and toddler if they could convince the world that they were good.  The devil is the great deceiver.  But no we don’t quite know with utter certainly if God invests the fetus with life at the moment of egg meeting sperm or perhaps later in the womb. Indeed religionists say that each life is ‘predestined’. This means that God meant for the birth to occur. God mean for the egg to meet the sperm and life to follow. God did not mean for abortion to occur.
In this scenario there is a life purpose, that is God and there is the death purpose that is the Devil’s.  Freud called this ‘life wish’, eros and death wish, thanatos.  The devil is murderous. This dichotomy of good and evil is of this world , where truth and lie exist.  There is night and day. There is evidence of particle and wave.  Flow and stasis.  Right and wrong. Truth and lie.  The language is not ‘my truth’ and ‘your truth’ but rather ‘my perception of truth’ and ‘your perception of truth’ otherwise these politically correct nut bars would have us saying ‘my light’ and ‘your light’ and the pc police would have you arrested if you insisted at midnight in utter darkness that ‘its’ night’ not ‘day’.
Language is the first casualty of war.  And don’t get me wrong, I believe there is a war.  The devil is in the detail. The politically correct speakers are demonic. They are liars. They would try to convince us that ‘black is white’ so we will accept that ‘your money is my money’ and ‘your life is my life’.  Political correctness in all it’s forms is evil.  
Jesus Christ was without sin. To sin is to ‘miss the mark’. It means ‘to sin’ is to err.  My intention when I shoot my rifle at a target is to hit the bullseye.  When I miss I have ‘sinned’.  To those who argue that all is ‘determined’ and ‘all is fate’ and that they have no accountability and no responsibility then there can be no sin. Yet I have observed these sinners all my life and they are very specifically willing to accept praise and reward for what they do but unwilling to accept punishment and blame. They are above the law. Their truth is narcissism. Their father is the devil.   They ‘change history’ to agree with what they want because they do not want to admit that their ‘purpose’ was other and that good came regardless of their intent. They would argue that ‘good things’ happen and ‘bad things happen’ and they were ‘lucky’ and you were ‘un lucky’.  They deny they ‘fix’ the games because they are liars.  The devil is a murderer and a liar.  If all is ‘accidental’ then the devil doesn’t have to be accountable.  They never accept responsibility for their behaviour but would rather ‘deny, deny, deny, lie, lie, lie’.
Now  the old language of the Bible is nonetheless a valid language. I can use the word ‘karma’ instead of ‘retribution’. I can put the language of Jesus into the California message of the Secret. I can talk about the first law of physics as God and the second law of physics as the devil. I can show the opposing forces in the universe physically and ask why there would not be opposing forces in man. I feel there is a ‘good’ way to do something and a ‘bad’ way.  If I want to build something I can do it with ‘efficiency’ and ‘least waste and destruction’ or I can cause the most havoc and crisis to achieve my end.  The idea of good and bad, or good and evil is throughout our world and our society. We question the decisions that serve the fewest and celebrate those decisions that benefit the most.
Increasingly there are bankers and financial folk who trade in companies and acquire drugs that cure and yet they price them at maximum profit and show no interest in the outcomes of their decision and how they would affect a sick child.  There is a back lash.  It’s karma. It’s Jesus. It’s Christ. Life’s a bitch.  But there seems to be a connection between kicking and mule and being kicked back.  We know in war that more people are killed by ‘friendly fire’ and the ‘stupid decisions of leaders’ than by the enemy bullets.  This push back is everywhere. This is ‘truth’.
Now the politically correct would lie and lie extensively.  Truth is truth. It’s not a possession. The new consumer society would say this is ‘my planet’. This is ‘my galaxy’. This is ‘my creation’. They sound like little children because they have not morally or emotionally developed. They are not diaper trained either.  Jesus recognized that the world was full of children and he loved the children.  So he said, “forgive them for they know not what they do’.  They are the tool of the devil. They are deluded. They are the zombies who are taken over by political correctness and other godless lies.
Of course it’s not ‘cool’ to think of the Devil as a serpent. Just like it’s not cool to think of God as a white haired elder out on a cloud. Just as God is immanent so is the devil. The devil is that which is inside you that is destructive. God is that which is creative. God and the devil are two voices inside each of us.
Jesus is asking which you will call your Father. There is choice. And you will be accountable.

Journal - Dec. 1, 2015

I awoke this morning and the awful chill was gone.  I live in a trailer.  I leave the electric heater on at night.  The electric blanket does the rest.  When I want to blast the place with warmth I turn on the propane heater.  I do that when I come home and when I get up in the morning.

It has been so cold the last few nights that I've been waking because my bare arm had got out from under the blanket and was chilled.

This morning I awoke and it was warm.  I commented on this to Gilbert the cockapoo.  "Gilbert," I said. "It's warm".  He looked back at me intelligently with just a touch of snyde. "Yes, but would you hurry up and pee so I can get out and sniff shit and pee myself."

And sure enough, when we went outside it was 'wet'.  Yesterday there had been this white frozen Eastern/Northern Canada all over.  

That's when I realized what was happening.  This was the beginning of the Paris Climate Change Conference.  And with all that hot air, gleeful hand rubbing and conference sex the temperature of the planet had gone up another degree.

Gilbert found the perfect place to poop. Life went on.  I'm personally grateful for the warmth.  Normal people, those who actually live and work and walk on the planet have moved with weather and wars and such.  The greatest migrations were in the Ice Age.  There are migrations with war now. But those migrating don't want to move to the north. My Scottish and Irish forebears did just that.  

I'm a northern.  We're not that disappointed to have summer lengthen and the winter shorten. It's not happened yet but we're hoping.  

We've always welcomed migrants to the northern regions of our country but mostly they gravitate to the southern cities.  They complain that there's no one in the north and nothing to do.  My grandfather and people from Europe came here to the north west and built the  cities and roads and railways.  It's been a matter of pride for me to sing Gordon Lightfoot's song, Canadian Railway Trilogy.  I doubt the new migrants will know that song.  It was written and sung in English.  

Mostly I hear that everything that Europeans did was wrong.  The black tribes that colonized Africa and the Asian tribes that coolonized Asia and the Aboriginal tribes that colonized America now are taught to hate the last colonist. It's called 'terms of reference'.  The game goes like this. I hit you countless times but when you hit back, we start the game there and I call you a colonist.  That's what happened with the Muslim invaders.  Now the Crusaders are evil for defending Europe from the invasions in Spain and Italy.

The way this goes, the Jews were the ones who hurt Germany and the Japanese were the victims of WWII.   Maybe our soldiers who fought in wars will be arrested and shot. That's what the Communists did to their allies. 

I am afraid to leave my home somedays because of the hate that is happening right now. Not hundreds of years in the past but right now. Strangers attack me verbally and say I'm a horrible being because I'm white.  Second they say I'm priviledged because I was born in Canada and that I have to give everything to them. 

I know from my work that when people get free stuff and don't have to work for it, they don't learn anything more than theiving. Because begging when there is work to do is a kind of thieving.

There's lots of work to be done in Northern Canada.  

Saskatchewan needs a northern city desperately.  BC has Prince George and Alberta has Edmonton but Saskatchewan needs it's northern city.  

Now old man Trudeau, the father of the present pretty boy son. He actually set up 'work camps' for the young in the north. I visitted one in Northern Ontario. The young men of Canada built a community up there in the cold fighting off the mosquitos and black flies.  The work was 'public work' and the kids were really glad to do it. 

Like the American Peace Corp but inside the country.  This was the great vision of the day.

If the planet warms a bit, maybe then we'll get a city or two more in Northern Canda. 

Funny how no one ever cared about the cold in the north.  Suddenly those living lives of luxury in the equatorial hot  belt where they pretty much outlawed Christianity and have been persecuting, killing, and torturing Christians and other Europeans for as long as man can remember, everyone there wants us here to help them.  I'd be glad if we offered them land in the north and let them get out of their war zone and help build this nations that my family certainly has invested countless lives in.  

I'd like to see that.  I'd also like to have heathens stop biting the hand that feeds. My mother taught me that you don't get by in life doing and saying bad things to people if you want them to be your friends and help you. But then you are actually calling my mother and all white mothers dirty stupid whores. I know you're trying to do it in a politically correct way.  Political correctness is the idea that you can pick up a tourd by the clean end.  I know you have a very bad potty mouth and lie but I don't think it's right you call my mother and all white and Christian and European and Canadian mothers dirty colonizing white priviledged whores. I'd like you to stop that.

I'd really like the courts of Canada to hold legally accountable what people who are speaking in other languages are saying that amount to 'hate speech' in English. I've had countless languages translated to learn what people from other countries are calling me and mine and if I said anything close to that I'd be in jail. So I'm waiting for a list of the worlds 'expressions' in the various languages that are banned.  Until then I get the feeling that the courts aren't working for Canada but are indeed trying to destroy me. 

Freud said when they came to rescue him from the Nazis, "Maybe the paranoids are right."

That's the way I feel with all these southerners demanding money for air conditioning, taxing my breathing, cause that's where CO2 comes from and restricting 'freedom of speech' the very thing that my grandparents and their grandparents fought for.  Freedom of Speech is what is 'democracy'.

And if another person calls me 'colonizing white priviledge Canadian', I think I should be able to call them a "dangerous coloured priviledged invader".  

Now that's been my thinking and soon I'll keep such thoughts to myself so that my throat doesn't get slit in the night. I've studied history and thats what comes next. The fact is, most everyone I talk to feels they're lost, either the banks and courts here are going to turn them into worse slaves or the new migrants are going to riot and ruin the country with demand for handouts.  I'm watching what happens in Sweden and Denmark and am concerned as I'm getting old er when I won't be able to work and I see so many young people collecting pensions that Canadians wanted to reward the old who had worked their lives for Canada with. Instead this money, our future reward, the reward for our soldiers and our old is being given away to those who have never served Canada and won't even go to the north to work.  

But that's my frustration these days.  

It comes down to fear. I'm afraid for the future.  The antidote is to focus on the day.  I know God is in the present.  I have to trust God and live for today. Carpe Diem. Tomorrow isn't here and God will take care of this.  If we're lucky management will be rewarded as all of us are rewarded with 'doing unto others as we would do unto them.'  No body in Canada really is upset with migrants or the southern climate beggars. We're just collectively tired of everyone claiming they're more victim than you are. There will need to be a new Darwin's Award and a Canadian Award to compete with the Olympics, and the Canadian Award will be for those who are the greatest whiners and beggars.  It's a welfare thing now but it really should take itself less seriously.

It's the season too. I'm supposed to be thinking of the birth of Christ and the renewal of the world but instead I'm distracted by the News.  

I'm going to spend the rest of the day trying to be more loving and caring to the people I know. These things going on in Paris and the Middle East are all above my care grade and I know management on this planet given its lies and wars is Satanic.  I'm holding out for the afterlife. I believe that if I change my perspective here I will see the best now and the best will also come. If I focus on the insaneity of my leadership's decision and the deceitful propaganda of the media I'll become just like them.  

But now it's shower and clothing and get to work time.  

Thank you Lord for Gilbert getting better. Thank you for the warming of today. Thank you for truth and free speech. Thank you for the sacrifices of my family through generations for democracy and freedom. Thank you for the food I've got and the clothing I've got and the work I've got. Thank you for my education. Thank you for today's warmth.  God bless to all. Thank you Lord Jesus Christ.