Chill Wind

The chill wind of winter blew down from the northern mountains.
I shivered in my light summer clothing
Walking the dog through the industrial city
Searching for the earth where he leaves fertilizer for the grass.
I prayed and petitioned, begging you to protect me
From stupid people in groups,
And thieving lying individuals who Satan has infected.
Then I thought of flu shots and winter sickness,
There are endless lines of wounded at the door.
It has been so for a quarter of a century or more,
Tens of thousands served,no golden arches either,
Just shortage of resources and chronic abuse,
From those long necked women and the boys,
Hiding in office bunkers behind huge desks,
Personalities clothed in surgical gloves and hazmat suits
Afraid of touching, afraid of the unwashed and angry.
I began working for my father and my mother
Then had a paper route, worked in restaurants,
Construction followed, then the arts, the stage and television,
Before years of study and apprenticeship then this,
A calling from a time on my knees in a university chapel
And she said, "It's just a job."
And I'm now waiting for a million and change of back pay.
As my wealthy friend laugh
Calling me teasingly, a "wage nigger".
He gambles on the stock market in the bull casino,
All the while I thought Nasdaq was a form of Nascar,
Reading late into the night about recombinant DNA
Pondering free will, determinism and the 'sins of the fathers'
As I struggle always with the challenge
Of convincing yet another child not to kill themselves
Quickly or Slowly.
I am dying
As the winter wind comes down from the northern mountains,
As the only help they offer is the criticism of inexperience and arrogance.
So I pray again for guidance, strength and faith
Knowing you are love and hope and good,
Are always there when most I feel alone.
You are the light and warmth, promise and certainty
There is none but you.
And I am coming to you.
Lover,Sweet Jesu.


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