Saturday morning with Laura, Gilbert and George

We slept in till 9 am.  Laura and I changed the sheets before bed.  She likes that and I notice I do after she initiates the process.  I understand how easy it would be to ‘let go’, stop with the clean sheets and showers.  I have to clean the place because of the cat hair and dog toys.  It’s always a whole lot better walking around in bare feet without the grit.  I miss when I had a cleaning lady.  I find I’m paranoid about strangers since I lived in Shaughnassey where the cleaning ladies were the girlfriends of gangs and cased places for the robberies.  It was probably a rare case, like the news stories of pit bulls running through the streets of Vancouver but it’s stuck with me.  I cleaned the carpets myself a few weeks back.  A tangent of thought and writing brought on by the memory of how nice it felt to sleep in clean sheets with Laura and Gilbert and George all in bed with me.

Tom came by last night and Laura informed him that Doug Ford, the conservative, had won the Ontario provincial election. He’s an engineer. His eyes lit us and he said, « So the witch is gone. She destroyed the province’s energy matrix. She didn’t just shut down coal plants but destroyed them. Meanwhile China is building one a week, a month or year. It takes 5 years to get a plant up and running again.’  I was upset with the billions of dollars wasted in Ontario on health care administration and devastation of the doctors in the province and the horrors of growing waitlists under the Liberals . He was upset with the cost of heating and all the taxation for Liberal cronies. 

This is about war, economic and potentially more.  India’s building more coal plants.  It all just takes me back to the decades of living with wind power , solar power, water power and diesel on my homestead and sailboat. Most Canadians sadly only know about the propaganda.  I’m intimately aware of the pros and cons and costs of all the forms of energy production and use  as is Tom who as much a hermit in the country as I was a survivalist for years. I don’t like that the ‘green industry’, totally subsidized by government money, is allowed to misinform the public about the real costs and the real limits.  I love alternative energy and advances in research but hate the constant Climate Change fear Monge ring and the Green Energy Billionaires lying. 

 I like my latest windmill but the first ones were really erratic and expensive. My solar panels have always been a treat but the battery storage and the batteries themselves are major eco hazards. It would take only one dirty bomb to obscure sunlight for weeks in a war where the other guy has coal, nuclear and oil to manage their invasion and take over of all our pretty little energy toys. 

 By contrast I love liquid fuel for it’s certainty.  Coal was great too for heating houses when I was up in the north. Southerners know nothing about ‘heat’ and Canadians are forever being talked to be slick LA types worried about their air conditioning.  Mainly I think I loath Liberals these days for the CBC propaganda.  I just can’t listen to news out of Canada for any more than 10 minutes without hearing lies.  So hopefully the media will be required to stop smoking dope and actually report rather than just making stuff up.

Oh well, the Ford victory provides hope. The propaganda was that Conservatives care for the rich and the other parties care for the poor when each party just has it’s resident corporations. . The Liberals have their big buck corporations, the NDP their’s and the conservatives theirs. My favourite billionaire this year is the aboriginal guy who got rich off casinos and cigarettes while the natives are claiming that they only good and poor and want clean water but spent the money for clean water given them on Zamborni Machines. There was great song, Everyone Hurts that came out in the 80’s and I don’t disparage anyone’s pain except perhaps Sophie who suffers with 2 nannies and claims she has 3 children so needs another.  The poor thing.  

When people vote it’s not rich and poor its this rich guy against that rich guy.  Steal a little and they put you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king. I just don’t like people who spend other people’s money like it was their own.  I don’t like tax and corruption either so that affects my voting.  I found that when I was student and didn’t have to work all day for years I thought it was great that the Trudeau government of the day taxed us all billions so Quebecers could get French on both sides of the Andy Warhol tomato can.  Today working  hard and long, money is scarce and I just can’t stand this Trudeau government’s waste of our pension funds which we paid into and weren’t a ‘entitlement’ . I don’t like him  giving money to terrorists.  It doesn’t sit well with me that a man who murdered an American soldier should get 10 million dollars from Canada. It’s an Hanoi Jane moment.  I just can’t get the taste out of my mouth.   Oh well, I have a classmate who thinks the world of him because he has nice hair. I don’t think she’d appreciate me wanting Pamela Anderson for Prime Minister but ‘different strokes for different folks,’ right Stomy. 

Good to see Tom.  I even had to get out the Bible to discuss Psalm 50 and 51 and the use of hyssop as it pertains to diverticulosis.  

Great pizza last night from Me and Ed’s.  Great Greek salad too. 

I really like the clean sheets.  Laura got me to get the 18 inch kind to fit my mattress.  That stopped the ground sheet from pulling off. Amazing.  Never learned that in the old Boy Scouts. The new scouts will probably get that. Laura was a Girl Guide and she says when I put the first 18 inch sheets on I’d had them on sideways.  She was quite exasperated and wouldn’t go to bed till she’d undone my work and re fitted the sheets.  I think she’s a little OC but the sheets surprisingly stayed on where as I’d been having put them back every hour or so.  I got tangle in the undersheet one night.  So obviously there is some science to this sheet business. Gilbert and George didn’t know what the fuss was about but enjoyed all the activity. 

We’re talking about going out to look at camping stores. It’s a ‘turn down ‘ day. I’ve been reading a History of Crimea and enjoying what a muddle politics was back then with the Ottoman Muslim Caliphate killing Christians Willy Nilly.  Russia protected them and freed up all those Eastern nations before the aetheist communists subjugated them.  They’ve got independence again but the religious war between Christians and Muslims continues, it’s last ugly head being Sarajevo.  I enjoyed learning that the Muslim war machine was stopped at Vienna with the Germans and then by the Polish a hundred years later. No wonder tha some of the  young male migrants in Europe today claim they’re going to do with rape what they couldn’t do with weapons. The Religion of Peace sure has a very war like faction.  Meanwhile Christians the world over are persecuted with more Copts killed by the Egyptian Muslims.  Pakistan Moslems are back to killing Hindus.  Our Christian friend in Bangladesh are fearful today of the persecution of minorities.  The Muslims killed 250,000 Sikhs in one day.  Buddhists continue to be genocided like the Armenians. The aetheists Chinese are successfully taking over Tibet and wiping out the Buddhists but no one cares because Anti sémitism has everyone focussing on Israel the only stable democracy in the Middle East.   Meanwhile Canadian media seems fixated on news from centuries past when Christians behaved badly but by the local behaviour of the day better than any others.  FB doesn’t monitor the persecution of Christians, Buddhists or Hindus but protects it’s own favourite religions Islam and Aetheist. Friends say that in England weekly people are going to jail there as freedom of speech has died as it’s being strangled in CAnada. I couldn’t help but miss Christophers Hitchens, my favourite Aetheist who would truly object to this barbarism in name of godlessness.  It’s all above my pay grade but Christianity has been the religion of truth and truth is simply not acceptable as such in Postmodernism.  

King Lear said to his daughter we can talk of courtly things, whose in, whose out.  I’m old and unfashionable and clearly these are the age of fashion and it’s quite possible we’ll soon see a war with wet noodles fight between the hatted people versus the hatless. Monty Python rules.  There’s an absurdity in the news in Canada which personally I think can be explained by the Cigarette Industrie’s promotion of Pot and the increasing promise of free heroin and euthanasia. Even Ireland has embraced the death culture with it’s new laws promoting abortion.  I’m saddened that Canada which once was a leader in technology is now world renown like China for it’s abortion industry.  I’d be a whole lot richer today if I’d stayed in that trade rather than doing this business of trying to save lives.   

It’’s all above my pay grade. I was talking to Elizabeth about the love of Jesus and the persecution by aetheists murderers of our Christian friend Philip.  Tom told us of visiting Wiillie’s Pentecostal meditation group where hundreds repeated ‘thank you jesus’ for an hour. Good religion since we’re supposed to sing praise and thanksgiving. Given  my personal penchant for  whining and complaining I truly admire those souls who call on the Holy Spirit while I’m usually having looking to Hagen Daz Ice Cream for salvation..

Hallelujah. What gives me hope is the god kids of Anna and Kevin, Kendra, Alex and Isek, Aim’s and Marc’s Paxton,  Derek and Naomi’s Faith, and the amazing courage of friends like Jeremy and Jenny,  Daren and Kate.  I talked to a guy last week who was so uncertain of  the future that he couldn’t bring himself to give even a while of solace to a rescue dog.  I love the mothers and father’s I know. But then I love the transsexuals and gay people I know who are struggling in stable relationships rather than being single hedonists like Hollywood celebrates for all.  I dream of being alone at sea or a fool on a hill meditating but frankly I liked having clean sheets and sharing my Sealy Posturpedic King Size mattress with Laura and George and Gilbert.

In Douglas Adam’s book , Dirk Gently’s Holistic Détective Agency, the old gods’ of England like Thor have disappeared because they prefer the clean crisp sheets of nursing homes to living rough.  Laura and I are considering alternatives to sleeping on the ground today. She’s a bad influence but I confess I like her ideas.  Last year we had the tent in the truck and off the ground. However I didn’t count on the  huge sign saying beware of Grizzly Bears as this was their breeding ground.  This caused Laura some concern. I’d camped here for decades and didn’t appreciate that suddenly billboards had arisen and just when I needed a little Fake News here was the honest truth for Laura to digest. I caused her to be a tad anxious.  After years of tenting on the ground  I agreed moving up to the back of the truck   mostly because I was tired of crawling around.  So we’re off to consider alternatives today. 

I do like camping though if only it makes me appreciate how much I love my Sealy Posturpedic King Sized mattress, especially with clean 18 inch sheets.  Thank you Jesus. Thank you Jesus. And I guess thank you for Trudeau because after him Andrew Scheer will seem all that much better. I think I’d prefer Ford to Scheer but compared to Trudeau, Scheer is Thor and God incarnate.   For now we have to be a third world nation giving money to terrorists and playing teen ager to Papa Trump.  At least Andrew Scheer will not ‘piss on the rug’ like the former famous Canadian pre Trudeau Liberal Prime Minister did.  The  American president of that day lifted the grandiose adolescent Canadians up by his lapels and remind him how to behave in another man’s house.  At least Pierre knew he was a mouse.  To listen to Justin’s pot fantasies Justin is an elephant when in fact Canada is at best a gopher.  I like gophers.  Marmots are even cuter.  .  

So Saturday morning.  I started the eggs boiling  and Laura put them on the plate with toast.  I’ve made a couple of cups of coffee. Maybe showering is in the cards soon.  Gilbert and George having had breakie have gone back to sleep.  I love my large windows and the brightness of summer.  The light is wonderful. Thank you Jesus.  God is good. God is good all of the time.   Thank you for the clean sheets and hope of more nights of good company and good sleep.

Memory

I laughed when I heard the joke , “if you remember the 60’s and 70’s you weren’t there.” Alice Cooper who made his first four shock rock albums drunk and stoned and his next 20 clean and sober joked recently about reading celebrity autobiographies.”I was there and I know that they’re only vaguely true... the memories of then are more like a dream’
I just enjoyed one of many neurological and psychiatric podcasts I’ve been listening to on ‘constructive memory’ The last neuroscientist said the implications of the research are huge and should revolutionize the legal system. Unfortunately it remains 19th century in a 21st century world. Nothing was more trubling than to listen to the OJ trial handling of DNA evidence appreciating how scientifically outdated the legal system is regarding some aspects of evidence.The same holds true regarding memory and testimony.
There are state and trait factors affecting memory. Mood,  attention, group agreement, social acceptability, medication, drugs , marijuana, time of day and pre conception are all factors involved in memory. The basal ganglia affects attention as the hippocampus affects memory but short term and long term memory are also affected by neocortical and subcritical structures.
The reason I remember Beatles songs is as much to do with them being replayed endlessly through my life.
Retrospective falsification is the phenomena of consciously or unconsciously mis remembering events previously held true. The simplest near ubiquitous example are the post divorce claims “I never loved him. I never loved her.’ despite the obvious hard evidence of wedding children and photos and then the change of heart with anterograde ripples. It’s been said that after WW2 not one German could be found who said they’d supported the Nazi party. Even Peter denied Jesus until the cock crowed.
False Memory Syndrome was a term that arose when biological fathers were serially and routinely accused of infant rape and pedophilia not just for psychopathic reasons but based on the fallacies of emotional memory. Metaphors become reality and marketers like Goebbels knew even a lie repeated loud and long enough becomes the perceived truth. Individual memory is like the collective memory of history. There it is said the winner writes history. In the individual there are similar characters
Competing for the dominant narrative.
It’s all further complicated by research on time, causation and perception. The questions regarding time travel are complicated by the multiplicity of possible pasts. This are all sobering considerations to be considered in this latest mental health epidemic of memory and false memory. All this of course is occurring at a time when an aging population fears forgetting their car keys is a sign of dementia. Time really to study neuroplasticity and how that affects memory and read again the classic ‘The man who mistook his wife for a hat’

Gratitude Sunday

Thank you Lord for this day. Thank you for all the blessings you bestow on me, all those I see and acknowledge and all those I take for granted. Thank you for my family and friends. Thank you for Gilbert the dog and George the cat. Thank you for work and purpose. Thank you for health and study. Thank you for my continued interest in learning.  Thank you for my sense of meaning even if it may be arbitrary.

Thank you for the rain. I had planned to run this morning and the rain was just the thing to relieve me from that obligation. Help me to exercise Lord but not too much. I am so thankful for the venison barbecue last night. Thank you for the fine food and the television and couch. These are the things of Sultans and here I am blessed with the joy of entertainment and company. Thank you for walking the dog. i enjoy his excitement with every smell. The fragrances have been rich Lord. Thank you for for Costco and the Mall and all the stock of so very much and Amazon and it’s mail order supply such that I can access readily my needs. Thank you for a fridgerator full and cupboards full of food. I could survive weeks with just the bags of wild rice I bought at Costco. Thank you for toilet paper and soap.

Thank you for my being a winter Christian church person. Thank you for the summer vacation when I don’t feel so obligated to attend but still appreciate the sun and celebrate the Lord in Celtic majesty.  Celtic Christianity is always about nature, tradition and gospel.  Thank you for nature. Thank you for the greenery of this season and all the flowers and buds.  Thank you for my motorcycle. I have enjoyed wind therapy these last weeks. Thank you for vehicles that make otherwise tedious commutes more enjoyable knowing that the cars and trucks are reliable.  Remember the cars of young, the Baja bug that didn’t like the rain, the Rabbit that died, the van that stunk. I am so blessed today. Thank you Lord. And thank you for the high ceilings of my home and that I no longer have the mould and my breathing is better in doors . Thank you for the sunshine and spring. Thank you for the hope of camping and thoughts of fishing.  Thank you for trout and salmon.  Thank you for days without schedules. Thank you for people who respect your age and service. Thank you for experience. Thank you for reality. Thank you for people who are pragmatic. Thank you for those who speak from their experience and not from their beliefs. Thank you for my colleagues and teachers. Thank you for the fireplace. Thank you for propane and gas and diesel.  Thank you for electricity. Thank you for cell phones and radios and communication.

Thank you Lord for the sense of connection. Thank you for life and afterlife and the feeling that I’m not alone. Thank you for the We-ness.  Thank you for those who are developed souls and tell the truth and aren’t just driven by greed and selfishness lying for their nefarious purpose and falsely accusing others for personal wealth and gain. Thank you for those who are honest and have integrity by comparison. Thank you for the majority of people who believe in karma, retribution and the golden rule of do unto others as you would want them to do unto you. Thank you for the mature women and mature people of every race and culture who do not live their lives in blaming others and seeking fault and explaining themselves as victim. Help me Lord to overcome my own tendency to self pity and castastrophing.  Help me to remember thy will be done not my will be done. Help me to overcome the pointing finger.

Help me Lord to focus on the positive and not give attention to the negative. There are those who would streak on stage and those who would upstage and those who would shit on stage to get your attention. Help me to ignore them an focus on the good and righteous and all the creative people that are making life good for themselves and others. Help me look on the bright side and see the good when the bad is so obvious.  Help me to give attention to the healthy, like a surgeon, like an immunologist.  Help me to be more aware of the goodness Lord. Help me to see the law and order. Help me to pay attention to all the positives and blessings. Help me to lift my head. Help me to smile and laugh more Lord.

Thank you for happiness and joy and laughter. Thank you Lord.  Jesus Christ Son of God have mercy on me a sinner. 

Pregnant Doctor Delivers

Now that I’m older I have the true luxury of remembering. Those who died young didn’t know this.  As a physician I’ve been blessed to be present at so many pivotal, and one might well say ,sacred times.  I’ve heard countless stories and felt the lives of those who have come to me to share.

This morning, for no reason, these memories seem to rise up like that, I don’t even know of a trigger. Yet this one came to mind and I smiled as I so often do remembering work, the colleagues I knew and the patients who brought us together.

This occurred in a busy teaching hospital.  An obstetrics ward in the wee hours of the morning.  We were all gowned and masked.  We had these little paper booties that covered our shoes.  I remember them most.  The white walls and bloody red sheets. The laundry piling in the corner as all were needed for the work at hand. Later there’d be time but at that moment it wasn’t something we could think about.

“There must have been a power outage over the whole city 9 months ago,” the nurse joked.  

I was at the foot of the bed watching as the cervix dilated and the woman pushed. She’d been screaming for an hour before between contractions when the pain should be least. In addition the anesthetist had just given her a spinal block and begun to administer epidural analgesia.  She should be feeling less pain and be screaming less. If anything her screams had grown louder. 

 I’d asked the nurse about that, as an aside, concerned that something might be amiss.  She nodded to the door where a thoroughly terrified young man was there at the window peering in. He’d come to the little square glass then walk away with an older man comforting him.  I’d seen the older one put his arm around the younger man’s shoulder.

Then the father to be would pull back his shoulders, stand tall and return to peer in the little window.  There were tears in his eyes as he waited helplessly, overwrought I presumed with his inability to do anything but wait.   I’d been glancing out at him now and then while waiting, patiently, for the delivery to progress. 

While the anesthesist was speaking to the patient, the nurse was reviewing the continuous monitoring data strips.  In a low voice , beyond the hearing of the patient, who was either  listening to the anesthetist or screaming her lungs out, the nurse shared. 

‘That’s her husband and father,’ the nurse told me. “They’re old school Portuguese.  Our patient is okay but the more she screams the more the men will care for her and the baby after.  They’ll be helping her now for the whole of the coming year,’ she said smiling.  “It’s a good thing. It’s cultural. She’s going to be okay and she and her baby are going to get a lot of well deserved breakfasts in bed.’ She laughed.

I reflected on the aboriginal patients I’d delivered who’d been a different challenge. Their stoicism and silence had been the means to recognition in the family and  community.  As a doctor I had so much to learn about how people express themselves in sickness and in health.  I had to listen for the different cues that something which might be normal had changed to something that might be more concerning. The older nurses especially in Obstetrics were a wealth of experience and insight. Early days I felt like a hamster on a wheel forever playing catch up. 

I was brought back to the present, not by a fresh crescendo of screams but by the door bursting open and another gurney rolling in as it was pushed quickly  in place  by two sweating hurrying orderlies.   

“We’ve run out of anesthetists.” One said smiling as our anesthetist began to busy himself with the new arrival.  “All the delivery rooms are full and we’re  doubling up.”

I was suddenly very anxious. I was very new to this, only a few deliveries under my belt. My lady was almost fully dilated and here was this new lady well on her way by the rate of the her contractions.  

I think the older anesthetist could see I was concerned if not outright terrrifed.  He said, “Her doctor will be on the way. She was just delivering another lady before I came here.  If all else fails I’ll gladly help at your end.  I’ve been there many times before,” he laughed with the infectious confidence of maturity and experience.  My patient screamed. The other patient screamed.  The nurses eyes twinkled.  It was already a long night.

At that moment a very very large young female doctor burst into the delivery room and went to the side of the newest patient taking her hand, speaking kindly and calmly to her as she looked over the monitor.  

“You didn’t think I’d miss this for anything,” she quipped to her tired but smiling patient. “We’ve been planning this for 9 months.  Now we’re going to see that it was all worth it!:

The doctor was 10 months pregnant herself if she was a day.  Bigger than a house and nearly the size of a whale. She’d moved fast into the room but could hardly bend to speak to the patient.

Going to the foot of her patients bed she peered down and said to the nurse.  “Already crowning”.  To the patient, she said,   “ We’re doing very well.’ Not much longer now especially given how well your last delivery went. “

“Hi Charley’ she said to the Anesthetist. 

“Hi Annie,” he replied, in the tone of old friends.

“Good morning, Doctor, “ she acknowledged me kindly. 

Looking over my shoulder she saw that my patient was just beginning to crown too.. 

“Primip” she quearied,  smiling at my patient.

“Yes,” I replied

“This is Sarah’s second, could be a close match! ‘ she said looking at her patient and returning to where she could view her.  Turning to me she said, “I’m not going to say it’s a race but if this were Vegas they’re be laying close bets as to which child would come out first.‘ 

“Not much longer now , just a few more pushs Ladies.” She said to both.

It was clear that my patient was more relaxed now that this marvellous woman doctor had arrived, even if she was the size of a house and some at Vegas might be including her in the betting . 

The poor patient  was no longer dependent on me a young doctor obviously wet behind the ears. Her screams had changed  now to more like grunts as she pushed responding to the nurse who’d taken a position right beside her head , letting the patient  hold tight to her hand. 

“Here we go”  Dr. Annie said to her patient just as my patent  became fully dilated and the crown  began to appear.   There was no need for an episiotomy. Everything was going smoothly.  I reached forward as the baby came , cradled the  head, then the shoulders and the bum and finally the legs came too.. The nurse was there beside me taking up the baby in clean linen and, wiping off the amniotic fluid, then giving the beautiful little boy baby to the mother.  The placenta delivered. All the bits were there. The new mother was smiling beautifically, pleased with her little boy. I clamped and  cut  the umbilical cord.  

Normally the father would be invited into the room but with the two deliveries happening and the nurse being more aware than me she’d wheeled this bed out into the hall where the father and mother and family and in laws were all waiting to celebrate the new addition to their family. The nurse returned immediately to be there for the second delivery.  I stood by waiting to be of assistance, not knowing what else to do. 

Just as my lady was being wheeled out, with her baby clutched to her chest, the other baby was delivering.  I’d only glanced over to see the mountain of a pregnant woman doctor between the woman’s legs in stirrups.   She’d been leaning awkwardly forward , stretching out and over the mound in front of her  assisting the delivery.  Her arms had the vague resemblance to the Tyrannasaurus Rex but somehow she managed.   Lifting the baby into the air she exclaimed,  “It’s a girl!”  as she handed the baby to his mother.  

I was about to leave then when the lady doctor said, “I’d appreciate if you ‘d not go  just yet. “

“Sarah” , she said, “Congratulations, but if they don’t get me another bed I might have to ask  to share yours.  My waters broke in all the excitement of your delivery! “ She laughed. It was obvious thought she was  just a bit strained. 

The nurse with the strength of a Sumo wrestler and the speed of a jaguar  muscles  another bed into the room with my helping with the guidance.

 Sarah’s husband had joined her and the two were google gaga over the new baby as the two sweaty orderlies were moving the bed out of the room. I don’t even think they noticed us so caught up in love they were.

Dr. Annie was now  standing partially bent over grabbing hold of her thighs and Lamaze breathing as another contraction passed.  The anesthetist,Charley,  was right by her side. 

“I’m going to have to ask you to help me up on the bed,” she said, “ I don’t think I can stand much longer.”  Together with Charley I helped her onto the stool the nurse had brought forward.  Together we hefted her up onto the bed where she collapsed with a huge sigh.  Lying on her back she looked like an Anaconda who’d swallowed and elephant. I couldn’t believe how far along she’d been and delivered two babies that night before she was about to deliver her own. 

‘Could you tell me how far along I am?” she asked between panting.   Charley was establishing an IV.  The nurse  was spreading the jelly for the  ultrasound monitor.  The baby’s heart rate was suddenly visible and looking just  just fine on the screen.

I examined her then. She was fully dilated and just beginning to crown.    I said so.

“I thought as much, “ she said, between breaths and pants. “I called my own doctor before Sarah. If he doesn’t get here,  I’d appreciate you’d stay and assist. I’m rather occupied myself. “ She smiled and I could see Charley’s eyes twinkling as well.  I really was rather awkward and uncertain in those early years. I stayed of course. Never thought I’d do otherwise. 

“Of course,” I said. 

Her beautiful face was flushed and sweating profusely as another contraction took hold.  The nurse had given her her hand and she was squeezing tightly.

At that very moment,  another rather  tall doctor,  burst through the doors. He stopped abruptly beside the patient and said. 

 “I’m glad I’m not late, Annie. I hope you didn’t wait just for me. ” Another contraction came.

“Good to see you, Charley,” he said coming down to the end of the bed beside me. 

“All’s well?” He said, Charley, myself and the nurse nodding. 

I never was more happy to stand aside and let an older doctor take my place.

“I see a head Annie.  Shan’t be long.  Just another push or two if you don’t mind.”  Dr. Annie gave a powerful push and the baby’s face began to slowly appear, the obstetrician carefully guiding.

And sure enough, another baby girl was delivered that morning.  A lovely little girl.  Five fingers and five toes.  

Dr. Annie’s smile was as beautific as the other women’s.  Her husband came in as I began to make myself scarce.  Even as I was leaving, Dr. Annie, turned her beautiful eyes on me, and said,  “Thank you. ” Then her attention was all for her baby and her man.  I looked back over my shoulder at this wonderful family tableau knowing I had been blessed to be there this night. .  

I made my notes at the nursing stations surrounded by the doctors who’d been called in for this most productive night. 

 I will never forget that beautiful lady doctor 9 months pregnant delivering another woman’s baby before giving birth to her own.  That’s a memory I feel  blessed to have. Looking back I’m just thankful to have been there and thankful to have been of some service to all those amazing colleagues and patients and especially Dr. Annie.  Sacred times. 

Good Government

I am thoroughly in favour of good government. I totally understand and appreciate the need for leadership and beurocracy. I love that there are those people who will deal with the complexity of managing the vast mechanical organism of civilization with the aim of helping the most. I love democracy though know the value of enlightened benign dictatorships. Dictatorships like communist leadership are unfortunately rarely benign.

I believe that people can be individually and collectively be  wrong and the more wrong they are the more they will attempt to persist.  I think there are lessons to be learned from history and from my own life. I’m not a saint. Why would I expect others to be and why ever would I believe something like ‘ trust me I’m a politicians. ‘  History also teaches me that a few bad apples can ruin a whole country and turn it into the night mare religious dictatorship that is Iran today or the horrible nation of Venezuela, once so hopeful. 

There are major checks and balances in the world to stop Naziism and Communism, the fascists and the extreme left wing from ruling the world. Marxist ideologies  are terrifying as fascist one are, Stalin and Hitler happy to be allies though neither was trustworthy.   We have police and military and various organizations in place to reduce the risk of another WW1 or WW2.  We have a supposedly free media and freedom of speech and freedom of religion and freedom of association to help keep government serving the majority not a few corrupt cronies.  In Canada that’s supposed to be the rule but there is a major divide between the rich and the poor and there are serious double standards and extreme hypocrisy in place.

Being a whistleblower in Canada is not only unrewarded it’s highly dangerous. That said it’s not nearly as dangerous as telling the truth is in China or Saudi Arabia.   Yet speaking up against abuse of power and even responding as did Gandhi and others less disciplined have maintained the balance of power.

There is a fear that those who work will be disenfranchised by those who speak pretty and steal ugly.  There have always been con men and thieves.  We don’t want a government of conmen and thrives. Our parliamentary system is supposed to thwart this. 

There has been a movement away from parliament and government by the elected to increasing government by bureaucrats and courts.  Also individuals in corporations and protest organizations have felt right about taking the law into their own hands. There’s a sense that the police aren’t able to manage matters because they are undermined by the courts that increasingly are undermined by special interests. There’s the sense that the lobbyists are able to buy undue power in parliament.  There are similar concerns in other commonwealth countries and in the US.

All this may just be paranoia.  We have survived 1-2 years now of both Trudeau and Trump and never were two politicians considered more vile by half the population.  The country survives despite the daily complaints of the direst outcome.  We were told there would be war and we were told their would be economic collapse. There’s been a whole lot happening but mostly business as usual.  Obviously Pierre Trudeau moved Quebec into the centre stage of Ottawa and sidelined the English, the west and rural people in general.  Now Justin Trudeau continues the undermining of Canada as a whole using identity politics to divide and conquer playing everyone against each other like a Game of Thrones. Canadians are aborted en mass to be replaced by immigrants which Trudeau called ‘irregulars’ There is no law and order and in the US Trump is not supporting the EU Brussels.

Yet trains run and planes fly. There is running water. Hospitals are staffed.  There are wait lists. There are increasing doctors policing doctors with fewer and fewer doctors seeing patients and more and more patients complaining about the failure of the once great medical care system in Canada. But there are medications and breakthroughs and cures  and the system muddles along.  There may be 20 men and women doing the job of 1 administrator necessary with all the graft and corruption and duplication involved but the military industrial complex and the education complex and the business complex and the Health care complex all have their inherent flaws. The point is that the men and women in all these systems are serving some purpose even if it is as a useless seat filler. We are at least not in collapse or at war and despite the constant whine of the Global Climate Lobby the sky hasn’t fallen. 

I just worry they get in the way. like Bed blockers and all those people at rush hour who would be better employed driving at a different time. There’s all this irritating construction but it’s all keeping the goods moving in and out of the city. The roads and highways are all another complex that persists.

I’m critical of the waste and inefficiency and individuals who are ignorant and arrogant and drunk, stoned or dementing.  The point remains that the present government and system and beurocracy are managing things. I’m critical and know critics are generally the most useless. I’m in the midst of the work so I’m at least talking about things I know and seeing the mismanagement up closes nd real.  Yet today we’re still passing. Fail is when the whole shebang goes to hell in a handbacket like Venezuela and all the socialist/communist countries that couldn’t even let the people work and make sure their children were fed. FAiling is all the war lords and gangs and tribes fighting each other. 

There’s a lot that can be improved but its still needs to be said,government is good as it keeps the roads open, and violent crime continues to reduce.  There are simply so many things that government, the politicians, bureaucrats and leadership are doing extremely well. I want to acknowledge good government and the good people in government who are not being lead astray by bribes, ideologues or simple garden variety megalomania insanity. These are the wholesome ones who aren’t mislead by  the Agenda 21 recommendations of the incredibly corrupt and mismanaged UN.  I like that there are warehousemen driving motorized vehicles stacking food in the late night and early morning so that when I go to the grocery there are groceries there. I think all of this government, corporate, private and public is too often not acknowledged. I’m not presently being tortured or watching my loved ones get beheaded and yet to listen to Canadian media and American media all of are presently undergoing genital mutilation and flagellation and the world is about to implode because of poor government. The fact is my genitals are intact. No one is being beheaded in my immediate circle. The sun is shining. My neighbours are barbecuing. There’s no AK47’s being stacked in my Church.  It’s all pretty mundane and boring and frankly I thank our government and the bureaucrats for this.  Mediocrity needs to be maligned but really I must remember this is not so bad and things could be a whole lot worse. Personally I thank the Lord for this but believe God has a sense of humor and that’s why he has given us some of our present politicians.  

I’m really thankful for good government and good leadership and especially all the good people that make things work despite the stupid people in our midst. 

Contes Cruels, Firehall Arts Centre

It had been years since Laura and I had been to the Firehall Arts Centre. St. James Church which I attended for years was just across the street. There’s no excuse. We both said how much we’d liked the performances we’d seen.  Then last year we so wanted to go to the Chelsea Hotel production of Leonard Cohen’s music and songs. But it sold out immediately.   Thanks to the Turning Point Gala I was able to win tickets at the auction for the Firehall.   Laura was able to book our seats for tonight.
We arrived early enough to have appetizers at St. Lawrence Restaurant, this truly fabulous French restaurant with so much character we simply found a block away. I’d thought we’d get coffee nearby but this magnificent little morsel of divine cuisine and wonderful service magically appeared.  The duck pate is to die for!  Laura loved her mushrooms white cream sauce and pastry.  The waiter spoke French. The menu was French. I was taken back by the language and atmosphere to St. Boniface, Quebec City and even gay Paris. But there is no doubt that duck had flown in from  New Orleans. The hostess laughed to see my face light up and said she loved to see that expression of joy people always had when they had their first taste.  We are definitely going back for the main course. They were kind enough to rush our order and we were able to be at the Firehouse 5 minutes before opening.
Our gustatory senses and olfactory senses were sated .  Now we were about to have a sensational  visual and auditory experience.
Contes Cruels was written and choreographed by Serge Bennathan who is simply brilliant.  The dancers Josh Martin, Hillary Maxwell, Molly McDermott and Katie Lowen were individually and collectively original, talented, and really quite extraordinary. They moved so beautifully with such strength and form.  I loved the avant garde nature of the work.  The specific movements might have begun  in Europe before the war or between the wars,  in Berlin or Paris,  modern dance pushing the very edges of art.  Degas was fascinated by ballet. Matisse captured the beginnings of modern dance.  Expressive dance grew out of classical ballet into tonight’s 21st century creation with poetic appliqué and sound intertwining bodies.
The choreography of Serge Bennathan and the dance of Josh Martin, Hillary Maxwell, Molly McDermott and Katie Lowen  was truly gifted.      Shouts, rushing bodies, flow and abrupt changes like the northern spring break up released floods of emotion.  I found myself smiling laughing and frowning with the sheer emotion of the presentation.   Then  the sensitivity of a pas de adieux that touched the most vulnerable space between. And always these incredible bodies moving as if the four were gifted children or maybe migrating birds. At moments they were even humans and briefly angelic. The soothing words of poetry provided reassurance.      It was a black space made tactile by the lighting design of James Proudfoot.  Everything about the performance was memorable.
The audience exploded with applause and standing ovation. The dancers bowed and returned and bowed again.
Now Laura and I really want to go back to the Firehall for more. They have yet to announce next year's performances. It will be great too to see future projects of  Serge Bennathan, a Creation for Ballet BC planned for 2019.  The dancers will go on to great fame.
And yes, we will make the time and book a dinner before at the St. Lawrence Restaurant.

Labyrinth, the Turkish Movie (‘Labirent’)

When I was in Turkey I saw and exhibit in the museum for the decades of Turkish film.  I was impressed by the exhibit. Later I told East European friends how I’d seen all these films on display and what I’d seen was very talented.  They told me they loved Turkish films and that this is what they grew up on. Istanbul was the Hollywood of the East.

Well, Labirent (Labyrinth) was spectacular.  Tom Clancy, Tom Cruise, Angeline Jolie, and 007 all rolled up in one.  Made in Europe, mostly Germany and Turkey the back ground was incredible. Lots of those wonderful scenes of ancient cities.  The real find was the actors and actress.  Atimucin Esen played Fikret, the central character, the police spy operative in search of a terrorist cell.  What a great actor!  Melted Cumbul played Reyhan the partner who was not only deeply beautiful but also very intelligent and when she shot and fought there was a truth about it that’s not always present in the lipstick feminist Hollywood girls. Everything about the acting was real and human and meaningful. 

Tolga Ornek  was the director and did the screen play as well. It was so moving but in unpredictable ways. None of the stereotypical car chase sequences we’ve come to love from the west but fast paced foot chases and counter intuitive switches,with short rapid scene changes to maintain momentum. The car chases were there but different. Indeed everything was refreshing in the photography and angles.  The characterization was rich. .  I couldn’t help but think of the French Connection. It really was right up there with he best of thrillers and action movies. 

The subtitles were great but breaking up the film was the English dialogues when Fikret met with the English Intelligence head, Hugh Spencer played most believably by Martin Turner.  Yurdaer Okur was a really believable intelligent bad guy as was Altman Gordon playing Yousuf Zawas, the elder..

The plot was simple. Internet chatter, a leak here and a counter leak there, and a clue here and a clue there, all the while the hunt progressed with bombers going off and the action crescendoing to the big event.

The synagogue scene was so touching.  The children and family scenes all so moving.  It was heart rending at times but overall just a great French Connection type race against time.

Well done. I’m so impressed with Turkish film and look forward to seeing a whole lot more. The whole cast was great and deserving of comment but I’d  just say.  see the film.  Enjoy a great thriller. It was released in Germany in 2011 but is out on NetFlix 2015.  Great movie Two thumbs up!