Camper Life begins again

Two more days till Christmas and 2 more days after that I head south for the winter. I’ve transferred all that’s necessary and important to my Camper. My valuables along with hunting supplies have gone into storage. I’m on Star Link now and will be able to set it up along the route. I do like stopping at MacDonalds for their excellent coffee and because their wifi carries on from one place to the next. Madigan likes their burgers too.  I’ve all the components necessary for virtual work to continue.  I’ve the next week for camping and travel. 

I haven’t had any special Christmas feelings. I appreciated Hansel’s Messiah but haven’t heard many Christmas caroles. The lights have been wonderful The winter solstice was Saturday Dec. 21.  I’ve been quite exhausted with the outfitting and finishing up details of work.  Now here I am in this little world and almost ready to go. The days are getting longer.  The Birth of Baby Jesus is about to happen again.  The old year is ending and a new year beginning.  

The new President is taking office in Jan 6-20.  I’ll be in the US then and hope that there won’t be troubles that affect my travel plans. I’m looking forward to going to Mexico again this year but am concerned about the migrants and illegal aliens and criminals associated with them. So far I’ve heard that Rosario is safe and fine.  Tijuana is a concern outside major tourist areas but once south of Ensenada everything is fine according to what I’ve learned. I’ll investigate further south

Peter and Larry are wintering in LA. I’d hoped to stop over for a few days, leave Madigan in the camper and spend a couple of days visiting art galleries.  Then I’d really like to move on to Yuma and Algadones. I’m considered a stop at the Salton Sea State Park in Southern California. I’ve the new Honda 3200 Generator and want to spend more time off grid. 

Trudeau money is only 60 - 70 cent on the American dollar.  In Mexico it’s always inexpensive.  Truthfully I like bargains and deals and don’t like paying even more than necessary for the incompetence of leardership we’ve had this last 10 years.  

I’m hoping to visit Hay Bay and see the nephews and great nephews late spring. I’ve my zodiac trailer and motor to bring back.  I like the idea of fishing this summer.  I even consider hunting with the boat in the fall rather than driving all over with the Honda Tracker scaring game away.  It’s always novelty.  What to do till the Messiah comes?

I’m enjoying work. I’ve accepted my role as a cog in the machine and am no longer trying to push the universe.  The Serenity Prayer helps.  I like that it was once said that “Hay would no only lead a horse to water but push them under to force them to drink.”  I was heavily invested in ‘outcome measures’.  My time in Community Medicine certainly affected my Psychiatry training. Now I’m more the ‘facilitator’ rather than ‘healer’.  I don’t have to walk on water. I don’t have to be a ‘channel of healing’. I’m just hear to serve.  I wonder if I had it to do over I’d not ‘select’ much more and help the motivated rather than spend time with those who are by all appearances ‘precontemplation’.  

I’m thinking of death and end of life and what it means. I’ve nothing better to do than this. I could be proactive and seek a different service and role but the present is just fine. I found last year I was ready to come home in a couple of months.  This year I was even thinking a few weeks in Mexico on the beach would serve.  Each year I’ve recovered somewhat though my back remains weak and painful.  I was at a low the last few days dragging myself through packing and stowing but now I’m in the camper ready to go I’m beginning to be excited with life again.  I find travelling listening to audio books, seeing the incredible world invigorating. 

I’ve a number of patients who are chronically angry blaming the world, me and everyone else for their illness,  I think how my colleagues avoid Narcisists , Borderline Personality Disorders, addicted and alcoholic but here I am with most of my practice seeing people who the ‘cherry picking’ clinicians would exclude. I’ve certainly been inclusive but have resented the authorities scapegoating me and others like me because of the systemic problems of the system. Their arrogance is as upsetting as that Herod Trudeau fellow worshipping his own brand of chauvinism and sharia communism all the while lying with forked tongue.

It’s the season of forgiveness. Peace on earth. Joy to all. I pray ‘may thy light shine forever on the sanctuary of my devotion” from Paramahans and Lord Jesus Christ Son of God Have mercy on me a sinner from the desert fathers. There is no doubt I’m a sinner and miss the mark. I observe the fear and negativity and character defects in my thoughts and struggle daily to be a better person.  

Today I’m waiting for Paul to come with his tow truck and take the RV to storage. Laura is coming over. I have a trip to the TD bank and a trip to Ralf’s Radio to get a SIM card for my Satellite phone , The SIM Card I have is only for Canada as I’ve used it for emergencies in the backwoods. Now I want want that’s good for Canada , US and Mexico.  

I like expeditions and adventures. Once I find the place I’ll set up for weeks and settle in with my work and day trips on the weekends. I’m getting myself a new lawn chair in the south. I bought one last year and left it with the tracker. It really was spookum so I’m planning on finding another one of equal quality then I’ll have two .  I still have an old one I’vc had nearly 10 years.  At lunch in the south I sit outside in the sun on the lawn chair having lunch and a nap.  I walk the dog several times a day and will use the Vespa to make store runs. I used the truck last year and the Harley but this year I’m going to try to do everything with the Vespa and leave the Camper on the Truck.  That may change.

It’s a good life. I’m grateful to be alive and well enough to do these excursions.  I’m exited. I love my dog.. What a crazy growly attitudinous companion.  I like the compactness of this, like the sailboat, everything close, all I need in a little package.  The RV is like a house and I know I’ll miss my couch and that this place will become a little tight in time. I only lasted a couple of months last year before wanting to return.  

It’s getting light outside. I’ve been waking at 4 am these last few days and getting up early.  I had a great meal of fish and chips at White Spot last night sitting in the car with service and Madigan enjoying his burger paddy.  I’ve lots of food and just need milk for coffee.  Probably some bread soon too.  

It’s a new day. Thank you Jesus. Thank you God.  Thank you. Thank you.  Thank you.  

Kelvin from Travco did a fabulous job of winterizing the RV and helping me close up the slides and stow for storage.  He really was a god send last year and all winter but especially now,  I’m just so exhausted at the end of the year and Kelvin makes sure it’s all going to be okay.  He checked out the camper too.  It’s sure good to have others helping especially as I age and become weaker, physically if not so much mentally.  But I do get brain fog at the end of the day or when I’ve been dealing with too many moving parts.  Thank you all for the help. We are not alone. 

Early Wakening and Christmas Reflections

It’s 5 am.  I woke at 4 and went back to bed for a bit. I read a delightful story of Elon Musk and humility. I enjoy his mythical character, an Obie wanna sort. He’s like Keanu Reeves.  Nerdy and considerate. Not the Kardasian flash or Trudeau arrogance. I see myself though as an egomaniac with an inferiority complex.  I’m defensive at times. I can trace the recurrent struggle with some wrong authority intent on maintaining their dominance for personal gain. I’ve had a sense of my own ‘awareness’ but how I’ve appeared as a threat to the Borg like corrupt authority figure. I’ve played out the Jesus myth in my life, Herod and Satan and Pontius Pilate.

I say, myth only in the Joseph Campbell sense. I don’t know the factual objective truth of these statements I’ve physically met the Dalai Lama and Bishop Toto, Chrétien and Harper, the Guess Who and Lead Zeppelin. I did meet a Nobel Prize winner in physics or chemistry but forget his name,  I’ve had a host of incredible mentors and teachers, Carl Ridd, Gold, Ray Baker, Graham Cunningham, Hank Olivier, Jack Hildes, Nady el Guebaly. The list goes on and on.  My parents were incredible as was my brother Ron. 

It’s Christmas season. I feel alone but have friends and lovers and organizations and institutions. I’m still working. Today I have three patients to see then head out to pick up my Camper which will be my home for the next months as I journey south for a winter break continueing to work but taking in the dessert and sun like others might take the baths.

I’ve struggled my life to know God, to make sense of this life, to serve.  I’ve also tried to address my character flaws and have fun and learn. I like to say I’m a voice over on the comic strip of my life and I’m playing peek a boo with Jesus.  

I liked studying “I think therefore I am”.  That equation served a foundation to self study. Now I’m living in the day very aware of when I’m in the past and future. I’ve also made major progress in CBT knowing my moods follow my thoughts and focussing on weeding out negative thoughts of fear and anger.  I respond to threat with fight, flight or freeze.  Freeze is the one that gets me.  Stillness. Patience.  

I’ve meditated and prayed and muddle along.  

My work is so demanding.  Spending so much time in the presence of pain and anguish.  Searching solutions or just being there.  Listening. Teaching. Sharing.  I’m a cheer leader in life.  Entertainer , healer.  Erudite.

It’s Christmas season.  Birthdays. Celebration. The earth has moved away from the sun in rotation and will return. I am not waiting for the crocus or the clouds to leave but actively seeking the sun and heat. My third year of this safety precautions. I was so sick in Mumbai. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t get air to enter my lungs and had to become so still in the panic I felt then.  It was like the scuba diving accident I experienced , running out of air swimming against the current under the reef and having to surface slowly.  The sense of panic stays with me.  My personal NDE.  A kind of awakening. I had to take medication for a year for Tuberculosis I acquired working as a flyin doctor in the north.  So many patients with TB.  Mantoux.  The disease shopping up on the X-ray and tests to work in America.  It was always dormant. I sealed it off but carried the reminder.  

We call pneumonia, the old man’s friend.  So many deaths by infectious diseases.  I remember my first cases as a country gp. Late nights at the bedside in the rural hospital.  Countless fights in the ICU.  Then Covid. My friends died just as they had in HIV.  Disease and futility.  The inevitability of death with the sense of immortality.

I fear I cling to life when I could best let go and wear this time as a lose cloak.  I am a soul and all else is illusion. I’m a child of God who came naked into this world and will leave thought.  

Now I make diagnosis of disease and offer solutions in the form of knowledge and medication or referrals to further investigation or intervention. I am so highly experienced in what I do I say in jest I’m educated beyond my intelligenc. I encounter such fear and anxiety , depression, despair, guilt , shame and anger.  I enter rooms heavy with remorse and leave with the atmosphere lighter. I shine light into darkness. I channel healing. I’m a conduit of a long line of teachers and lessons.  I’m out there on the edge with patients that frustrate their doctors family and conventions.  I sometimes miss the ease and simplicity of general practice without the layers of complex communications brought by survivors. We say spirituality is for those who’ve been to hell and don’t want to return. Religion is for those who’ve never been and don’t want to go.

I’ve known evil and godlessness.  It resonates in me or the loss.  I am with the loveless and love the unloveable. I’ve taken a patient from interview direct to shower and stood in the shower with him both of us clothed washing us as the first step in healing. The lice coming off him triggered it. He was a hospital patient and had so succeeded in keeping people at a distance with his smell and lack of hygiene no one had noticed or dared to approach. I held him crying in my arms in the shower.

Half the people Trudeau is killing with MAID and euthanasia are lonely.

His father celebrated the abortion of the children of the Christian and Catholic poor. The rich routinely have three children.  

I have none.  Should I be rewarded.  Through no desire or lack of trying.  What is God’s will.  I live now hoping to live long enough to care for my dog another decade or two so he can have a good life. My own life has been a remarkable journey and adventure .I don’t know where the time went. I certainly had greatest passion with the most extraordinary goddesses, lovers and friends.  

My back hurts. I was angry and self pitying in Edinburgh visiting family castles frustrated at my inability to find more about my grandfather when I slipped on the Seat in the rain and hurt my back, the last straw, early athletic injuries, then construction work injuries, then falls, bike crashes, car crashes, plane crashes, truck crashes, motorcycle crashes.  Miracles of NDE. Lying in hospital beds waiting to hear if my spine had been broken again. Now I’ve evidence of an old fracture and the pain that radiates to my hip and leg and is just a product of my over eating, my lack of stretching, and my self pitying.  Poor me.  My friend says get down of the cross we can use the wood. I’m not Jesus and Jesus died for me so I don’t have to be on the cross.  I do like ice cream, tv and lying on the couch.  The pain reminds me of how much I have to learn and how hard it is to change. I’m fasting and must fast more. It’s a new day I must spend more time on my knees.  Remember the Hound of Heaven and the Long Dark Night of the Sout.  

Thank you God. An attitude of gratitude.  I’m grieving Sally, George, Archie, Bernie, Hank and all those who’ve gone before.  Thank you God.  

Thank you Jesus for this story and sacrifice rebirth and resurrection.  Thank you Jesus.

Turn Down Morning

I loved the song ‘it’s a turn down day’ by the Cykle.  It played on the radio when I was a teen and captured the spirit of pleasant summer days.  

It’s my day off and all I have planned is a Docside Clinic Party at 5 at Season’s in the Park Restaurant Q E Park. 33rd and Cambie. I also have an online Cyberdocs meeting I try to make at 1 but if I don’t I can make the 8 am meeting tomorrow.  Laura is coming over too.

I slept well dreaming of the afterlife with family and friends. I have a sea like the Greek Islands and also a Forest Riverside area where I hunt. I was in the forest house with many rooms,  It was a comforting dream. I was in bed at 10 and woke at 2 and went back to sleep.  I had turned off the alarm but work at 7 anyway and got up planning to sleep more on the couch, I meditated little and was reading when there was a truck outside and a woman, When I opened the door Madigan came out barking. The staff complained about him being off the leash. He was 10 feet from the door but I thanked then and promised I’d have himn on the leash, I don’t like complaining neighbours . It’s not like he’s a big dog and I was there calling him back. I just didn’t want to go out in the rain in my boxer shorts and t shirt, My bad,  I also thought I’m only here for another week or two. Then I’m travelling and the rules will change from place to place. I’m ready for the holidays and away from the constant threat of offending someone.  Canada has become such an offensive nation under Trudeau.

I normally would pray and meditate more.  Martin Luther King would say ‘it’s a tough day so I need to spend more time on my knees’.  It’s actually a light day.

It’s been dark and grey with lots of rain earlier. Madigan needs a walk. I usually do that first thing and also shower but I’ve done little here, I did take care of phone calls.  I’ve just avoided sitting at my desk,  I’m waiting for a call now from Ralf’s where they’re checking my satellite phone coverage, I’ve only a Canadian plan and would like one that covers US and maybe Mexico too. It’s my emergency plan. I have cell phone and Star link.  I just hope to do some more ‘off grid’ camping and use the generator for Starlink. Last year I saw some wilderness style campgrounds in Oregon and Northern California. In Southern California there and Arizona there were places in the Dessert I could pull over for a day or two I’d like to mix it up but still mostly be in RV Resorts.  

I’ve moved all my valuables into storage, The RV is ready for storage too.  Next week I bring the Camper here to tranfer clothes and such from here to there.  I’ve Merry Maids booked and Paul’s Tow Truck.   I’m storing my car on the 26 or 27 with Dave driving me back. I can leave for sure on Dec. 28, 500 km a day driving and a half dozen interesting audiobook planned.  I love the holiday feeling as the stress goes. I feel so relaxed driving south , I love the coastal route,

I talked with Peter and he and Larry are heading out as usual Boxing Day and planning to be in LA Jan. 1.  They’re taking the I5.  I wonder if I should but I don’t like the Grant Pass and I do like letting the little guy run on the beaches. I love the memory of blind Gilbert running on the beaches for the first time since he lost his eyes. I loved his joy.  We do have fun along thee coast.  The freeway experience happens at SAN Francisco and LA so I’m glad for the forest and sea route.  4 -5 days driving was fine,  I avoided night driving mostly last time and that made all the difference,  I’m going to try that again, I’ve a number of RV parks too at the 500 km range so could phone ahead and book each day.  The one night I drove at night and didn’t find a place for a few hours happened because several sites were closed for the winter,  Better planning and research this time,  Each trip is it’s own adventure, 

Thank you God.for this day.  

Chilly Morning

I woke at 3 and 5 to fix the heater fuse,  The vibration or something causes it to become lose so the furnace doesn’t work. It did this last year. I thought it was fixed, I went back to sleep well each time remembering all the nights on call I’d missed sleep and the off shore sailing night after night on watch.

I dreamed I was at my hunting lodge in the valley by the rapids or on the ridge with my truck. In the lodge men were talking of moose they’d shot and I was telling them about the 7 grouse I had in the freezer saying grouse was gold but even I wasn’t believing it. Yet I’d so enjoyed the grouse curry I made last week  I think some dreams have the residue of the day.  Others come from a deeper level. In the next I ‘m in a sports jacket and tie,  a young man talking to a room of older wealthy power family men speaking to my mind on behalf of those who ‘don’t fit’.  I was saying that the ‘choices’ were limited and exclusive.   The rewards of tokenism we’re going to only a select few,  I became impassioned and lost my voice responding to the stupidity of power,  I’d clearly moved some but lost others and felt like I’d often felt advocating for others though in a way I myself was included.  

Like the funny walks of John Cleese,  Some were definitely included but others not so,  

We are taught look for the similarities and not the differences, It was clearly a speech about haves and have nots. In the end I was still welcome though perhaps less so as I’d not moved the most entrenched authority.  That may be the military industrial complex’s. I might have been arguing for the inclusion of an accordion or Banjo in the marine band.  In the dream it was clear I appreciated the bag pipes.  But Trudeau is outlawing a whole new group of guns and gun owners in Canada are planning to paint their hunting rifles pink.  He’s such a tyrant, nazi communist traitor and the cost of heat is probably what triggers such.  the cost of living,  And yet I’m doing okay

My life is good,  I’ve had an adventure though feel passed over.  I feel I’ve spent years advocating for others concerns and now facing old age feel alone and vulnerable It’s all illusion though and I am trained to focus on the positive ,

The dream was a looking into my past, my Canadian upbringing, my values and generosity and willingness to help and courage,  The Cause that Jesus died for, was ours, not his really, He could have walked away.   I always thought I’d go north but now older I’m much more sensitive to the cold and wearied by the struggle of the wilderness. Like the Gods in Dick Slaterly Holistic Detective agency I can see the merit in a retirement community.  I appreciate Howard Hughes living in a hotel. 

I’m my camper I have all I need.  I remember dad with his canoe and motor and van fishing all summer.  I imagine I could do that. But I’m loonging to look at more art, I ‘m looking forward to Hansel’s Messiah,  

I may yet end up a monk,  I imagine I’d still like an air ship,  The way to get around the congestion of the city.  Personal drones and helicopters,  Air traffic control would be a concern,  I do like motion and the air is all that remains unexplored individually. I’ve certainly been a passenger in planes for years at a time, Fly in doctor services,  

I could use another coffee,  Christmas is near and I’m focused on the cold today.  The warmth is inside, We say we’ll love you till you can love yourself We call spirituality growing love inside. The solution is within,  I know this. It’s the practice that’s hard,

Thank you God for this day 

Christ and Christmas

“In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made  In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it,”. John 1,1-6

“The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world”John 1, 9

This is the meaning of Christmas,  Each year the earth moves away from the sun and the days grow shorter, Each year the earth returns to the sun and the days grow longer,  In each life we do the same,  Each day, for there is only one day, we move away from the sun and return to the sun,  This is called the coming of the Christ.  Enlightenment. 

God is all,  I am a child of God as Jesus was the child of God.  

The Ascent of Mount Carmel, the dark night of the soul, and cares left among the lillies.

My Sweet Lord, I really want to know you, George Harrison

Christmas is the tine of contemplation.  In the lighting of candles, families reunited, peace on earth, theRembrandt of birth, love not war, prayer and meditation,  

It begins,  

The days become longer, Another cycle renews,  We go round and round and round in the circle game,  Joni Mitchell.

Yes,  

Thank you

My mother taught me to get on my knees beside my bed and pray to god giving thanks, praying for the health and wellness of my friends and family.  She taught me as child to have faith and trust,  Do not be afraid Jesus said time and time  again,  Forgive,  

Thank you Jesus Thank you God, Thank you Holy Spirit

Brunette River Walk

The day lightened up.  It was gloomy earlier. Madigan and I just did the Brunette River walk.  Several other walker with their dogs, Winter coated humans except the athletes running by in space age body clinging attired,  An occasional dog wore a jacket too.  But the weather was mild.  Madigan having lost hid heavy coat weeks back was warm enough in his summer trim.

I liked the hemlock.  Enjoyed stopping to look at the running river,  

There were no birds today. I usually see mallards and often a great blue heron. My favourite is the king fisher.  I once saw an eagle there close up and some hawks., I do like birds.  Recently the fish were migrating but now there’d nothing much happening,  A CN train went by.  

im enjoying the walk counter in the iPhone 16.  It tells me I’ve done 3,800 steps. 10,000 is recommended. I’m normally doing 3-4000 now but when I began counting I was only doing 2 to 3000.  I really did think I was doing 10,000.  I walk the dog several times a day but what I thought was a greater distance turned out only to be 1000 steps each circle of the park. I used to walk the river trail a couple of times during covid years then became concerned about the bullies, bikes and bears.  It was easier to stay in the park but I’m sure I reduced my distance each outing by 1-2000 steps My best so far in 5-6000 steps.  A minor project, 

Assad left Syria and took asylum in Russia.  I didn’t like Assad and was hopeful when he was almost turfed before Putrin came to his side.  Syria might well know peace.  Imagine visiting Damascus one day with all that history,  I’d wanted to go to Egypt but the Muslim Brotherhood was causing instability and terrorist were bombing Copt churched,  

I’ve been hanging s down turn day. I’d thought to go downtown on the weekend but the congestion caused by the Taylor Swift concert and some other events made it easier for me to stay home. I even missed church this morning having woken and 4 am and then gone back to sleep after 6. 

Laura sent me pictures of her red glittery nails.  She looks very festive.  I’m hardly into Christmas yet. I did read about the Annunciation but haven’t even opened Mathew or Luke.  I’m mostly prepared to go south.  Just waiting to move from RV to Camper. I’ve been investigating RV parks but feel limited by the Southern California and border response to Trumps taking power Jan 6.  

thank you Jesus halliluhaja 

Anxiety

It’s a word for a feeling. A sort of empty even painful hollow sort of feeling Confusing really.  Uncertainty of death.  The opposite of envy. Hearing of people you may or may not know already in assisted living ,  The undermining insertion of mimetic viruses of fear and loathing,  Clinging to the tattered remnants of faith like a flag shot through and through

I believe. 

I love.

 

I am. 

The Creator is not me or if it is me it’s the Shadow side for I know not how to fly or know with any solace the future or even the myth of the past.

If is the season of the Christmas story. Jesus of Nazareth. I’m wholly unprepared.  The Postal Strike.  The Eras Tour of Taylor Swift. The money no longer sufficient in millions or billions now being described in trillions, Inflationn and secular security.  Thieves and capitalists and communist.  The politicians and other salesmen are toting the term ‘giving Tuesday’.  The shell game continues,

I understand gambling. The allure of the dandelion petals. She loves me she loved me not.

A beggar to pass his year of requisite learning must sit with a begging bowl believing that someone will give him food and drink. He must practically accept grace and known the synchronicity of his belly and the universe.

The lack of faith id the satanic.  

The oldest law of the world or so I learned is that Chinese teaching , there are big fish and little fish and the little fish must be fast and numerous.  Conditional and unconditional love,

Thank you God. Thank you Jesus.  Thank you Holy Spirit. Thank you Mother Mary.  Thank you grand fathers and grandmothers. Thank you ancestors. Thank you relatives and friends. Thank you today.

It is 4 am, I went to bed reading Tori Ames and now am awake remembering New York and Moscow.  

Leaches , parasites and symbiotes,

I am thinking more of death, transformation from this world to the next.  Passings, Preparation,  How vulnerable, The begging bowl.

Believing, 

I am not alone.  I only knew of one man crucified or three as a child, Now I’ve learned of millions, the Armenians.I visited an Armenian church,  The priest had no illusions,

My father described men as ‘hard’, meaning their hearts were hard as in scarred. He was anxious in the end about his pension. It ran out at 90 and he lived longer than 90. His children, especially my brother reassured him.

I am today without a child or a brother and thought earlier of the woman how aborted my child and the women who withheld children not interested in anything but themselves as princess and then that day in the room with the play boy and the white dressed nurse ourdfied the door and giving her the vial of white.  The sperm were viable. I’d made all the effort and given the millions and they’d made all the promises and the media blamed it all on men,  We were stupid gullible and Pierre Trudeau pushed abortion and now Justin Trudeau continues the family hatred of Catholics and Christians killing babies, burning their churches and inviting invasion and changing the language.

I am alone,

She once described the men and women she loathed who took care of pets but did not have children,  But false allegations and lies and libel flourish in Canada so where can one be Caesar’s wife within this world of empty begging bowls,

Dog eat dog.  Rule of the jungle, 

Or forgiveness and love.  

Where can one retreat - Cappidocea , Meterora,  A good book.  

I’m watching Star Trek again, the Empire and Rebels.  God the father, God the son,  The passage of earth as a lesson in humility.  

Patience,  

I want to know you Creator.  Maybe if I’m with you I’ll grasp the Hitchiker’s Guide to Religiodity.  The Idiots guide to enlightenment,  I was fervently disappointed to learn Alan Watts was quite the drunk. I’ve thought the same of the writing of prophets and the Church has definitely had it’s drunken propes,  The Imans lust and sneak opium and hashish,

Life on life’s terms,  I am here clear witted offered a daily reprieve from demon drink.  Another escape lost to me, No wonder i follow the Mars expedition story with such interest.  And the demented escape like the psychotic to the dreams in their heads,

God is good all the time,  Thank you Jesus,