Spring and Beltane

It is spring. The first of May has passed. Beltane. A celebration of the new shining one. Belanos, Spring God. The festivals of bonfires in the nights. Groups holding hands and circling them in great simple dances. Couples holding hands and leaping over the fires. I did this in my youth. The Celtic Aryan joy of spring. Surviving in the terribly harsh north, coming through yet another winter.  Now enraptured with the warmth and sunshine.  

The chickadees have come back .Birds returning from the south. Blossoms sprouting. Crocuses and daffodils then tulips. The tulip festival persisting in spite of Covid. Anna’s baby boy being born. Tanya’s bump growing with prospect of another summer baby. My puppy Madigan now 7 and 1/2 months old, still chewing everything in sight and hardly a synapse firing.Then he’s amazing. A wonderful dog with wisdom and depth and heart. He cuddles his little body beside mine when I fear in the night.  He is there, a presence, a friend. I’m reminded that God is with me too. When I feel most alone I need only pray.

I pray when I’m in pain. My back hurts most these days. I’ve days of relief then the weather changes and I’m reminded I’m old. They called it rheumatism when I was a child. The rocking chairs helped.  I need a new desk or chair to improve alignment.  I was in Staples checking them out.  I’ve the desk to get rid of. I”d not realized Covid would persist and brought the office desk from storage. Now I need something lighter and smaller that would be lower and fit with the height of the chair. I used to sit in the hot tub with jets and find relief but with covid they’ve turned off the jets. I used to have an invention table  and hang upside down. I now do yoga and sit ups but my increasing girth with covid has put strain on my lower back. If I just lost weight I’d be fine but chocolate bars and food are solace in the enforced isolation. Excuses.  

Now I’m afraid to walk so much in the trails except at times I deem safest. I used to go out at nights. Now I walk in the parks. There’s gangs living in the woods. I find their garbage strewn for miles.  The homeless hoards living rough.  Not like hobos of old who had civilization. These are animals. Drug addicts, thieves. The evidence of their parasitic existence by all the stolen food wrappers and containers. Bicycles and bicycle parts.  Tents and refuge. Propane tanks and fire hazards.  There are shelters and homes available but they don’t want to go there because violence and drugs and bullying of others are frowned on. Here in the woods they can proliferate in spring and summer.Then they prey on the local communities.  The winters are the time to use the public funded services. Now they destroy the parks and woods and leave trash for miles. Laura says her neighbourhood, the highest costing apartment and condos in the country, smells of human feces.  There ar knife murders that go uncommented on as they lack the political Geist of illegal gang gun violence that can increase the punishment of the law abiding citizens. These Liberals soil the sidewalks.

We looked for the little rabbits on the lawns this weekend. They were thre last month. They’d gone with the little bunnies. Hopefully in hiding. Neighbours said the coyotes had returned. It’s a cycle.  I’m a predator but more and more I feel like a prey.  Our government is the Borg and we here locally are on the Enterprise. The Mars expedition gives hope.

I was thankful to get my Harley back from Trêv Deeley winter spa.  It was a great ride south through across the Golden Ears Bridge and around Pitt Meadow back to Coquitlam. Next step is to get Madigan in the new box. I’m just afraid of anything new around him since he has chewed his leashes and my shoe insoles. He continues to grow. Laura reminds he’s just a baby. I know. 

I’m home working. It was hard to get out of bed this morning. The pain. The fears. The old wounds and resentments.  I had dreamed of friendly places. Last night I was in a nudist colony.  We were all showering. I was happy in the freedom.  We were young. It was the same peninsula where I’m often seeing relatives now passed , and dogs and my sailboat.  Bits and places of a pleasant dream with ladies having tea, my mother happy with friends, my father talking cars with the men. My brother looking through a window at his children. I’m there wandering about. And last night we were all showering.  Men and women together.  Laughing. A snippet from hippy days and country living. I was young once.

I’m here today. So thankful for the birds.  Rob has been telling me what is passing through. The migrations.. It was the chestnut backed chickadee yesterday, the black capped chickadees had arrived last month. Then the Spotted Towhee appeared. I’m blessed when I see new birds.  Even better when I get a picture.

Thank you God for Vivian overcoming covid and getting off the ICU respirator. Thank you that Victor was able to go home after his massive orthopaedic surgery after his fall and fractures. Thank you for the healthy birth of Kevin and Anna’s baby. Thank you for the spring. Help me in my work and guide me in my day. Thank you for Laura and Madigan. Thank you for my family and friends. Thank you for all your blessings. Thank you for spring.  Watch over the staff at the clinics today.