It’s the last day here. We have had a wonderful time. I’ve been out hunting early morning and evening everyday. We have laid about in the after noon reading on lawn chairs and enjoying the views. I’ve seen 30 or 40 grouse and a half dozen rabbits but only shot 4 grouse. I barbecued two of them and had them with steak one night. There’s Brew Cafe here at the RV camp, a remarkable place with superb food. Attractive Australian chef. Burgers and Pizzas and the best of the best breakfasts supreme. She’s only open on weekends and later this morning I plan to get Laura and me a couple more.
I did some work, not much, it’s a slack time. I have certainly appreciated the time off, a real vacation, with exercise and clean mountain air, great company, easy going. A true break from my work, a free man in Paris.
I have even attended my Cyberdocs on line meetings, three this week. I have faced my fear of not being liked, of offending, of being less than. I’m welcome. I’m a part of. I like Nathan and others whose eccentricities have paved the way for my own acceptance. I still feel alienated and isolated at times.
I pray daily much of the day. I want o be closer to God, to know God more clearly and dearly. To gain insight into the ‘way’. I love the sense of being in the ‘flow’. Often now aging I feel I’m in death’s waiting room, yet mostly I just do one day at a time.,
I’ve target practiced here with my 22 enjoying that exercise. I’ve especially enjoyed the 4 or more cold water swims I’ve had in the little lake. I’ve enjoyed the rare times the grouse didn’t dart off 50 to 100 yards out when they’ve heard the ATV. So many just fly up out of nowhere and then are gone into the thick fern and logged ankle breaking bush and forest. Only one landed in a tree I could see and he became food.
I’m having a coffee here. The sunrise was spectacular with a lovely pink clouds. Now the sun is fully up. I’ve been out in the bush watching slash for deer. Yet there’s been no sign. No tracks. No poop. Even in the forest when I’ve walked along trails I ‘ve only seen one hoof print of indeterminate age. I guess that migrant deer come here later in the years with the snow because there is evidence of hunters camps from previous years.
It would be great if I continued now to write the various novels I have vaguely planned. A part of me sees me doing that when I’m less capable of physically demanding activities. This hunting has been exercise and good activity. I have helped my upper body strength and spine mobility with the strenuous ATV driving. I’ve walked and hiked and climbed a bit. Truly not enough but an hour or more each day that’s more strenuous than the exercise I get walking the dog at home. The swims haven’t been long but the cold water has been good.
I’ve read Facebook and the family activities, watching the pictures of the grand nephews and following the adventures of the nephews and sister in law. Hay Bay improvements continue with Graeme and Adell completing the gazebo screening it in so there’s now a place to sit by the lake. Meagan and Allen flew back to England for a few weeks
I’ve followed the friends on Facebook, severa now hunting and getting big game. Kevin and Anna with the 5 kids shot 20 grouse and a young bear. A coyote too.
Laura has woken and risen.
I made coffee for here and am drinking mine. I’ve a cup in the enclosed container and a cup of tea ready to go too. I’ll pack up today too
Just checked and I’m not working Monday or Tuesday. Immediately I fear poverty and humiliation and living without in a tenement with abusive neighbours. It’s the feeling of being unable to protect myself from young bullies and corrupt police organizations. Elder abuse. The fear of that and the struggles I hear my patients having. I don’t think into the future because I tend to catastrophising. The truth is the future is bright.
I have squirrels and the stellar jay at the door. Laura is up having coffee with me and Madigan is excited. I plan to make a run with the ATV, hopefully shoot a grouse, be surprised if I see a deer. Maybe see a rabbit. I’m winding down. Just checked and I don’t work Monday or Tuesday so we have another night here. I could aim for civilized existence , more lawnchair time.
I find it easy not to cross dress when Laura is here. The saying goes, ‘he’s not a man without a woman’. We are good together though I worry about our lack of exercise . I worry about cost too.
Fear of economic insecurity will leave us - that’s a promise. Anxiety is a measure of one’s distance from God. I could see the future in meditation and prayer too so the issue of cost is in travelling . Here I have the whole outfit and a place that I can live in either machine so it’s okay. As long as I work I can afford upkeep . Jesus said ‘do not be afraid’. I have back pain and am less flexible and more prone to falling. I’ve lost hearing and sight. I’m aware of these. There’s the fear. The decline. The sense of others dying too. Hearing others have passed and seeing celebrities with all their wealth unable to maintain appearances.
Today rather than being out running about on the ATV hoping to slay a little bird I’m here writing a blog, journaling, reflecting, thankful. Grateful. Thank you God for the company, Laura and Madigan, this great Camper, the IPad, the terrific coffee and cream and honey, the whole life I am living. I love Whistler RV Park and this Ridge View site. We’ve just been observing the neighbours and commenting on their behaviour to their dog. It’s fun with Laura gossiping about the immediate activities. She’s already fed the squires and birds and squirrels. God’s blessings are wonderful. Really. Thank you Jesus for this day.
Just had the Deluxe Breakfast again from Brew Mountain Cafe. Just delicious. Laura said it kept her full all day . What a fabulous meal. Now having coffee and considering a ride on the atv with Madigan in search of grouse. He’s sleepy today and was happy with the walk to the Cafe. We truly are blessed. This view is sacred.
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