India - journalling

I live in small spaces usually. For a decade or more I lived on a sailboat and then in RV’s.  When I travel I don’t feel guilty for having large rooms with nice views.  I do this with Laura along mostly.  On my own I’m not as likely to choose luxury but truly I do appreciate it.  With Laura I’m happier to be in the room that ranging all over trying to see and experience everything.

This last few days here in the Crown Plaza has been like my university days when the work was easy, light patient loads, lots of meetings, lots of time in the office and long vacation and study times paid for by the university or government.  In private practice I only make money seeing patients individually and when I’m not at work I’m not making money. Further other than the tax ‘write off’ for study abroad I am not paid to attend conferences in general.  I used to be a speaker and get handsomely paid but frankly it’s not appealed so much. When last I was a conference speaker I couldn’t relax and enjoy other’s presntations till mine was over.  This conference was so full of original ideas and material  I was glad I could give it my undivided attention.

I like being surrounded by specialists in my field. In my work I’m blessed to be around generalists but thoroughly enjoy communing with ‘my own’ odd and peculiar tribe who sees things in a wholly different way I did when I was a generalist  I’m actually disappointed, and joined 'like minded doctors" because my field was facing  ‘reductionism’ and coopted by corporate industry and government. The patient was decentralized and the doctor was no longer a professional but a ‘health care worker’.  Increasingly, as in all communist countries, the lowest common denominator professionally, but the one who espouses the “fashionable politic’,  is being put in charge.  Health care is likened to other consumer items and mostly seen as an ‘entertainment’ ‘commodity’ in the ’service industry’.  When I talk about morbidity and mortality and 'change' in my community I'm looked at oddly whereas here internationally it's what it's all about. It really is but 'lies' are more profitable. 

I’ve left all those negative thoughts behind for weeks uplifted by the science, research and psychiatry and medicine being spear headed around the world.  

Our life expectancy is increasing.  Thanks mostly to infant and child care and public health measures like clean water and vaccinations people are living longer. A friend has developed a heart condition which mere years ago would have caused early death but now responds to treatment development in my life time.  So many I know with cancer are livings decades longer than they would have a decade ago thanks to advances in medicine.

I’m treating depression and stopping suicide and addiction and extending life while improving the quality of life as well.  Not only am I treating present conditions I’m preventing worse future outcomes and the spread of disease. It’s so uplfiting to be among epidemiologists and scientists rather than beurocrats and politicians whose motives are corrupted by power and money.
I’m not saying that we’re immune but each day I experienced that thrill I had when I first began in medicine wanting to help.  I have helped.  As doctors and scientists and clinicians we have helped, a great deal.

The engineers who developed a cheap efficient reliable 125 cc Honda motorcycle helped just as the first to build a bicycle did.  The world is a better place for technology and science despite the fearmongering and Luddite litanies.  So much emotionalism these day in the news and so little logic, science or truth.

I’m here looking out the window at a magnificent view of the backwaters of Kochi, Keralla.  That beautiful woman, Laura, is in the next room having her bath. She does love the quiet and alone time of bathing.  I expect her morning routine saved her when her children were small.  Even Gilbert sometimes sits at the door waiting for her to come out so he can play with her. 

We’ve booked a car for the airport for tomorrow at 530 am. We’re flying to Bombay where we’ll board an international flight home.  We hope to buy trinkets and stuff there.  In an hour we’re taking a boat ride along the backwaters, a famed tourist activity. I’m looking forward to seeing the fawna and flora. From our 14th floor window,  we’ve been watching the boats go by below us. Now it’s our turn.  When I think of the boat rides I’ve done over the decades of travel I’m impressed with yet another. 

Friends are retired.  I actually miss my work. I miss the staff and the routine. I miss duty and service. I really feel doing medicine is ‘right livelihood’ in the Buddhist 8 fold path. it’s also what Jesus and other saints did, healing. I’ve thought of myself as a healer. Being coopted by courts and insurance as a lie detectors and to validate their money occupations I've felt less enthusiasm.
Hearing of another our age dying and once again reading the philosophies of passing through, I realize I’ve become attached to ‘creatures’ yet again. Just like I have to empty my storage locker I’ve re acquired some mental baggage, laughing to myself at my ‘future plans’ when I hear a friend died who never did learn to live for today. I’m living okay.
When I travel I keep returning to my first love of being with Gilbert by the side of Canadian stream. I really like my truck and camper with the motorcycle on the front and a boat of some sort along. Laura likes this too. My sailboat is another truly happy place despite the countless near death experiences.  Countless Canadian guys with campers and trucks  can’t be wrong. My father loved this life in retirement, camping with his van and his canoe, fishing.  My brother had his house on the lake and went kayaking.
I’ve these books to write and nothing to stop me but general apathy and laziness, nothing a writer isn’t well versed in.  I need to exercise more, watch tv less, eat better, and meditate and pray more deeply.  This trip completed the research I needed for one. 

Otherwise life is good.  It’s certainly been a wonderful time of self care. I love learning.  I love museums and libraries.  I love nature. I’m looking forward to seeing the birds alongthe river.
I’m enjoying photography. The Iphone 11 has been a godsend and the Nikon Coolpix 1000 has worked out very well The Gopro 7 Black has been alot of fun. it’s often seemed like one is down and I’ve been glad to have two back ups. It’s not like I’ll have a chance to get another picture next week.  

Breakfast was perfect this morning. The unbeatable cappuccino and a man made me a perfect omelette as I watched.  Other mornings, the breakfast comes with the room and is a huge smorgasbord, I’ve enjoyed mostly East Indian food, but today I enjoyed omelette and hashbrowns pancakes, yogurt, and pastry.  Decadence.  A lot of serious travellers survive on the one meal aday they get with their rooms, maybe having a light snack late in the day.  The nutrition has been great.
I’ve been a lot more active than normal and enjoying food more.Too often I eat as a nervous addiction watching thriller movies.  Here Laura and I actually share a sit down meal and we mostly resist looking at our phones and if we do share with the other what we’re finding amusing.  I love the amusing bits on facebooks.  Funny dog and cat and burro videos, pictures of friends vacationing, baby pictures.  The politics doesn’t change and bores more now that the dictator had taken control and is setting in motion the destruction of Canada as a democracy and land of the brave and free.  The lies are so thick but the baby pictures and kittens and puppies off set the gloom and doom.  

I am so thankful to God and creation.  I’m not lucky. I’m blessed.  Thank you Jesus. Thank you God of Gods. Thank you Holy Spirit. Thank ‘god of my understanding.

Guide me today and be with me and watch over , protect and aid my family friends and patients.  Thank you lord.