Hindus eventually merge with God, the great oblivion. “I am the bubble make me the sea’. Bliss.I like that here there is a conscious search for purpose and meaning. Governments,the world over, are into greedy acquisition and war. There’s a certain altruism in that some of the world’s leaders seem seriously interested in exploring space and making life on earth a better place. I liked that Bill Gates really was interested in developing a superior toilet.
Charity, grace, character are all words that are lost on the hedonist. Narcissism and ego and self interest prevail so commonly for those who claim their activity is for their family children and community. Justification. Animals mostly take care of their own but what of the other.
I’ve looked at life as a place between love and fear, doing what seems right as much to avoid fear as out of love. I can love God or fear God and fear I’m more fearful than loving, I perceive life as hostile. I’m often in defensive mode.
Jesus taught love and commanded ‘Do not be afraid’. He said , “Love God and love your neighbour as yourself”. It is here I feel the love of God most. Yoganada taught love of God. Devotion.
I perceive myself in creation. I.believe we are in God and all is God and that God listens and hears. I can talk with God in prayer and listen with God in meditation. I felt the Ashram with the Christian loudspeaker music was a manifestation of my own inner world. I have the competing quiet and noise within me. Each has a place.
At a 12 Step meeting in Delhi I was reminded that ‘we pray for knowledge of the will of God and the power to carry it out’. Thy will be done not my will. The ancient Jewish text taught all is vanity. I really feel that is true for me. All ego at times despite the ever present awareness.
Even now I’m in a plane with the background noise of flight. The wonder is what is important. The sacred. I’m in flight. I’m travelling with a whole lot of others from Delhi to Kochi. Laura is beside me.It’s been an all day journey.Two flights with stop over wait in airports and two flights delayed. We take the extraordinary experience of flight for granted. I’ve flown more than 50 times,less than a hundred. My first flight as a child. Buckminster Fuller was interested in the number of miles he’d travelled in his life and how this was greater than all those who’d lived a hundred years before.
I believe in a multi dimensional universe. I believe that death is a passage and that I will be reunited with family and pets in another world beyond. I don’t know the purpose of this passage on earth but to date I’ve served as a doctor and had adventure,as well as helping others whereever I am. Playing hide and seek with God. One hand washing another.
It’s a good day despite the long travel. Begun in an Ashram. Good food served on Air India. I have pressure stockings which have helped and taken ibuprofen and Robaxin. I’m reading a couple of novels, one of the Indian Mutiny and the other of the arrest of Gandhi in 1942.
I’ve even napped and will try that again now. Good night. Thank you God.
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