Dams Ford, Langley and the Thor

I’m discombobulated. I had the appointment booked for today but thought it was afternoon. Fortunately phoned at 8 and found out it was 830 but I didn’t make it till 920.  Fastest breakdown and travel yet.

I look forward to travelling but these in city service trips are challenging. I’m anxious and sleep poorly during the night. Long highway drives are relaxing but short city drives are stressful.  Still I’m pleased to be here and know the Thor is in the shop getting the HVAC for engine installed. I’ll have warm feet going south and cool in the driver’s compartment when I’m south. I leave second week of December only 6 weeks from now.

Just had breakfast at the Corner Cafe next door. Lovely Korean family.

It was a slog coming back after being away.  The week before leaving and weak coming back to work for a physician have always been a deluge. I actually attended at thee clinic and maitntained work getting the laundry done, attending my meetings.  I’ll have to do a trip to the storage locker to remove all hunting supplies for going south. I’ve given Traveland the dimensions of the outdoor fridge so they can replace it with a freezer that I’ll be able to fill with venison. I can take venison south with the information from the butcher and my license  He and I have apts for grooming. Now that I’m over hunting, though I’m tempted to go out again, I could get my nails done. I’m feeling effeminate after the heavy lifting of hunting.  

I’ve lost 5 lbs and feel better but must increase my exercise and diet more.  It’s a slog.

My leg from the dog scratches hasn’t heeled yet. It’s improved and it’s clearly healing thanks to doxycycline. Then I had a sore throat and thought I was coming down with tetanus.  I catastrophize. But I feel quite overwhelmed with my schedule and the demands. I move from one task to another thankfully rather efficiently but don’t get anything done after dinner.  I watch tv. These days it’s Blue Bloods .  

Autumn weather has been love with only few days of rain. The Salmon are running.  The deer are likely in rut with the cool weather in the country. I’m using the heaters to save on propane. Propane came yesterday and I was pleased .  

I’ve been praying and meditating but not so much time sitting meditation.  Since being back I’ve been restless but as I get through the errands I feel I can return to the good routines I had before the hunting trip. The hiking was a great addition with increased exercise and weight loss. I must continue.  Adell tells me she’s playing pickle ball and seeing her doctor regularly. I still think of a sex change and a new personna. I like the anonymity of cross dressing. Not much difference between an old guy and an old lady but I’d like to wear a long skirt out rather than pants. I’ve enjoy moccasins.  I love my new puffy MEC jacket.  I like the terms au drab and au femme and remember how I enjoyed ‘dress up’ and ‘costumes ‘ in my years in theater.  We joke and say that a man who looks at your shoes and knows the desighener is mostl likely gay . I like looking at women’s face and breasts and think Sidney Sweeney is today’s Marilyn.  I feel the challenges of being male have passed and today I’d like to enjoy the more relaxed feminine role with self care and manicures. I could have a manicure.  

I’m very blessed. Thank you God for Madigan. Thank you for this life. Thank you for my health. Thank you for Laura and family and friends and colleagues and patietns.  Thank you for my Thor and Excalibur Hitch and Jeep Wrangler.  Thank you for this weekend. Thank you for the autumn and the sunshine.