Weary

Hi God, thank you for the pretty girls in the spring frocks, the fresh warm air, the cherry blossoms, this starbucks coffee, mac computer, my dog friend, Gilbert and the break from the days of hectic and overwhelming.  I’m mourning. A drowning and a stabbing.  Suicide and homicide.  The beurocrats leave little time for tears.  The dangerous tweak the old paranoia wound. I’m back and held hostage my life threatened by the violent, the crazy killer voice.  The cherry blossoms are pretty.  I have to focus on today. I have to focus on the present. I’m relatively safe here.  The threat of death to my dog isn’t a minor thing. It reminds me of when they threatened my mom.  My life is little consequence.  Corruption and filth are everywhere.  I’ve been close to the abyss.  Lots have.  There’s no special place.  Death is calling all.  I’m dying and living each moment of existence.  Thank you Lord for the knowing. Thank you for the gifts and blessings.
Thank you for the sunshine today.
Thank you for the breeze.
Thank you for family and friends.
Thank you for Gilbert.
Thank you for this moment’s reprieve.
Thank you for this body and this mind and this heart and soul.
Thank you God. What a friend we have in Jesus. Lay your burden down.
Blessed assurance.
Please God help me to see the half filled glass, the rainbow in the rain, the silver linings, the rebirth, the hope, the joy.
Thank you Lord.