Whistle blower

There is none if any protection for whistle blowers in British Columbia, Canada or most countries or places for that matter. Whistle blowers are rats. They are disloyal to their own group or tribe and their own kind. They mostly serve the needs of competing groups or tribes who aren't necessarily any more pure. Whistleblowers are usually idealistic and idealism is often adolescent in development.

I have been a whistleblower. I have paid the extreme penalty for being a whistle blower. I have stopped unnecessary killing and seen that the individuals who were responsible lost their positions. I have been extremely effective in eliminating individual psychopaths and sociopaths but only at extreme personal sacrifice. I have seen repeatedly those who were enablers and turned a blind eye to the most heinous of actions be rewarded immensely by systems which hold 'loyalty' above 'truth' and are fundamentally tribal and hierarchal in nature. I have repeatedly seen those whose job it was to prevent the death or do the thing I did to protect the innocent evade their responsibility and deny their own culpability.

Today, older, more mature and certainly far more experienced I am least likely to be a whistleblower. I caution people to 'wait till you can get the nest'. History has taught us that even if the Allies had killed Hitler in an assassination attempt, Goerring or Goebbels would likely have taken his place. We don't know if they would have been worse.

Whistleblowing assumes that the 'greater authority' on earth is purer. History however repeatedly has demonstrated that corruption, greed, theft and killing are as often indeed supported materially from above. One of the greatest naivities of whistleblowers in general is the idea that 'if the king knew, these atrocities would not occur.' The trouble is that as often as not the "king" is involved directly or indirectly in whatever the underlings are doing. The errors are as commonly "systemic" as individual.

As a whistleblower I was encouraged and supported by others. In retrospect I learned that most ofthese others were most common inferior individuals cowardly in themselves, big 'talkers', sometimes 'liars', even 'two faced' and quite glad to be able to 'cheer lead' or even 'direct' another while they themselves hid in the shadows and like carrion beasts hoped to better themselves from the offal of lions. They wanted blood and really wouldn't have cared too much whether it was mine or my oponents.

Of course other supporters were stirling and in retrospect I would have done well to pay them more heed and followed their advice more carefully. Which is not to say that even they did not experience disillusionment. It's just that they were somehow more graceful about it than I was.

If a problem is systemic, and by whistleblowing you identify an individual killer, if he/she is not just a psychopath but rather more commonly a sociopath, then doing so might merely help the other senior sociopaths protect themselves by sacrificing the junior member but learning how to ward off future attacks to themselves . Winning a battle may thereby delay winning a war.

As a whistleblower I was indeed a 'lifesaver', but the first rule of life saving is not to add yourself to the pile of mauled or dead. The wounded should always reflect that if they had been more experienced or even a bit faster they would have achieved their ends without the loss of so much blood. At least the scars tell us who has been in the front lines as we listen to some back row desk jockey pontificate from the safety of his arrogant, stupid and oftimes academic delusions.

Whistleblowing is often a pyrrhic victory for the whistleblower. Martyrdom is mostly overrated. Volunteers are as often volunteered.

In retrospect I have no doubt that I was right and the individuals I confronted in high places were sick and dangerous individuals who were best stopped. I don't know that they learned anything from the exercise and probably continue to consider me their enemy and may even hate me for interfering. I know they have friends who counter attacked to protect themselves as much as revenge their fallen. The names I was called and the lies that were told and even the reprisals taught me how close I'd come to something much more desparate and deceitful. I know I knew fear.

More likely though I am an irrelevancy, a nuisance, forgotten, as this sort rarely think long about anything but themselves and their immediate gratification.

I don't know if these individuals even have the capacity for empathy. The material rewards that they have made from their diabolical activities and the rewards they continue to make from the investments of their nefarious past no doubt go along way to assuaging any twinge of guilt they might experience. They're certainly 'shameless', lack refinement, despite their superficial manners are really quite brutish. Even lizards can chameleon.

But Jesus did say even "the tax collectors" "love those who love them." Was I 'loving' towards my enemy. Am I sure I did not return evil for evil. In saving others, could not I also have saved their persecutors if I had more skill, finesse, training, or simply wisdom.

Today I question my 'means'. Perhaps the 'ends justify the means' as I once thought but today I see that the killing didn't end. The deaths I stopped were good but they didn't bring back the already dead. As a whistleblower I saved somes lives in the short term but don't really know what was best in the long run. Time will tell of course and the journey continues and life unfolds.

Today ,I'm not sure that the "King" didn't know. Indeed I wonder if it wasn't all the "Queen's" doing. . The old girl network is certainly no better than the old boy network. Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Steal a little and they put you in jail, steal alot and they make you king.

But maybe the 'king and queen' are mostly 'good'. Maybe they do care but don't know any better what to do about the mess than I do. Even Jesus was said to not be able to choose 12 good men.

Older I'm more likely to reflect on Job in these apparently Old Testament times as I am on the 'good news' of the Gospels. Jesus died a young man. Job lived to be very old. To Job God was God the father, while to Jesus, God was daddy. Jesus said mostly 'do not be afraid' but I can't help empathizing with Job who seemed more human than God's "anointed one."

Given my 'pay grade' and my mundane life, I can't help but appreciate the "fate" and "hubris" of the ancient Greeks and Romans who explained their lives as the consequences of the soap opera Gods and Goddesses of Mount Olympus. Our Mount Olympus today by comparisons are Victoria, Ottawa, London, Paris, Bei jing, Hong Kong, New York, LA, Washington and such, with players little different from the Zeus, Pans and Aphrodites of yesteryears.

What happens in my life might just as well be the result of a butterfly's wings flapping in China. I so much more appreciate Ecclesiastes "Meaningless! Meaningless!" says the Teacher, "Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless." I don't take life so seriously and know that it should be worn like a loose robe not like a tight uniform.

Increasingly I'm amused to watch how it all plays out. When I think about rats I remember that whole other part of life, the material world, especially politics, is best called a 'rat race'. Some rats just think they're better than other rats. So many rats in the maze think they're ahead of the game.

Though I'm still a "dog",I'm more a 'cat' person today. Born in the year of the Dragon, under the sign of the fish. I think it's better than being a cow. The ostrich that puts its head in the sand doesn't know who kicked it. Sheep dogs are really no different from wolves except that they protect the sheep. I like best my conversations with the Shepherd. He's fond of whistlers and sometimes gives them the key. Less chance of being out of tune, that way.