All is well. I have all I need. My motorhome is repaired by Traveland. I am here with gas and propane. I live in a beautiful part of the world. It was raining and snowing for a couple of days but now it’s sunny. I love the blue sky. I love the green. The Pacific Northwest is so lush.
I attended a 12 step support meeting today. I ‘m so thankful for the group. I was at my Home Group on Wednesday so glad to see George and Neil and Jack and Stan.. I feel lonely and uncertain. Sally said today she’s feeling down from watching too much News. That’s my problem too. Too much social media. Wendy said life’s either a miracle or it’s not and I choose to believe it’s a miracle. Mack said he felt God had a purpose for him and he was progressing towards that. We spoke of a time when we didn’t like others and collected fears and resentments. I shared how I was wanting a new truck and that in the past I would let that Colour my existence . Poor me I drive an old truck I’d think rather than be grateful I have a truck. Today I’m grateful.
I’ve been adjusting to return. When I came back I spent a week at Traveland getting the slide fixed, working in their offices and sleeping in the Thor in the parking lot. I took a hotel room for a couple of nights and worked a couple of full days. This week it’s been all week I’ve worked. Also I’m feeling I’m over my respiratory illness. I’d stopped the coughing though the throat grated .. Then it was just feeling drained. I’ve been sleeping and napping a lot. Lots of fatigue. Low grade depression. Fear of finances and politics. Yet I plodded through putting on the game face. Doing the next right thing.
Madigan is booked for the groomer. I’ve seen the Chiropracter and feel better. Laura had her car fixed . I’m hoping she’ll come today but she may not. She was here last weekend and that was a joy.
I find myself having trouble generating the next ‘right thing’. I imagine i could go for a walk. I’ve been trying to get to the pool to swim. When Laura is here I don’t seem to have to think about what to do next. Mostly she likes to be fed so I get food or go to restaurants or barbecue. She and Madigan are good that way. Eating is a good thing with someone else. We watch tv together and that’s good. Alone I eat and watch tv but feel guilty I’ not saving the world or praying more. I’ve enjoyed the Star Trek Academy and Brave New Worlds. I’ve been watching Cross and the Good Doctor. I most nights I watch tv and snack for 2 or 3 hours. I remember when for a decade or more I kept the tv in the closet and only took it out for special shows. Then there were the years I took courses in the evening. It’s time I reestablished a new routine and a good routine. I have Madigan to think of. We walk each day and that’s good.
I am very grateful for today, the sunshine, the comfort, the security. Thank you God for this life, for my experiences, for this adventure. Thank you for Madigan. Thank you for Laura. Thank you for family, friends, colleagues ,patients. Thank you for the pine trees and spruce. Thank you for the river. Thank you for the birds. Thank you for the robin that visited yesterday. Thank you all of your blessings.
Thank you.
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