Winterhaven, California, Sunday, Feb 1, 2026

I had thought to go to church this morning. I’d just ride into St. Paul’s but then I had the thought that might have come from the devil or just my laziness about leaving home.

I’m against Net Zero and the demonizing of Carbon Dioxide, in essence of life.  I had followed the scientific debate for decades and noted all the lies and propaganda of the ‘skies falling give me money.’  The polar bear weren’t dying. None of the ‘so called scientific predictions came true, the world is warming as it should but ctatstrophizing or blaming it solely on gas is all unproven and speculative.  The language is religious and Agenda 21 and Agenda 2030 are the kind of pre multifactorial analysis that is the hall mark of modern science.  I remained sckeptical and didn’t buy into any of the extremism and catastrophizing and the give me more money crowd.  

While this was going on I had access to naval temperature charts and water depths so saw that there was lots of strangeness.  The very nature of the questions was political and religious. I got interested in the chemistry early and saw that many scientists and climate scientists and Nobel Prize winners were being condemned as Freud was condemned by the Nazi. 

Now I’m thankful that Pres. Trump has pulled out of the Climate Change Game. Communist china is building coal mines and Canada is suffering under Carney’s net zero policy.  Obama bought waterfront property in Martha Vineyard.  Greta joined the Palestinians.

I don’t like communism.  I didn’t like when Carney said Canadian values were Muslim values. I didn’t like that King Charles and the Church of England were Climate Change Cultists and soft Jesus and  Yahweh in bed with WEF, Allah, NWO.  NWO is China number one.  Anti west. I didn’t like that my minister was promoting Climate change.  It’s not what Jesus would want in my mind. I was glad to see Baptists and other major Christians bodies were not in the marketing rage.  I don’t see it as spiritual. I think individuals need to be compassionate and I am but I agree with Sowell and I think it was Lincoln or Washington that said it wasn’t the government’s job to be in the business of charity.  I know that foreign affairs is unaccounatable money. When money changes hands there’s immense chance of money laundering and corruption.  Under the liberals corruptions is becoming third world proportions.  Embrace the third world become the third world. 

I saw NWO as anti west and pro China and pro communist.  Schwab says humans must be coerced. Trudau was pro NWO and WEF and Climate Change agenda and he’s such a slimy little shit. Smegma creeepy. 

So I feel like an outsider.  Big brain, highly trained outsider and I don’t like or trust communist China. I’ve seen too many refugees from communism, and know too many fine Persians who escaped. I like  Hong Kong Christians who escaped China’s invasion and Taiwan Christians and South Koreans who know China and speak so differently from CBC and the Liberals. .  

I don’t like that my taxes are going to pay Carney liberal patronage. I don’t like the NWO with China First. I’m very fond of Liberty and America.  I don’t like what I’m seeing in Britain and Europe.  

I don’t like mass migration.

The world has gone crazy since before Covid and the ‘great reset≥”. I find I’m liberal but not radical. I believe in anti pollution and migration and different laws for immigrants especially illegal immigrants upsest me.

I’m pro LGBT but I don’t link that social programming of children should be done by non parents. I think all the left wing socialization out of the Arts crowd has really hurt our STEM competitiveness.

I’m always thinking that there’s a risk of war. The Kennedy Missle crisis left that scar and the Cold War which we won eventually by being strong. . My study of history is that praying for peace and being prepared for war is good sense.

I’m enjoying AA but have turned down a couple of requests to be a speaker because right now I’m feeling overwhelmed on an expedition with my motorhome while maintaining a practice .  It’s all tiring.  I’ve done all the things I wanted to do and am at the apogee of my journey.  I’ve booked another week and I’m here Sunday with a week of work then leaving Friday.  

I’ve walked the dog and I’m already mentally beginning to return to Canada.

I was thankful Pierre Poilevre won the Conservative Leadership review. I’d like a conservative government.  I’m so tired of paying so much taxes . I don’t like that I’m paying off my home too. I have a desire for a Maverick truck to tow behind.  I’m feeling old to ‘depend’ on 2 wheels. I miss my Mini but can’t tow it. I have to pay for the repair of my camper too then I’d like to sell the truck and camper and pay off the loan for this motorhome.  I can only pay down the loan but I really don’t needs to think like that.  I have the money and I’m paying the loan.  I just feel like that locks me into working and yet I like working.  

Today I’m feeling guilty I’m not moving forward on my books.  If I got a more advanced printer I could perhaps do that.  I’m having trouble organizing .  I think if I printed out the pages old fashioned way and had a book draft I’d progress.  My friend is writing a book and it reminds me I need to do something. I do spurts. 

My back hurts and my foot hurts and I’m not walking as much as I’d hoped.   I imagine back home I could swim more.  I’ve these foundations exercises but I’m only doing 15 minutes a day. I’m only walking 3000 to 4000 steps rather than 10.000 steps.  I’m only meditating 15 minutes to a half hour and I could double that.  I feel lonely at times.  My dog wants more attention than I give him.  

I need to be more grateful .  

It’s a really lovely day. Hot with some wind.  There’s a woman walking an old dog down the way.  

But I really don’t want to give money to the church for more Climate Change Meetings. The southern Baptists and Mormons aren’t into the Clmate Change Cult /Hoax/Money laundering. Greta Carney Thurnberg Trudeau Sharia Communism, China first hustle..  I want my taxes to go down and what taxes I pay go to roads and not more meetings of liberal cronies.

The trouble with the Southern Baptists is that they’re against LGBT.  I’m socially liberal but fiscally conservative.  

I feel like I don’t fit.  It’s an intrinsic error today.  

I roasted  some Ethiopian beans and the smoke detector alarm went off and I had to open all the windows  and doors despite having the fans on.  I don’t understand that roaster. Tt works well then another time it does this. I think it’s all about my not being exact about it being filled so it stops and burns.  Another learning curve but I’ve more coffee and think I’ll have another.

I miss Leonard Cohen and his song There is a War and I want a new Face. 

I might lie down and nap and read. I like doing that.  

I don’t like theWHO anymore. I saw the political nature of it in Malaysia where science became subsumed by color of the skin. In India I saw the UN guy being followed for money.  Everywhere I look these days I see scientists and colleagues priorizing funding.  That probably always was.  Certainly it was the scandal when I came to VGH .  I haven’t thought about money. I focus on doing the next right thing.  Yet money concerns me. I’m bothered by the debt.  But God has always provided my daily bread and I’ve always paid off debts and loans and kept my head well above water.  I’ve paid off the waste and spite of divorces. I’ve actually survived.  I’ve worked all the time and am at an age where so many are retiring well and have so much while I’m a minimalist.  There’s that creepy ‘poor me’ ‘self pity’ thing coming in that I have to block because really I’m blessed beyond my wildest dreams. I have so much and have been given so much and want really for a closer walk with thee.

It’s not rocket science. If God is the source of joy and bliss being closer would be good. I could go to Ocean side and make trips to the SRF fellowship and meditate more but then I can do the same in Vancouver. I can also join the taichi association when I get back. Mostly I’m looking forward to seeing my chiropractor.  In Fountain of Youth I can do more soaking in the hotsprings. It’s so good for healing.  I’m enjoying walking the little guy back and forth to the dog park here . The dog park there is better because he has all his friends. 

I still could go to St. Paul’s and participate in Christian fellowship. It’s only 9 and the service is at 10.30.  I can even take him.  I could have another coffee too.  

I woke this morning in mental mess .  There’s a lot to be said for doing nothing today.  Spending no money.  Enjoying the desert and heat I could even get out a lawn chair.  I’ve been enjoying lying on my couch inside with air conditioning.  

What do you want me to do God. Guide me.  Loving God of my understanding.  

I’ve a friend diagnosed terminal cancer and am praying for him.  

I’m trying my best to do all I can for my patients and am sorry for so many in extreme pain who are on waitlists for health care. Death by waitlist the Carney Liberals have brought in millions without infrastructure.  They’ve given themselves raises but I’m a doctor and working still and I’ve not been given a raise. No body on the front lines is getting support.  All the helicopter people like Carney get support.

I really have hope for a conservative win but there’s so much corruption and China has so infiltrated Canada that I lack faith in the political future. I’d move to Alberta and feel less alien if they separated.  I doin’t want to do more beaurocratic exams.  I’m happy doing what I’m doing. I ‘m truly blessed.

Thank you for this day Lord. Thank you for Madigan. Thank you for family friends and colleagues and patients. Thank you for Christianity. Thank you for Jesus. Thank you for history I know. Thank you for my full freezer. Thank you for my motorhome. Thank you for coffee. 

I sometimes feel the desire to attend an orgy but then I fear disease and strangers.  I sometimes feel the desire for a last drunk but then I think about 28 years of effort at sobriety and that nothing is improved with alcohol and drugs.  Nothing.  The whole lie is there. Reality is best on reality’s terms.  I sometimes long to be blotto.  But it’s all the back to the womb journey.  Turning back rather than going forward.  

It would be so nice to join the Liberal Religion with Woke and favouritism and talk the talk and have a social relativity and  political correctness and fit in. I’d like to  like the Liberals. I’d like to lie like a politician.  I’d like to lie like the bots on social media.  But I’m a truth teller and it’s what I strive for. 

Yet I have this inherent truth or conscience which told me that there was truth in covid and then there was the second year nad the recommendations of glory holes that went over the top. When the Mall was open but the church was closed. When Invermectin and Luvox were demonized. I saw this. I didn’t like the evil that surrounded the government response to the Freedom Convoy. I didn’t like a lot these last decade with the lies about arsonists and blaming everything on Climake Change and Racism. Now it’s tariffs. Yet tariffs have always been around and mass migration was never a good thing without infrastructure. It was too obvious it was anti Caucasian and for Scab voters.

A part of me is that I’ve been to learning to be patient.  I figured I spoke up in my days and paid the millions of dollar price for honesty and truthfulness.  I was also unkind and self centered at times. Now  I’m on the downhill slope trying to go quietly to the grave. I don’t want to rock the boat any more. The river is going home and I don’t want to swim against the current but rather float downstream with God.  I’m really trying to get along, play the game,.  I’ve remained outspoken against Trudeau evil and now Carney evil.  Communism is the religion of aetheists. The aetheists and Islam have made a pact like Ribbentrop Molotov.  Yet it’s far more complex.  Carney is such a lying two faced elite.  Epstein island is a hub, either for black mail or perversion like so many liberals. 

I fear for old age. I fear I’ll be like Dad without my brother to manage his affairs.  

I fear medical care with aging and the lack of it .  Now here I’m supposed to have faith and trust God. Yet when push comes to shove I revert to being anxiety ridden. Self pitying.  I’m lazy today.  I could be robust and go to church instead of staying here. I don’t even need to take Madigan. I could just join and particiapate but the couch is calling and it’s okay here. It’s safe. I’ve been hustling all week and here is a day of rest.  Yet my mind or ego is not at peace with God in charge.  

When in doubt say no.

I liked the priest at St. Paul’s and the people in the parish were kind to me.  

I sometimes have these days of wandering mind.  I miss Laura because she usually has great suggestsion and also cares for Madigan.  

My neighbour with the cane is out and about.  The dog and I like keeping an eye on the coming and going of neighbors. 

When I lie down on the couch Madigan jumps on top of me and wants to play.

I’ve been enjoying watching Space Force with Malkovitch and Steve Carrell and Lisa Kudrow. Great cast and great comedy.  

I have thoughts like if I went to church I could go to Best Buy after and buy a new printer.  But I’ve been spending money and would like not to.  I’d like a day of rest.  I’ve just enjoyed another cup of Yirgacheff Ethiopian coffee.

Thank you Jesus again for this day. Thank you God. Thank you Holy Spirit.