Social Media

I withdrew from social media again.  I don’t feel safe.  It feels like the Maoist revolution is taking place and censorship has gone to a greater level. All I read about is persecution of celts and Christians and support of Hamas terrorists.  Meanwhile the ‘bots’ don’t see humor and declare humor as bad. It’s like the concrete thinkers of Paget’s intellectual development have declared the abstract thinkers the enemies.  It is appalling that the freedom convoy folk are still persecuted by the courts by the Antifida and BLM. Marxists domestic terrorists got a free pass. I hate how the BLM and Hamas people disrupted Pride parades and wanted the police removed.

I liked law and order. I don’t want the streets filled with bullying genuflecting gangs.  I believed there are sidewalks and roads and bike lanes and if people want to have prayer lanes then they can go to city hall and petition for them.  I believe in civilization but feel that is called hate speech today.  In England Christians are going to jail while rapists and pedophiles go free.  I fear that will come here.  The ‘catch and release’ program causes me to fear being on the streets. 

I’m old and being punched and kicked by a gang can break a hip or knee if not kill me. The idea of spending a year in physiotherapy to be able to walk again frightens me.  When I was attacked at lunch time by a fellow threatening to kill me and I stood up to him facing his muscular dance of threat and violence I left uninjured. It was a random thing. He’s a violent young man who cowardly attacks old men. The police could do nothing. It was a close call.  When I reported it the first question was ‘what did you do to provoke him’.   It’s the same question the Israelis seem to be asked after they retaliated again the terrorist attacks by Palestiania Hamas.  I exist.  Some people don’t want me to exist.   That shouldn’t be an IQ test especially when I’m phone 911 crisis line.  

So today I am afraid. 

I woke up and it was rainy and cloudy. I was grateful to be alive. I’m aware of time now.I sense an end which makes every day so much more precious. I don’t think I did, but it feel like I might have squandered some of my life as a youth, not realizing one day there might be a limited amount. I lived life like it was an endless ingredient, like I was immortal. My soul is. And yes I believe I will live beyond death. I could die each night when I go to sleep.  There are many considerations of perceptions.  Reincarnation, life after death, multiple dimensions.  I pray to know God and have the power to carry out God’s will. I want to know what God’s will for me is. I want to align my will with God’s .  Thy will be done.  

I started reading Sources of Christian Selff, edited by James Houston and Jens Zimmerman.  I’ve moved and this book surfaced. It was a Christmas gift from my friend John Chirisitansen who I dearly miss. Ir recently listened to the audio book Breathing Underwater by Richard Rohr.  John had given me the book years again and I’d read it then but enjoyed the audio book just as much. 

I sat and prayers on the rug in my new motorhome. I say the Lord’s Prayer to begin. I meditate on the repetion of a word and focuse on my breathing. I learned my meditation techniques from Paramahansa Yogananda through Self Realization Fellowship. I learned later that Augustine taught the same prayer techniques .  When I was in church it was all lecture and talk.  Simpler said, prayer is talking to God, meditation is listening.  I liked Herbert Benson MD’s research.  

There is still so much I have to learn.  I am greateful for this life.  There is love and fear and Jesus said do not be afraid. Yet when I look at the election and the politics of th world I realize it’s all about my pay grade and my interest is doom zooming. I’ve been watching social media for animals stories, and humor and beautiful models and cutting edge physics and technology and geography . But I will see a new absurdity and share it and be punished by a low brow who can’t appreciate a higher level of humor.  Every thing is a cognitive distortion in the censor police mind, black and white, ridgin , and no sense of the grey. 

I am by nature of my education, profession and age an extremely minority. I have the sense that social media is all about gangs and mostly that’s about set and violence.  Humor has no place in that world.  I remember when the joke about Marxist feminism was ‘what’s a feminist>’.  A woman without humor.  Now everyone is like Greta Thurnbery angry .  I remember a doctor saying ‘if you don’t see the problem I see on a blank page then that’s an even bigger problem.’  He has such a sense of humor.  

I’m going to walk the dog.  

I was upset to see a woman arrested for having pepper spray after fighting over a dark man who beat her and tore off her clothes but she escaped before he raped her only to have the police arrest her for having pepper spray. Meanwhile the next feed showed a man sexually violating the tailpipe of a parked car in public.  I remember the boy who shot the fellow shooting at him and how it was years before he was freed from the false accusations and terror that followed.

Just as Marxist and communist and nazi terrorism teachings the victim victimizer equation always goes to the ‘poor me’ of the victimizer. The psychopath always says you force me to rape and steal and kill .  There is no accountability in these political groups today. Justin Trudeau was the greatest gas lighter in parliament . I thought he should wear a white wife beater t shirt when he talke to women given his tone and arrogance.  But he’s gone and there’s is hope for less bad drama. 

Thank you God for my life today.  It’s raining and I was planning on walking the dog before the rain began and here I’ve spent time on fear and resentment.  I’m off in the dreary and so affected by sunshine. On sunny days I’m optimistic.  Actually it’s so beautiful, the lush green in the park outside that I really must appreciate how the plant must feel. They also like their carbon dioxide .  I’m enjoying Oxygen. I’m only taxed if I exhale .  Inhaling is great but I must not joke. That could get me fined or thrown in jail.  It was said the ones with real power are the ones who cannot joke about.  

My Jewish friend says he’s afraid to go out because he never knows whose whose waiting to be offended and from what century have the come.  We have immigrants now from countries who haven’t experienced the Magna Carta, others who object to the French and AMerican reovolution and so many who don’t believe is civil rights or the cultural revolutions of the 60’s and 70’s.  

These are confusing times. I just want to help people be well, over come their depression, anxiety and get free of drugs and alcohol abuse and know if their brain and body are well and it’s not them but the world that its off.  

Thank you God for this day. Thank you God for all your blessings.  Thank you Jesus